Temporary respite care - options?

[lulu51]

Hi all

Long story short - my dad is a full-time carer for both my mum (debilitating MS) and my nan (Dementia). They had their house modified and extended to make it more accessible for my mum and nan and to prevent my nan having to go into a care home for as long as possible - my dad was always very active, travelled for work etc and I know and can tell the stress and situation is taking it's toll on him and he needs a bit of a break.

Normally I would be the one he calls on for a few hours/day off but would love to organise & pay to take him away for a couple of days, thinking bucket-list Iceland for 2-3 nights, all being well, plus it's a good excuse for me to go!

I don't know where to even start to speak to or look into respite care for the few days or even what the options are...does anyone have any experience or advice?

Thank you x

No real advice re respite as my mum went from being totally dependent on me, into hospital and then into a care home but I wanted to say what a brilliant daughter you are.

My understanding from talking to a friend who is looking for respite for a parent is that if you are paying yourself you can ring round the homes and ask if they have beds available for respite. I know there is an entitlement to respite care but no idea how to access it. I hope you get it sorted and you and your dad have an amazing break together.

You can call your local authority adult social services department and request scare needs assessment for your mum and nan. They should also offer a carers assessment for your dad. Tell them he needs respite.

@IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere Aww thank you, you made me completely well up! X

@Turmerictolly thanks for your message, will take a look that side of things and see what I can do x

No problem. My post should say request a Care Needs Assessment not scare Assessment! Too much Halloween stuff going on

Would it be easier to have a live in person for the time your Dad is away, plus a few days either side so your Dad gets an extra rest and reassurance that they can cope?

@Mosaic123 Thank you. I wasn't entirely sure if that was something you could do temporarily or not...definitely would be work looking into, especially with the two of them needing the help and care. X

Oh yes. We had a live in carer for my parents at one point.

It would work out cheaper than respite in a care home for two.

Lifted.com is one company that does such things although I haven't had experience with them

I looked into this recently and the home said they only did a minimum of 2 weeks, as more complicated due to COVID.

DDs MIL does this kind of thing, both privately and via an agency. She does longer stints with people, and then fills in the gaps with weekend/few days jobs. Ring round some private care agencies and see what they can offer.

Call your local authority adult social services team and request an urgent assessment. Tell them there is a risk of carer breakdown. From there they will assess your mum and your nan individually but it will highlight how their needs are met. If each individual is under the threshold financially (about 23k- doesn’t take property into account) then SS will organise. If they are above the threshold they can give you advise and point you in the right direction to organise and fund yourself. If you don’t want to do that, and wish to just art get yourself then still give them a call as they will be able to advise and usually have a care directory that could help in your search.