Mum has had 4 falls in the last week

[Ieatmarmite]

My mum lives in my sister's house and is never in the house on her own. She has become very frail in the last year; she is very bent and shuffles along using a walking stick. My sister bought her a walking frame and a 3-wheeled folding walker but she refuses to use either of them.

She fell in the kitchen last week and banged her head, she fell again in the kitchen on Monday evening but luckily fell into my sister who broke her fall - that seemed to have been caused by her getting her foot tangled round her walking stick. Yesterday she fell in her bedroom - she said she was plumping her pillow and it got caught on her mattress (?) which knocked her off balance and she banged her back as she fell back against a chair. Today she tripped on the garden path when I was with her and managed to catch her as she lost balance and went stumbling along the path.

My sister has been trying to persuade her to buy some supportive slippers for in the house (the sort with an adjustable velcro strap) but mum refuses to have any because they are "ugly and frumpy". We've tried to find "pretty,, feminine" ones for her but it's the velcro strap across the instep that she objects to as frumpy and "old". Walking up the garden path she was wearing her outdoors shoes.

DSis and I are both worried by this sudden number of falls. Part of the problem seems that she doesn't pick her feet up as walks and shuffles and slides along. We would appreciate any advice, experiences, solutions etc that mumsnetters with stubborn, elderly frail parents could suggest.

Has she been assessed by any falls professionals? Difficult to judge really as she sounds like she is able to make choices for herself and with that is able to make unwise choices. You could always check her urine. Often falls can be caused by a uti. Also think about getting eyes and ears checked too! As a last resort you could try to frighten her with facts and figures. It is more than likely than not the falls will inevitably lead to a significant injury, which may of course have significant baring on her future.

What Kazaa said. If she breaks her hip - which is likely - the statistics make grim reading - 1/10 chance of dying within a month, up to 1/5 chance of moving to residential care, ⅓ of people with a hip fracture die within a year. Oh, and it hurts too.

Can she get herself up if she falls? If not are you helping her up? Considered calling an ambulance? If she banged her head and is on some blood thinners she should be going in to hospital for an assessment. An ambulance crew/hospital may get the message across.

It’s an awkward relationship - some elderly people are very selfish, but we children find it hard to do tough love with “the grownups”.

May be totally wrong here, but has she been assessed for Parkinson's? My DGD would shuffle along, not pick up feet and trip a lot. He was diagnosed with Parkinsons but never developed the characteristic tremor.

Sometimes urine infections in the elderly can cause some strange and seemingly unrelated issues.

I think she could be referred to a falls clinic, where they assess her, too.

I think that falls clinic coverage depends where you are, in my mum's area they are not running at the moment. If you are referred after a fall you get a letter saying service is suspended and they'll contact you when things return to normal.

Speak to the doctor, it could be anything from a urine infection to an ear infection and it's worth giving them the chance to do something.

I'd speak to the GP to rule out a physical cause eg urine infection. Perhaps ring the GP tell them what's going on then the GP can ring/see your mum and assess.
I used to work for the NHS in a community roll and had lots of patients like this. Sometimes they would listen more to a professional than family (even when we were saying the same thing!)
The gp should also refer to falls team. Having a physio assess her environment and provide equipment to make her life easier and safer will be useful.
As someone who was independent and then became disabled and needing support I'd say its a process that you have to go through to accept help/adaptions - I refused for a long time to my detriment at times. Loosing independence is difficult to accept and if as many choices can be hers the easier it will be for her.
In the mean time your sister could look round the house and remove any hazards eg rugs, making sure nothing is left out, making spaces wide enough to walk through, making sure things are easy reach (no bending down/overstretching) etc..

My Mum used to have lots of falls (most of which she didn't tell me about). We asked Adult Social Services review her home and ask what changes we could make to "future proof" it for her so if she ever became ill we would have things already in place. They fitted handles and gave lots of advice. This gradually led on to other help - and the falls clinic via the GP. She did not want help - but doing it very slowly and using the "what happens if you're in hospital and want to come home we need things ready in place" persuasion and health professionals advice worked.

If there is no falls clinic and she has been reviewed by her GP I would be thinking of a physiotherapy referral. They can do an assessment and suggest strengthening and balance exercises.