If you have a relative with Alzheimer’s- cards and letters etc?

[ApexPredator]

Sorry if this sounds like a trivial question - I am trying to gauge what is best/nicest/least troublesome to do

My uncle moved into a care home a couple of months ago; his Alzheimer’s has progressed to the point where his family felt it would be safer for him. I am not close to them but was close to him as a child and used to write at Christmas and birthdays with cards and photos of the kids etc which I know he enjoyed

I am not sure whether to still do that (I haven’t seen him in the flesh for about five years) and was concerned it might be one more point of confusion for him, and one more thing for his family to explain to him and so on. Do families in this situation usually want to be having those conversations or is it less stressful not to have to do it?

Apologies if I’ve worded any of that badly. I don’t want him or them to think he’s been forgotten but then they probably don’t need more things to think about? Thanks

It sounds a lovely idea and I'd still do it but maybe speak to his family first and find out how he is and what the arrangements at the care home are, when my aunt was in care you were encouraged to send letters and care parcels etc., the home took in and sorted all the residents mail and for the ones that needed it a carer would open it with them and explain what it was if needed, then arrange them nicely in their room for them. But I can imagine with short staffing and so on not all homes would have the time for this so you might be better to send the card to the family then they can take it in for him when they next go to see him?

Thank you @maxelly - that makes sense. I have no idea how these things work but it’s helpful to think it through like that

Most people send the cards to me and I take them in to my mum and open them for her. She isn't really interested in the cards as such but seems to be very touched to be remembered.

I had this with a friend from church. I sent it to her husband. Although it was addressed to the wife who had dementia it was really communicating with the husband as well - news he would be interested in. As it went to his house he could decide whether to take to the care home and when.

I think it depends. Not all dementia is the same. My father enjoys cards and letters, even though he can’t read them any more (he was able to up to quite recently) Most of his Christmas cards go straight to the home. Make sure any pictures have clear definition - visual perception declines along with other brain function.

I had a lovely email from the manager saying that one of the carers reads my letters to him and that it was a “lovely shared activity “ for them.

Thank you all - it’s really helpful to hear your experience and ideas

My mother's dementia is very mixed, so zero short term memory but can talk about other things. She's still living independently but I suspect won't be within the next year (to contextualise my opinion).
For me personally I would absolutely welcome anything that gave us something to talk about as we have no new topics of conversation at all. So banal daily chit chat and happy photos of kids would be really lovely I think.