Hi all i am new to this site and really need advice.
To keep the past short... I ended up being a carer in my early 20s for 5 years for my mum and working to keep her house and bills paid. I did absolutely everything without thinking twice.
When she finally got somewhat back on her feet benefits wise and medication wise i decided i need to be an adult with my own life.
For what's happening now... My mum texts or calls me if she needs something picking up or if she needs something ordered online (yes i pay for it and keep in mind i work 200 miles away from her) i call her every morning, but when a friend was here visiting she asked me to order something online and told me she'd run out by a certain day. The order didn't get delivered when they said it would and she called me. So i called the company and they said its delayed. (whilst I'm on the phone to company she has messaged asking me to call my friend to get her something from the shop) on calling my mum back i was stressed because I'm in the middle of something with my friend and also because the day she needed this item was the next day. Then my mum proceeds to tell me oh its ok can go another 2-3 days so when i picked her up on what she'd previously said (via message) she started shouting and getting aggressive with me saying she never said anything of the sort, i did state that i had it via text and all i got back was a snotty sorry but its not my fault you are tired from too many late nights and long days!
Two days later she's being curt on the phone still and not listening to how I'm feeling about her not doing things herself she completely attacked me down the phone so i screamed back but then she proceeded telling me I'm just being damn right nasty towards her and she won't put up with it anymore.
One day later lockdown maybe coming for covid-19 and guess who is as nice as pie to me on the phone to get me home...
Since being home she's barely done anything in the house cleaning wise maybe a bit of washing up and cook the rest of the time she's just playing her games. I've paid out over £300 for food/cleaning products since being home compared to her £30 shes spent. (I have no job now) Every day and all day she complains shes in pain but she manages when I'm not looking. She will just sit there feeling sorry for herself and complain shes tired. She Has sly little digs at me when talking to the dogs because she didn't want to do something and make me feel bad for not doing it.
Trying to talk to her about things she always plays the victim, or any conversation she turns it around on her. Everyone else is to blame.
She's so negative all the time.
I'm exhausted and feel so guilty about how frustrated and angry i am at her. She just doesn't seem to care how much i do for her and i feel like I'm being taken for a fool by my own mum.
Sorry this is so long.