Getting elderly parents some help

[Marcie101]

Hi my mum has Parkinsons and my dad is in his 80s and they both live at home. I live 200 miles away and have a youngish family which means it can be hard to go and give them the help they need.

Specifically we are looking to find them someone who can help with driving on an ad hoc basis over evenings and weekends. Someone that can drive their car. And eventually someone that can help them more and more and maybe move in to help with cooking and showering etc. but we aren't there yet.

I have no idea where to start looking. They are based in Manchester but presumably there are companies that offer such a thing all round the country? Or am I dreaming?

Anyone got any thoughts of where I can start my search?
Thank you xx

Could you advertise in thier local area for a part time assistant?

If you go to the Care Quality Commission’s website you can look up Care Agencies in their area. The CQ. Is helpful because it shows you the rating of each agency.

www.cqc.org.uk

There are also websites for hiring carers privately. Particularly as you are initially not looking for a big care package.

I think Care.com is one

Also, Age Uk offers some good advice in this area.

Hope that helps.

If they can’t drive any more why not sell the car and use taxis? Many taxi companies can manage wheelchairs nowadays. Or they could use the local voluntary car services. It’s a wrench but I suspect that would be easier than trying to find someone who can pop round and drive their car on an ad hoc basis (and there is the insurance to think about too).

For personal care like cooking and showering you can advertise for private carers or use a care agency.

Agree with @LadyGardenersQuestionTime - my parents used a volunteer taxi service for the GP visits etc. My dad also had a visitor who drove him in her own car to go for a walk. Someone being insured on your parents’ car seems too complicated.

Cooking wise, meals on wheels is great, they bring in hot food and plate it up.

Have they asked for this? You may have good intentions but would they be willing to do this?

If so their local gp may be able to help with a local contact

My friend a former carer does this. A cross between driver, cleaner, companion, gardener. She charges £18 an hour which is a very reasonable self employed rate as she has to fund her own holiday pay/ travel between clients. Tends to do an hour every day or two hours every other day.

Id advertise privately first for an assistant. I’ve found agency carers will shortchange easy clients as they are often running behind.

What do they think they need? If you haven't already had this discussion with them, you need to do that first.

If they want additional help then for transport your LA may well have one of the "taxi" services which can be booked for this type of purpose. Meals on Wheels may also be useful. For anything else it sounds like you want general household help and cleaning rather than caring at the moment - advertise locally and if you still have contacts in the area try a recommendation.

When it comes to actual care work you need someone properly registered and qualified but this doesn't necessarily mean agencies. We found local independent carers who gave a better service and worked in an informal co-op (covering each other for hols etc). The advantage to this was local knowledge and seeing the same person at the same time every day, rather than agency staff who did shorter visits, variably timed visits and were constantly changing staff.

Contact AGE Uk. They will be able to advise what is available in the area where your parents live and also advise re any benefit entitlements that can apply for.
I live at the opposite end of the country to my very elderly parent and found Age Uk help absolutely invaluable

If you contact your local county council they often have lists of accredited and registered self employed carers the website takes you too Here2Help and SmallGoodStuff so you could just go direct to those websites if you wanted