Too late for POA?

[Its90minutestonight]

My dad has been diagnosed recently with Alzheimer's. Is it too late for my mum to get POA for him? If not, is this something she should do?

I think it depends If he is aware what he is doing. I did it after my mum was diagnosed, she was really forgetful but did understand it when I explained it to her, even if she forgot it later. Don't go through a solicitor just download the forms there are two one medical, one finance £65 each.

Oh and I would say you need the POA your dad, and do your mums while your at it.

He has to have the capacity to agree to it. And someone else to think he has.

We did it with my FIL and I think we only just scraped there. Did his will at the same time and I remember sitting in the solicitor's office thinking 'FFS don't say anything mad' as it had taken ages to get him to agree to the simplest of wills.

A month later and he couldn't have done it.

Definitely do it yourself online - it's even free if you are on benefits.

We did MIL at the same time - I think it helped persuade FIL that it wasn't just something for him.

And definitely do your mum and your ILs at the same time, don't get left too late again!

Thanks. Will do. Mum has long been resistant to me having POA for them. Thought I'd start with her getting it for dad, then she might come round.

The selling point for mum was me doing mine at the same time. If I trusted my son as attorney and I wasn't too young at 57 then she didn't really have much she could say.

Everyone is different and people receive their diagnosis at different times, it doesn't matter that you've got a diagnosis of dementia but it does matter that you understand what you are agreeing to. We had a huge scene when the paperwork finally landed because she had forgotten all about it and saw it as some sort of a conspiracy for me to get the house.

Would you like an example? Mum was doing some gardening, fell onto concrete, smacked her head and went from (just about) managing at home to a care home. That could happen to anyone, especially if they are on blood thinners. She can't pop out to the bank now but I could do whatever she wanted doing because I have POA. By the time you need it it will be too late to start the process, you have to get it in place ahead of time.

Yes get power of attorney for both mum and dad. Do the medical one as well. Don’t leave it. It will cause all sorts of challenges down the line. Tell your mum you don’t need to execute it immediately , but having it signed ready for when you need to do is best for everyone concerned. 💐

She can revoke it whenever she wants, by signing a deed of revocation, with a witness. Wording given on the government website.

If it's too late, you can do a longer, more complicated process to become a deputy under the court of protection.

My MIL was similarly resistant. What tipped her was asking who she wanted in charge of decisions about where she lived, what she ate, what she wore - her son and daughter, or some random social worker? It put it in context for her.