Constant criticism

[DPN]

My mother is 70. Over the past 18 months I noticed a series of odd behaviours and I began wondering if she is perhaps going senile. It's not so much a forgetfulness. It's a series of odd behaviours here and there.

Today, I had my first day off work in 8 days. I decided to discuss with her Christmas and Christmas presents. We have family living abroad and we usually send a Christmas parcel. I found something online that would be suitable for one of my siblings abroad and its a box set. He would absolutely love it but it is expensive. I thought because of its price maybe me and her can go half/half with it and it would be a Christmas present sorted then for him from me and her.

All she did was criticise the idea and find fault in it all saying things like 'if you spend that much money on one person you will have to spend the same money on everyone'.

She knows Christmas is coming and she knows the last Christmas posting date will be the first week of December and she has nothing done.

Usually sitting down doing online shopping as well with her is usually a nightmare because she doesn't know what she wants or what to send.

I found a box set and she didn't like it and then I found another item for another person and I think it would be suitable and she doesn't like it and all she did was criticise it. It shouldn't be this hard.

You have my absolute sympathy as my M is very critical. Unfortunately though it's always been the same.

If it's a bit of a personality change that's more worrying.

It might be time to talk to her about LPOAs for Health & Finance and to see if she will go to the GP about her memory.

Huge handhold from me and let us know how you get on

that doesn't necessarily sound like dementia, esp as you say it is usually difficult with her.
it could be just a clash of personalities; maybe she finds you annoying or controlling, and doesn't want to co-operate on principle.
why can't she sort her own present-giving out.
if / when she does develop dementia, it's important to remember that it's not her fault.

also, this is an extract from Healthline,
Today, “senile” is generally considered an insult and is not used except as part of archaic medical condition names.

The more accurate way to refer to natural changes of aging, especially those related to mental and intellectual functioning, is “cognitive changes

If she’s not doing the shopping herself because she can’t, it may be frustration at the loss of autonomy.