Hi wonderful Mumsnet community,
I'm looking for some help with my dear parents.
My mum has dementia and is disabled, requiring a wheelchair after an illness. After a long hospital stay, Social services decided she would be best located at home with 3 carers visiting her daily. My mum told social services she would only accept 1 visit a day and they agreed.
Since returning home she lives in her bedroom. Social services did put a starlift into my parents house but my mum cannot comprehend how to use it or what it does.
My dad has Parkinsons and is very frail. He can't clean and won't accept any support from me in terms of shopping or cleaning. I live abroad but have offered to pay and find some help.
My mum's bedroom is filling up with black mould because of the lack of cleaning and i guess something more structurally wrong.
I've tried to raise to social services that this is a terrible situation. That my mum would be better in a home, that she would be trapped in a house fire. That she can't phone for help, so if my dad falls, he will be stuck wherever he had fallen.
They've said they can't do anything because my dad isnt under their care and my mum has capacity. I know my mum doesn't, she had no idea where she is. Anyway, they said I could reach out to a local charity for some shopping help.
What can I do? They are so vulnerable ☹️
Social services won't help
Lovelycookbooks · 02/05/2023 07:19
Hi wonderful Mumsnet community,
Louisetopaz21 · 02/05/2023 20:56
That is not quite true, a court of protection application can be made if she is at severe risk. It sounds like your mum needs her care package reviewing and if her mental capacity is in question they should be completing a mental capacity assessment.
Oldermum84 · 02/05/2023 07:47
Yes, request a formal mental capacity assessment. But bear in mind that SS can't just put her in a home even if she lacks capacity, if she won't agree to go.
LadyGardenersQuestionTime · 02/05/2023 07:58
I’d consider putting in a safeguarding referral - just google, it will be the council and they will ask you all the relevant questions - both your parents are at risk but especially your mum. Emphasise the cleaning and your mum being unable to use the stairlift.
Their local Age Uk may have a home help service (paid for).
Are they self funding or council funded for care? Do you have power of attorney for them?
SocialLite · 06/05/2023 17:17
It is correct in a way to say that the social workers can't just force her to go into a home as it would have to go through DoLs, in exactly the same way that the children social worker can't just remove the children – it has to go through the court system, and only a judge can order that.
Unfortunately, mental capacity is an incredibly complicated area, and it is barely ever as simple, as saying someone does, or doesn't have capacity. They may have capacity for one decision, one minute and not the next for the same decision, they might always have capacity for some kind of decisions, and never have capacity for others, or they might have no mental capacity to make decisions at all – but that would be incredibly unlikely.
I would be requesting an assessment under the care act 2014, and very specifically highlighting that they need an assessment of mental capacity.
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