My sister has been struggling with caring for our terminally ill, mostly bed-bound, mostly incontinent mum. She is not quite in a state to go to the hospice yet, but has recently been allowed morning and evening carers. This would be a tremendous help to my sister who has been caring for her for months. But mum is refusing them... She is frequently confused, frequently asleep... She has always been very selfish and manipulative (financial support demanded from my sister and massive emotional support, both over decades, really taking its toll on my sister)
Now she tells the carers to go away, she doesn't want them, she's fine as she is...
How has anyone else managed a situation like this?
So as not to drip feed, mum has moved in with sister, I live 200 miles away but had mum for 3 months recently plus several week-long support visits to help. This is destroying my sister and me. Mum has always been difficult, but now her awful sense of entitlement and constant nastiness is even more upsetting. I get that illness causes loss of control and anyone would resent that, but she seems to resent us and the other people trying to help her and us.