Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Elderly parents

Me again - DM self harming

7 replies

DorsetCamping · 02/07/2020 13:17

Am so sorry for creating multiple threads on the challenges I've faced with DM over the last few months

To be brief she has multiple health conditions and has been admittted to hospital 4 times over the last 6 weeks. She has finally gone to a NH for respite with a view to making it permanent.

This morning the Matron rang to say they'd found DM this morning with deep cuts all over her arms.
It appears she'd brought a pair of scissors back from hospital and hidden them somewhere.
I am poleaxed! She has always been prone to low mood and negativity but nothing in this scale.
The GP has been called and I am waiting for a report.

I can't help but think there is some sort of connection with the 'mild seizures' she had durjng the longest hospital stay. The brain scan came back clear but all I can say is that she has been 'changed' since then.
She's like a truculent, obstructive toddler; won't cooperate and confused. She also had a varying hold on reality. Her eyesight has also rapidly deteriorated

I visited the NH this morning and through her window accused me of abandoning her, that she's been weeks (it's actually 2 days), that everyone is unkind and that 'something scratched her arms in the night' Shock
This is all so out of character.

When the nurse spoke to her about the cuts DM
just brushed it off and said her arms were itchy.
However, when I was cleaning her house the other day I found several scraps of paper with notes about how bad her life was, how much pain she was in and even reference to overdose.

Not sure what I'm asking if what I can even do but is it possible that the seizures brought on brain injury causing this behaviour?
Could it be some sort of rapid onset dementia?
Or is it just the culmination of being unwell and tumultuous few months?

Just don't know what to think or do. Am also anxious she will put her place at the NH in jeopardy.

OP posts:
Blueuggboots · 02/07/2020 14:04

It is very common for people with brain injuries to have mental health deterioration, yes.
I'm sorry for your difficulties with your mum. Thanks

Srictlybakeoff · 02/07/2020 14:13

Couldn’t see any other threads.
What age is your mum. Is it possible that she has dementia and the seizures and behaviour are part and parcel of this. You can’t diagnose dementia on the basis of scans. There are unusual forms of dementia that present with symptoms other than memory loss. I’m interested in your comments about her eyesight - is there some eye pathology to explain that , because again there can be difficulties with visual perception related to dementia that cause difficulties but are related to the brain more than the eyes

giantangryrooster · 02/07/2020 14:14

I'm really sorry to hear about your situation 💐.

I haven't followed your continued saga, but here goes Wink.

Not very experienced... But when my ddad fell, normal care staff, gp etc. weren't very concerned about minor head injury (bil was and questioned it (being an mri specialist) but with elderlies unless obvious, it is apparently not a priority) don't think dad had a head injury, but even the shock of falling change their behaviour. Anyways my ddad deteriorated and was admitted to hospital, he became mad as a hatter, it was delirium caused by pneumonia. He acted so out of character, saw things, didn't have any boundaries, became semi-aggressive.
A friend of ours' mother became delirious from lack of fluids, little nice old lady, she hit him, several times! Again lost her senses completely due to delirium.

Could it be this with your dm? UTIs, pneumonia and dehydration are notorious for creating it, but even lack of 'normality' can trigger.

If not could you ask her gp to get her an assessment for dementia and mh, up ads if she already gets ad. AND show/tell gp about the mh notes you found.

Sorry you are dealing with this, it's a shit situation.

TwoTribes · 02/07/2020 14:19

OP I think you would be better posting on your other current thread about your DM as it has all the history and all the advice you've been given so far on there. Plus the many people that were already supporting you are still checking in with you there.

Here

DorsetCamping · 02/07/2020 14:23

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/elderly_parents/3938608-dm-about-to-dangerously-discharge

This is my previous thread which pretty much covers the past few months.
There is a whole catalogue of 'minor' incidents which didn't seem overly concerning at the time but are now sending off alarm bells in my head.

OP posts:
DorsetCamping · 02/07/2020 14:25

Sorry cross posted
Yes you're right Twotribes. It just occurred to me that this might be a whole separate issue.
Will go back to original post

OP posts:
HappyHammy · 03/07/2020 11:38

Sorry to hear about your mum.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.

Swipe left for the next trending thread