How to deal with scammers real and imagined

[Tintackedsea]

My mum is suffering from short term memory issues. She has always dealt with bank accounts, bills and anything online so dad has absolutely no clue. Increasingly she is either falling for, almost falling for, or thinking she has fallen for scammers and getting into a big panic. How do we help her?

What's the best thing to do about passwords?
When do you need to arrange POA?
How do we protect her?
How do we do this all without upsetting her?

This is all so sad.

I moved all of mums money, apart from a couple of thousand into notice accounts. I gave her a copy of where it all was, but I set up and keep the passwords safe at my house.
We have applied for POA but this basic step has provided most protection. She has cancelled her credit card and only has a debit card.
Re passwords.........I give up. On my gravestone it will say "it was the passwords that did me in".

My mum was actually relieved when I took charge of it, which surprised me.
She has had calls from scammers, now she just tells everyone "I can't touch a penny without my daughter agreeing". They give up pretty soon. Scum.

We found using a credit card safer than a debit as you could actually get it refunded if a scam. There is some protection but with a debit card once it’s gone it’s gone.
Also persuaded DM to put answerphone on landline and only pick up if it was someone she knew. This was a bit hit and miss tbh.
I took over all banking and left her with a credit card and I would deliver a small amount of cash weekly.
these scammers are bastards. Although I managed to cancel and get a refund from some scam Australian Lottery they she had signed up for!

Passwords - password manager. One long password for the password manager which automatically generates separate passwords for each application you use.

POA - Now! You can’t set it up if she doesn’t have capacity, so sort it as a matter of urgency. You don’t have to use it until you want to. You can also set it up so it can be used while she has capacity, so you can do things like look after the big stuff and leave her an account for discretionary spending so her exposure to scammers is limited.

I think spider’s solution of notice accounts is a good one, provided there is still some easily accessible emergency money

@MereDintofPandiculation is password manager an app? Could you explain a bit more? Could make life easier all round!

Sorry, Ive never used one! Basically an app which generates then stores (presumably encrypted) a password for every site you use, so you don’t need to remember the password . You protect the password manager with a password - and because you now have to remember only one password, you can make it longer and thus less easy to break than you would otherwise.

I’ve benn considering using one as they’re recommended as the safest way, just haven’t got round to it. Certainly safer than the other ways people get round the memory problem - short passwords, using the same password for several sites, etc

I'd thought about password manager but I think she'll get confused. She's not always using the same device to access things. Also she presses the wrong things and accidentally changes stuff or archives important documents. I'm worried she would delete the manager app or forget the password for it and we'd be in a mess.

I like the idea of notice accounts.

She's got loads of accounts with bits of money. She's been paranoid for years. In someways it's good because she's will never be able to accidentally give away all her money. It's confusing though. She is never in a million years going to accept me giving her pocket money either.

I will gently broach the notion of POA.

Dh spent two hours of his day off today sorting out her broadband and her email and her mobile. He's broken.

I raised the idea of POA by saying truthfully that she would still be making the decisions but it meant I could do the legwork. That's how it worked for a while before her stroke.