Terminal lucidity in a dying parent- is this real?? What a headfuck!

[Ilikeyoursleeves]

My dad who we were told 3 days ago that he had lost awareness and had days to a week to live (end stage Parkinsons) has suddenly appeared to become lucid, talking (well whispering), asking for ice lollies and a cup of tea! He hasn't eaten for weeks and was barely conscious when I saw him 3 days ago. He was prescribed just in case medicines and his GP didn't give him long to live. He was also hallucinating and talking bizarre at times in amongst the lucidity though.

His presentation was completely different today compared to Thursday and it's a complete head fuck when I've prepared myself that he is about to die.

Has anyone else experienced this when someone was terminally ill??? Argh

@GammonAndEggs how special and very lovely that you got that time with your mum.

Another one coming in to say this could be a sign that he's almost at the end. We saw this with a family member (terminal cancer) - a sudden request for a particular food after weeks of barely eating, a flash of the 'real' him again for a brief period. It's normal and nothing to be afraid of. If there's anything you want to say to him, say it now. Hugs. x.

Thank you all for sharing your experiences, it's quite an amazing phenomenon but I can see how it must totally mess with peoples heads. Mine doesn't know what to think!

My dad asked for a yoghurt today and a protein drink! It's bizarre. On one hand it's nice and I liked the time I spent with him when he was lucid but on the other hand it's so damn hard when I'd convinced myself he was about to die. He has awful awful Parkinson's and is in the most hideous of conditions just now with less than zero quality of life so as each day passes it actually gets harder when he's still here 😢

My Dad woke up and started singing Don't Cry For Me Argentina 🙂, he wasn't really lucid, he was really talking to himself and it only lasted maybe 10 minutes.
He died 2 days later.
Sorry you are going through this, it's hideous.

My nana died at home of cancer, I told her I was having a pink gin and lemonade, she said I'd like one of those! She hadn't been awake for days by that point.

We spent a lovely evening all of us chatting and sharing a pink gin and lemonade , she told me she'd loved me since the day I was born 😪 and she died just before I got back to hers the next morning

I hope things are not too bad for you sleeves - this is hard on you.

As PP have said, it's very common for people to rally physically and mentally before they die. In my DM's case (also Parkinson's) she has been on 'end of life' care three times in the past couple fo years - the first time, amid all the 'end of life' bedside music and faff, she sat up and asked for boiled eggs. They have calmed down their response a lot at her care home because she's still with us.

Thanks @BinaryDot

He is still here. Still rallying. Not planning on going anywhere by the looks of things! 🎢🎢🎢🎢🎢🎢🎢

Sounds familiar. Let the professionals take the strain off you where possible and do stuff for you. Rollercoasters indeed!

@BinaryDot I have. I cancelled work when he had 'days' to go but now it seems that's not the case I rebooked everything and I'm just getting on with my life! I'll visit him as usual but I'm not sitting by his bedside or by the phone now, I'd go insane otherwise

Good, it's all you can do and you are doing everything - you need a life too and not to live in limbo!

Lewy body dementia which often goes with Parkinson’s is not like Alzheimer’s. Sometimes people with it can reason quite rationally.
I am sorry for what your Dad is going through.

My mum developed overnight dementia after a stroke and it felt like she was dying for months to be honest. Then suddenly she was lucid and hungry and chatting and told us it was the best day ever. She died a couple of days later and we cherish our last day so much. At the time we thought it was sheer adrenaline that suddenly made her lively and witty again like she used to be. Obviously it gave us too much hope but hindsight is a great thing. Now we’re just grateful we had one last glimpse of the real her - she’d been quite dementia laden for about three months and we missed her vibrant personality oh so so much.

I flew back to see my Mum, having been told, get back here asap. I arrived at the hospital, she was in a chair at the side of the bed with a cup of tea, chatting to the nurse. We had a few hours chatting, drinking tea and eating biscuits. She didn’t want her lunch and said it looked revolting. We laughed because she tried to persuade me to eat it. She then said she thought she would have a nap, and asked if I would be there when she woke up. I said of course, I wasn’t going anywhere. I left her for 10 minutes to get some food before the canteen closed in the evening, and in those 10 minutes she died. It was peaceful.