He's fallen over again

[Doyathinkhesaurus]

Your dad’s neighbour rings to say he’s fallen over. Do I go? Do I stay? It's a 3 hour drive. Brother is 2 hour drive. Ambulance has been called. No ETA. He's up and chatting and the blood has stopped flowing. Neighbour wants to know what to do. I don't know!

Send your brother. It's unfair to expect the neighbour to stay with him but the chances are, hopefully, that the ambulance will get there before you do.

I think that the neighbour wants you to say that one of you is en route, OP. He or she is happy to help I’m sure but probably wants to get to bed.

Ask your brother to get over there as soon as.

Take each step as it comes after that. You may have the care package etc stuff to navigate. But don’t worry about that tonight.

Good luck. I hope he’s ok.

Brother on the way. Hopefully it will be OK. Neighbour's mum is former district nurse. She has now turned up and is directing proceedings. We are proper lucky.

If he would move closer it would be a lot easier!

How are things today OP?

What happened in the end?

We used a similar happening as ammunition to ramp up levels of care - elderly person didn't want to put neighbours out or bother them, but equally we couldn't drop everything and keep doing multiple hour round trips at a moment's notice.

You're also not responsible for what the neighbour offers to do or not. If they don't want to stay with the person or can't then they just need to go.

My brother did the 2 hour trip and went with him to A&E. Nothing wrong, just wound care. Released about 6am and home to bed. I'm on my way down now - 3 hr trip - to clean carpets and make sure he has a quiet night, food, colloid plasters etc etc etc...

There should be a falls prevention team in his area. Try and get in touch with them for a home assessment. Does he have a Telecare?

Is there a pattern/theme to the falls?

Does he have any walking aids (stick, trolley etc)

My mum has been having falls lately too. There is a community alarm service in her area where she can wear a necklace or a bracelet thing and call for help 24/7. It is set up through her phone line, I think. It costs £4.20 per week.
Unfortunately she does not have it set up yet as the key safe is not installed outside. She had another fall at the weekend.

She has had a hospital assessment regarding her falls but they are only suggesting minor medication changes and reassess in 4 months.

The only pattern is they are increasing. He uses a stick but won't even talk about a walker!

He has one. He wouldn't use it before as he didn't want to be a bother. He did use it this last time thank heavens as he was bleeding profusely.

Agree that a falls pendant is essential (if he would wear it of course!) It also means a team would come out if he falls and get him up and assess if he needs to go to hospital etc. It costs slightly more to get that rather than having family as the immediate back up but would really be worth it in this case.

Oh yes. My friend’s mother did not like to wear her one as it was not attractive.🤷🏻‍♀️

That varies from area to area. In our area, the team simply call a family member or friend.

My mother had numerous falls, refused to use her frame or a walking stick. She wouldn’t listen to anyone. Eventually she went into a nursing home because needed 24 hour care.
She had so much input from professionals, falls team etc yet ignored all advice.
just had to get resigned to driving over there any time of the day or night for the last 4 years of her life 🤷🏼‍♀️

There are possible alternatives to a falls alarm, eg pressure sensitive pads so you know whether someone has moved around the house, or a sensor so you know if they’ve made themselves a cup of tea. If nothing’s happened for a long time, they may need help. I believe some phones have inbuilt alarms, ie someone alerted if the phone picks up a sudden rapid deceleration as of a body hitting the floor. None of these is ideal, but they are an improvement on finding your elderly person on your weekly visit.

With my father, the best we could manage was his agreement to send me an email each day. If I didn’t get an email, I went round to check, He also had a Doro phone with a press button on the back - if he pressed it, it rang 4 family phone numbers repeatedly in succession until one of us answered.

See if you have a local carer support team, and whether it has a techie person.

Ah fair enough @MereDintofPandiculation it just highlights the lack of consistent services across the UK I guess!