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Elderly parents

McCarthy and Stone rent or buy?

32 replies

urgen · 01/10/2022 00:25

Whilst we aren’t quite there yet isn’t it a no brainier to actually rent in a retirement village. Thinking of my 90 year old Mum. She walks with a frame outside the house but otherwise ok.

I hear so many horror stories about people who buy whose family struggle to sell them when the old person passes on. That and the maintenance charges.

We would have to sell her London house and then fund the rental through the equity.

OP posts:
Orangesare · 01/10/2022 00:28

I think it depends where they live in the uk.
i live in the north (affluent bit so house prices are really high) and retirement property takes ages and ages to sell. A relative owns a retirement flat in southeast and they sell like hot cakes. It is close to the town centre though.

msbevvy · 01/10/2022 00:32

I live in the southeast and I see the same retirement properties advertised for sale for years. I would choose the rental option for that reason.

kitcat15 · 01/10/2022 00:33

They actually go down in price every time they sell round here in NW

Whatevergetsyouthroughthenight · 01/10/2022 00:33

Rent. You are liable for the service charge until you sell and there are way too many second hand retirement flats on the market. If your DM needs a full time care home in future, you might struggle to pay for it with her capital tied up in a flat you can’t sell quickly. There were some McCarthy and Stone ones where my DF moved to that were reselling for tens of thousands less than they had been purchased for. Have a look at the development you are interested in (if not pretty new) for previous sold prices on rightmove/zoopla or see if you can find a similar development nearby.

urgen · 01/10/2022 09:14

Thank you all. Just what I thought. Renting sounds the way to go.

OP posts:
DreadingWinter · 01/10/2022 09:58

Avoid. My DF bought a flat in one of these blocks 30 years ago. He absolutely hated living among all elderly people. One week there were three wakes in the communal lounge. He sold at a tiny profit, but had to pay one per cent back to the freeholders. He moved to an ordinary home with mixed age groups and was much happier. The retirement flats still sell for virtually the same as they did when he bought his. The monthly service charges were as high as a mortgage. I'm glad, OP, that you have decided against.

Toooldtoworry · 01/10/2022 10:01

Definitely rent. I'm South East and my Nans friend owned one before she died and it took her daughter 3 years to sell after she passsd, and she had to reduce the price significantly to get it to sell.

MereDintofPandiculation · 01/10/2022 10:38

Definitely rent at that age. I was looking into renting when me dad was still relatively independent - doing his own shopping but struggling with cleaning and getting in a mess in with medication. He then had a sudden (almost overnight) decline, on to 3 carers a day and nursing home 3 months later. It’s frightening how quickly needs can change at that age.

worriedniece · 01/10/2022 12:28

Rent

Bedsheets4knickers · 01/10/2022 13:11

I'd rent aswel , I'm saying that as an employee.

Coastalcreeksider · 01/10/2022 13:17

My friend had to sell her mum's place when she died. It took over two years and she still had to pay all the considerable charges on the retirement flat until it was finally sold.

Was a nightmare for her and caused considerable stress at the time too.

Renting would be a lot less of a problem I think.

cashmerecardigans · 01/10/2022 13:31

Definitely rent. My mum is in similar and it's such a relief to know that maintenance isn't her issue. She no longer wants that responsibility. Also she recently has new carpets put in and needed the doors altering. I was surprised to find it was covered by the maintenance contracts, so no cost to her.
I've heard similar stories of them being a nightmare to sell too.

urgen · 02/10/2022 09:05

I have just seen the development. It’s not a brand new one although a few new units have been built. You can see how it has bedded in and I was very impressed. It’s clearly a very well kept scheme and the host told me they have a fierce Housekeeper who keeps everything sparkling.

Its definitely an option and it’s nothing like a care home. Mum would need to sell her house but she has some savings which would keep her going whilst the house was going through.

So now to decide how the hell to bring it up with her.

OP posts:
urgen · 02/10/2022 09:08

The two beds were huge. Nearly 900 sq ft. Might need to consider a 1 bed as it is probably big enough. Up to her of course and the difference is £650 per month is significant.

Thank you everyone for your input. They suggested rental too based on her age and circumstances.

OP posts:
FlatOutAgain · 02/10/2022 09:30

I agree with rent. We are being pushed from the rest of the family to move mum (alzheimers) and dad to a retirement home of sorts. We have the LPoA and are digging in by saying no. If they move and dad (very poor physical health) dies either during the process or shortly after then mum will have to go into care and we have a property to shift that we already know wont be going anywhere for a while and with the maint charges it could be a disaster. We could be swayed to rent and this thread has confirmed what we were thinking so thank you all.

urgen · 02/10/2022 10:22

Flat. I didn’t see anything during my tour that would help a dementia patient. You are living on your own although there are some communal areas. There is a big difference between a care home and the over 70’s retirement type villages including the price!

OP posts:
Chippy1234 · 09/11/2022 21:26

Could I chip in here. Are there any legitimate websites where I can see relevant retirement rentals near me? Not interested in buying as parent is just too old.

Chippy1234 · 09/11/2022 21:27

Money is not an issue.

Badger1970 · 09/11/2022 21:52

We rented for my Dad. Incidentally, he's been in his flat for nearly 6 years and it's been on the market the entire time. It's the ex show flat, in the back of the building with a lovely view of the gardens and very quiet so if any flats there did sell it'd be his! It did worry me initially as they only offered a 6 month contract and told us it was for sale... needless worry!

Chippy1234 · 09/11/2022 22:31

That is interesting.

We just wouldn’t want to rent and then have to leave once sold. Having to have viewings etc. Definitely what we don’t want to do.

Sentimentaleducation · 09/11/2022 22:36

Chippy take a look at this website: housingcare.org/

Anna713 · 09/11/2022 22:44

My 90 year mum is currently living in a McCartney and Stone apartment she bought about 5 years ago (from new) and she loves it. It's been the best thing ever for her. Even if we struggle to sell it when she passes away I would not regret it because she is happy there and gets lots of camaraderie from the other residents.

MereDintofPandiculation · 10/11/2022 11:06

Even if we struggle to sell it when she passes away I would not regret it because she is happy there and gets lots of camaraderie from the other residents. Would she not get those benefits by renting?

Mischance · 10/11/2022 11:16

What has changed that you feel you need to suggest to her she should move when she is 90? If she is managing OK then it is probably better to leave things as they are rather than uproot her. I worked as a SW with the elderly and it was not unusual for such a major upheaval as moving to disrupt the person's well-being to the extent that they went from coping to not coping. Some became confused as nothing was familiar and everything was in a different place. Some simply become depressed and throw in the towel.

Do not underestimate her attachment to her home, even if it might seem impractical to you.

It sounds as though she has all her marbles is mobile indoors and is coping. Is there really a need to suggest to her she move?

There are lots of things that can be done in her own home - a lifeline pendant, aids and adaptations from the LA via their OT - moving should be an absolute last resort. Personally I think it would be wrong to even broach the subject with her. When, and if, things change, or if she brings the idea up in any way then you will have this info ready to hand; but I think you should leave her be. She may be old but she is living her life her way.

Chomolungma · 10/11/2022 19:23

Buying worked well for my in laws. They owned a property (mortgage paid off), and it made much more sense to sell it and buy one of the retirement flats than it would have done to sell their existing property and then pay rent for years which would eat into the money they sold it for. I guess it depends how long they stay there for though.