If you are happy with your choice of care home - tell me what they do right?

[janx]

My mum has been in a care home for nearly a year - she is funding it through her savings...so not cheap! We had very little time to find one as the hospital where she was being treated were trying to discharge her back home although she was not able to live independently anymore and care package was not enough. We visited this one and it seemed lovely - clean etc

Over the past year we have had numerous communication problems with staff and have become very frustrated with them. Lots of changes in management has not helped. Recently we saw the inspection report and it was pretty depressing and upsetting and their rating has moved from good to needs improving. My mum has dementia and so we don't always get a reliable picture of what is going on with her.

I wanted to get some idea of how you find the care home - do you get regular updates from staff? Do you have a robust way of contacting manager or staff if there are concerns? We are thinking of moving her but worried that will disrupt her and is there any guarantee that somewhere else will be better.

Would love to hear some positive stories!

My mum went in for respite in July when dad was taken to hospital. He passed away in sept and mum is having to stay there.
it’s not what I’d want but the staff are what make it.
she’s warm fed and cared for but they go the extra mile.

My dad has been in care for 18 months. The staff are so good to him, he eats well, they do activities and they were brilliant in getting him brought back from hospital when his care there was not that great. He likes the staff and has a lovely room with ensuite bathroom.

It's not cheap but he is well cared for and we have no complaints about his welfare.

Mum is clean and nicely dressed. I made it simple by making sure she has a lot of plain coloured skirts and tops (long and short sleeves) and cardigans so it's all mix and match but they also add little touches like a pretty scarf or different slippers depending on what she is wearing.

Some of the staff have been there for years - one lady started working there 24 years ago and says she will not work anywhere else - the staff are happy and secure.

We have seen several members of staff showing genuine affection for the residents - sometimes even hugging or touching - not in an inappropriate way but the way you would hope a close friend would. For instance I was watching the carer bring mum out of the house and down to the seating area for a visit. She came backwards over the slope from the door so with her back to us. She stopped and reached round to tuck the blanket around mum and bent and kissed her on the top of the head. It was the sort of natural interaction you would expect from someone who genuinely cares for somebody.

In the summer we would be outside as often as possible. Going home would often coincide with break time and there was an area by the kitchen door where the staff would sit during their break. I was very conscious that they were on their break and didn't want to disturb them but as we walked up the path to the house they would come across and speak to us and ask mum if we had been looking after her and joke with her.

On one visit not very long after she had moved in we went to visit and she wasn't wearing her skirt - it was over her legs so it wasn't instantly apparent that she wasn't wearing it - it was only evident when I went to tuck the blanket over her. I was a bit taken aback but it was at a time when she was prone to undressing herself anyway. Knowing that and knowing that the staff knew we were coming I felt that they had probably put her skirt over her quickly because we were coming rather than taken the time to dress her. They knew we would see her like that so they weren't trying to hide anything - there was nothing to hide as far as they were concerned. We didn't address it with the staff because it felt like a non event.

We have never seen her in clothes that don't belong to her and we have never seen her dirty or dishevelled. She may have food stains on her clothes sometimes but that isn't a problem to me because I know at home she would take off her clothes after every meal if she could because she wanted to be clean and I would argue that there was no need to add to the washing pile!

Mum is in a nursing home with a matron and several qualified nurses. I have never had a problem talking to a nurse - I haven't needed to speak to the matron specifically but all the staff, including her, will stop and chat as they pass through the dining room when we visit.

You have to be able to go in and visit at different times. Don’t set up a routine - keep them on their toes. When my dad was in a nursing home round the corner to me I popped in almost every day but they never knew when I would be in. If you are worried install a hidden camera in her room.

A family member with dementia was in a wonderful place. It was the simple touches like brightly coloured corridors (easy to recognise) , pictures on room doors etc. I also thought that the activites manager was great, not only did they take people out to interesting places .. but they took time to find out my relatives interests and previous hobbies and arranged activities around that , rather than just churn through a dull easy to manage list

mum has recently been admitted into a care home and so far so good. Staff seem kind and caring and nothing seems to phase them. Mum has later stage dementia as do a lot in there so quite challenging. They encourage her to sit in the lounge and join in with activities in her own way.
It's a dementia care home an older style one so not all singing all dancing but her room and ensuite toilet were spotless and smelt fresh
She also looked clean and tidy someone is always available to speak to you and if not they always ring you back. Its nit an all singing all dancing push one but they wouldnt take her even though she is self funded so shame on them really
Yes so far so food. I would advise nit necessarily going for the posh ones with all the extras cinema beauty parlour etc as they dont seem to care or want them when they get beyond a certain stage also they are more money for facilities they are not likely to use in the later stages

Open door policy and residents are treated like family.

No bad smells, lots of laughter, regular sing songs round the piano and the food. Oh god so much food (all home cooked too).

Forgot to mention the smell - or rather lack of it! There is no unpleasant smell at all. Also the chef puts on amazing parties for birthdays.

Nursing home. Excellent manager. Things she’s done to support my dad - see through blinds for window for an illusion of privacy in the day, “contract” for staff to sign before showering him so he’s confident they won’t move him awkwardly, touch sensitive bedside light now switches are too difficult for him…” She’s usually at the end of a phone, and often around in the dining room, talking to residents in their rooms etc.

I don’t get regular updates, but manager and staff will always talk if I ask.

Good manager is reflected in low staff turnover and visibly happy staff, who all know my dad, and who always talk to him when they see him.

Visiting at any time, no booking required, no restrictions. They prefer not meal times for those residents who eat in the dining room, but my dad has always preferred to eat in his room. They go to some lengths to accommodate his food preferences.

No fixed bed times and getting up times. If dad doesn’t want to get up yet, he doesn’t.

Home is rather an elderly building, dad’s room is small and not en-suite. But facilities are much less important than staff

It's specialist. They have a psychiatrist who will medicate properly.

Tbh that is the main thing. They really try within difficult limits of all sorts to give the residents some sort of life. They are really affectionate with DM, they love her. But mainly that medication.

My dad is in a nursing home. In Wales at least the NHS pays for the nursing care provision so it costs him the same as a residential home. Dad wasn't managing to care for himself at home and even 4 visits a day from carers probably wouldn't have been enough. Ironically, the care he has had from the home means that he would now be strong enough to go back home - but that would only last for a while realistically and he is very happy and settled where he is. Dad was concerned about going into a home as there would not be many other men and everyone would have dementia. Both remain true. But as I pointed out to him being one of the only residents the staff can chat to will have its advantages - and that is true. He thrives on being cossetted!

I only had a few days to find somewhere but chose this place along with Dad's reluctant agreement as he had heard Bad Things. They said I could visit a few hours after ringing for an initial enquiry. the place was clean, quiet and did not smell. There are several different rooms to sit in - including one without a TV, and no expectation of having to join in things. Dad mostly eats in his room. I read the reports and there were only minor issues. I think its important to look at a home based on the reports and what it is like now rather than even a few years ago. The people that warned Dad against this place so unhelpfully have had to acknowledge it is very different than it was 5 years ago.

one of the best things was the Matron ringing me just after he moved in and saying "you don't need to worry. We will care for him and love him now. We will let you know how he is but he is in safe hands". For someone who lives far away that was amazing and a real burden lifted.

there is open visiting but also you still have to do a Covid test and mask up which is good. And when my uncle visits they feed him lunch as well!

The staff all the way for me. We were so lucky with the staff at my mums care home, they treated her like one of their own relatives, so kind and caring.