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Elderly parents

Respite/convalescent care - how to find this?

5 replies

undergroundstation · 22/03/2023 15:23

I'm hoping that those of you who are further along this journey can give me some advice.

My parents are in their early 80s, and until recently have been pretty healthy.

My mother has now been in hospital for a month recovering from a stroke. This is going ok: she's mentally fine, but she still can't balance/walk. So there's some way to go there.

My father is due to have ankle surgery at the start of April (this is being done privately, was the NHS delays are appalling and he's already lost such a lot of fitness/strength as a result of the NHS falling to diagnose the problem for months and moths). He's going to need 2 weeks when he does pretty much nothing, and then he's going to be in a boot for 6 more weeks (no driving).

I am assuming that some form of residential respite care is likely to be best for the first fortnight (? is this right??) but what about the later period? I suspect my mum will be discharged at some point in that period, and he just won't be able to care for her on his own.

Honestly, I don't even know how to think about this or anticipate what might be needed. What do I look for? Are there agencies that might (for eg) be able to find people who would like a live-in but part-time housekeeping/minor care/gardening job?

OP posts:

thesandwich · 23/03/2023 18:29

Contact your county council adult social care team- there may be info on their website. Also age uk.
country cousins offer live in care- home instead are a national franchise.


isthewashingdryyet · 23/03/2023 18:34

We used Country Cousins. They were fabulous.
not cheap, but worth it for peace of mind.
you do need a spare room, for the cousin.
but the care was fabulous


undergroundstation · 25/03/2023 10:08

Thank you v helpful. Have found an all-in option to start off w (they will need quite a lot of care for a while) but will hope to step that down (hmmm… I know how unrealistic that sounds…)

OP posts:

EmotionalBlackmail · 25/03/2023 17:45

Mine went into residential care for a fortnight (self-funded, she chose it herself in advance of op) so all meals etc provided as there was no one else around to come to the house, which was quite isolated.


shellyleppard · 28/03/2023 23:20

The hospital that discharges your parents should organize a care package before discharge. Would it be worth talking to social services/doctor/ age concern about getting some extra help? Good luck 🍀

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