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Elderly parents

What should I ask for? Who should help? What to expect?

27 replies

RentalsDrivingMeMental · 01/08/2021 15:47

I've posted in AIBU before about my elderly dad and got a mixed bag of responses (www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4204853-Unhappy-at-GPs-regarding-elderly-parent)

I'm hoping by coming on here I may get more support.

Dad is 87, unable to move around much due to arthritis in feet. He complains constantly of the pain. GP has in the past prescribed Naproxen and Co-codamol which cause chronic constipation, and the issues arising from that are in my first thread.

We've had about 3months of mum and dad just getting on with life, dad still in pain, mum still just about coping. Dad started feeling unwell a couple of weeks ago saying he felt he was dying, mum rang GP, GP suggested Covid test. Mum rang me up at work, so I rushed to theirs with my LFTs (I work in a school). Both tested positive, and PCRs the next day confirmed it. Mum (85) said it was like a cold, she just got on with it. Dad however felt wiped out. They finished isolation 4 days ago, so are able to get out and about and I can again visit (I too had to isolate).

Mum rang me in tears earlier, dad is still complaining of pain and that he is dying. I advised 111, but she said it's a recorded message telling her to go online. I go round and visit, just to give my mum a handhold. Dad isn't eating much, is drinking fluids, can't walk much other than to the loo and back. No interest in life, says he wants to die, the pain is all he can think about. He can't sleep. He's taking paracetamol and has pain relief gel for his feet, but says it doesn't stop the pain. GP has referred to a pain relief clinic. I have contacted SS to ask for a review of support.

What else could I be looking into to help support both my mum and dad?

OP posts:
Zolrets · 11/08/2021 22:10

@RentalsDrivingMeMental any joy for you? I’ve just got a distressed phone call from my relative in extreme pain so I’ve submitted an electronic request for a medication review Sad wish them/me luck!

MrsPsmalls · 11/08/2021 22:37

Could they or you afford a private GP appointment? Once something suitable is prescribed, the prescription can usually be carried on by the NHS. They can be telephone video or face to face.

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