Stroke Recovery Advice

[Derdu]

Hello,
My dear FIL had a stroke 6 weeks ago. For context- he was an incredibly fit, never in the house, driving busy 80 year old. It was a clot and a small bleed- a 7 on the scale of 1-10 of bad strokes said the consultant. It was touch and go for a few days. He thankfully made it through and incredibly- is home. Mobile, can dress/ eat, walk, speak and memory is great. We’re incredibly grateful- I’d say he’s 90 percent back to normal. The only thing is the slowness. As in- takes an hour plus to take tablets/ hours to leave the house/ eating takes so long it kind of bleeds into the next meal time. Getting him to drink a glass of water is painfully slow. There’s no physical reason for this as far as we can tell so it feels like it stems from his brain injury? I read apathy can be a symptom? If you weren’t proactive with him he’d sit all day in PJs not eating and drinking? Other than that he’s chatty and in good spirits and is phoning friends etc.

I don’t know what I’m asking really? Is this normal? Is there something we can do to help?

thanks if you made it this far x

6 weeks is early days in terms of stroke recovery. He's probably still very easily tired and his brain is still rebuilding connections.

My stroke afflicted relative was in hospital for 8 weeks and only allowed home once they could climb the stairs.

I’d say what you relate is perfectly normal. It’s a serious assault on the brain; the phrase ‘gather one’s thoughts’ is remarkably pertinent - everything takes longer to connect. And it’s frightening for the victim - they need time to come to terms with this sudden unexpected thing that’s happened.

My relative made a ‘good’ recovery - over years. We’re beyond grateful - so many stroke patients die, frankly. Let him get used to his new self, there’s no rush.

Thank you! It makes sense that everything’s an effort. I think you’re right- it’s almost ‘processing’ time and a lack of impetus. He’s doing so incredibly well- and we’re so thankful that the cheeky glint in the eye is still there. It’s just hard going for MIL who has to be at him so he doesn’t get dehydrated etc. It’s comforting to know that this is normal though. Thanks

I don’t know if you attended any of his psychology (I think?) sessions in hospital, @Derdu ? I did - and watched my clever, professionally competent, witty relative unable to trace a line over the left side of the page. (Maybe right, I forget.) It was fascinating, as well as horrifying.

Try to remember your father in law will never be exactly the same person he was before. He may live to be 100, but he will always be someone who has suffered a stroke. Which means some things will have gone from his brain and cannot be recovered. But the fact he’s gone home is hugely positive.

It’s so complicated isn’t it? I think perhaps we’ve been taken in a little by his astonishing recovery and that it has created unrealistic expectations. Human nature I suppose. Thank you x