Care home preparation

[Snowsquonk]

Hello,

We are starting the process of moving my mil into a care home. This is something she wants to do as her progressing alzheimers is sometimes making coping with day-to-day life difficult. She also really benefits from company and organised activities which she hasn't had much of during the pandemic.

We think we have found a suitable place, she's visited and really likes it.

We've realised we know nothing really about the practicalities of moving her! So I wondered whether anyone who has done this can share top tips on what we could start doing now to prepare, and maybe anything that you learned or which took you by surprise which may help us along the way!

She is in the fortunate position of being financially able to fund her care through her pension and substantial savings.

Thank you!

When my DM went into a care home, all clothes had to be labelled, even knickers, socks etc., so you will need a lot of these. DM liked to wear skirts, so I got her elasticated waists ones as well as trousers as they were easier to put on. My DM was in a home for a total of 6 years, not dementia primarily but in a wheelchair and lots of new clothes went missing, so don’t buy expensive clothes. We never had to provide toiletries, but she had her hair done every week, I can’t remember how we paid, but think so much was put into the homes account. We were lucky that she was in a home a 15 minute walk away from my DF so he could visit nearly every day and take her out for a walk and a coffee. They also let him have his meals with her, which he was happy to pay and they let him go on the organised trips.

The home put on quite a lot of activities from trips out, they had their own mini bus to singalongs, indoor bowls and games etc. All residents were encouraged to come out of their rooms for activities and meals, but unfortunately not that many did.

Friends of mine DM is in a dementia specialist care home and they are really impressed with it. She has had to sell her home for her care, but it’s worth it for her getting the care she needs.

I was about to say labelling clothes too!

A cousin whose mother spent several years in a care home with dementia was so happy and well-fed there that she put on lots of weight (after having been very slim and weight-conscious all her life), so cousin found herself having to go out and buy new clothes on a regular basis.

What a helpful question! I am waiting for my mum to move into a home from the rehab unit where she has been since the end of June. I started labeling when she went into rehab and lots of the labels have come off now so will have to look for different ones before she moves.

If you haven’t already, consider setting up Power of Attorney. My MIL is in a care home, as my husband already had POA for his mother, it made it a lot easier for dealing with her finances. The care home invoices get sent to him, as he has access to her bank account.
Also, my MIL has put on weight since moving into the care home. Age UK can offer advice.

Check with the home first about labeling. I spent a long evening labelling clothes when Dad was discharged from hospital to a care home. And then they told me later that their laundry guy does all the labelling!

Find out what personal items she can have in her room and if they can be delivered before she arrives so it feels familiar. Eg family photos, pictures etc

Write down some information about her that will help carers see her as a fully rounded person - names of important family members, what she did for a living (if she worked), hobbies, places that are important to her. Anything that might be a good conversation starter for someone that's meeting her for the first time. I was also asked for some info about food likes and dislikes for the chef. (Not so necessary if she's perfectly capable of communicating this for herself, but can't hurt).

I also gave them a recent photo of Dad looking fit and healthy, as he was in a bad state when he was discharged and I wanted them to see what normal looks like for him.

Find out about visiting arrangements and if you need to book any slots.

I was about to say labelling clothes too

Here's a third vote for labelling. Even if the home are happy to do it, I would still label shoes and slippers.

Find out what personal items she can have in her room and if they can be delivered before she arrives so it feels familiar. Eg family photos, pictures etc

We prepared some nice framed photos and left a bag at the home for her the day before she got there.

We weren't allowed into her room unfortunately as it was the beginning of Covid-19 but the CH staff unpacked all of her things for her so it looked more like "her room" when she got there.

Write down some information about her that will help carers see her as a fully rounded person - names of important family members, what she did for a living (if she worked), hobbies, places that are important to her.

The This Is Mee* document is really useful for this and can be incorporated into her notes. Usually the Hospital & Care Home staff are only too glad to have it.

I also gave them a recent photo of Dad looking fit and healthy, as he was in a bad state when he was discharged and I wanted them to see what normal looks like for him

We put a few framed photos of DF in his room when he went into a Hospice. I wanted to remind him what a full life he'd had but also let the staff see what an utter force of nature he had been.

What will she have in her room & how can she personalise it? If she has an armchair for example, does she have a cushion she can take or a throw? We ended up getting my grandmother new bedding as she didn't think her existing stuff went with the curtains (she had a point!). Are there any shelves or a windowsill for knick knacks as well as photos? Is she allowed plants or flowers in her room?
What will she wear? How much room is there for clothes? How often do they do the washing? We got my grandmother a couple of bed jackets as she had her breakfast in bed most days. If it's really hot, layers can be good. We also got her some cheap necklaces and earrings as she didn't want to have her valuables in there as she'd heard they might go walkabout - which they did.
What does the room come with in terms of TV or radio? What about any laptops or anything?

Brilliant thanks - will find out about labelling. We already have POA in place.

We now have a list of questions for another visit later this week, thank you. keep the tips coming if you have more!

Let us know how you get on at the visit this week