Proposal that over 70s should be quarantined

[Fairyflaps]

Another unconfirmed leak but reported by Robert Peston on ITV.
Elderly could be quarantined for four months in 'wartime-style' mobilisation to combat coronavirus

For elderly and infirm people still living at home, but dependent an invisible army of younger carers, how can this possibly work?

They are deeply worried that some older people will simply die at home from neglect, after they are quarantined, so want to start the quarantine as late as possible - some time within the next five to 20 days.

Spoke to my 76yo fit, healthy and social mum this morning. She's quite simply said she won't be doing that, at any suggestion of self isolation.

She's even eye-rolling me for self isolating this week, even though it's clear that I'm poorly. She's being really entitled and stubourn about it all. It's very unlike her to think in an un-community minded way. But on this issue, she's only thinking about herself. "I'll take my chances" were her words. She doesn't get it at all.

It needs to be brought much harder to home to some. Use whatever will have impact on them - selfish, deluded, stupid, anti-British, anti-NHS, enemy or terrorist sympathisers, statistics, video footage from Italy, whatever.

—I cannot imagine for one moment my (bright, analytical, opinionated) 77 year old father meekly acceding to an instruction to stay indoors for four months—

My 78 yo DDad is refusing to self isolate. He’s still going shopping in town and remarking to me how quiet it is. Went out to the pub for a meal last night 🤷🏼‍♀️

What can I do? I’ve suggested isolation. But I can’t stand on his drive with a ram shield. He’s very much if my time is up then it’s up

Who or how would the country police this ?

I have a relative that lives several 100 miles away. They have no intention of staying inside.

They could come to live with me temporarily, but they probably wouldn't want to ( I still need to work)

My parents are 82 and 93. They don't do internet anything. I have 1 brother who lives close to them, but he always catches everything going so the chances are he won't be in a position to pop in/do their shopping. How are they supposed to get food?

@Lifeisdinky my mil died unexpectedly last week. My fil is heartbroken and staying with us atm. But we have a houseful of kids and schools are still open ATM so not sure what to do.

Plus we have to sort the funeral and not sure what to do about that either.

Whilst being in shock and trying to deal with everything else.

Over 70s and younger people in the at risk categories. That would be me, over 60 with heart problems and immuno-suppressed. I can't self-isolate for four months - I'm supposed to be at work!

If it includes those with chronic illness that's definitely DH (60, diabetes) and possibly me 50+, asthma). But we have two under-10s. Who's going to take them - they won't stay indoors for 4 hours let alone 4 months?

I think people should be allowed to choose quality of life over length of life. I can follow the logic of this but for so many people it will cause so much more suffering than it might avoid.

This whole situation is incredibly distressing.

they won't stay indoors for 4 hours let alone 4 months
Children have had to in China, since January, often in tiny flats.

Completely unrealistic. 75 year old triathlon friend cares for his mother who is 95 Who lives in next street. Him and his wife do everything for his mum. If he is not allowed to go and visit her then the state will have to provide 4 carers to visit every day. State is not going to do that.

@Beansandcoffee Then they move in together?

DM died a couple of weeks ago or we would be facing her being quarantined as well as us. DH is 70 and in good health, I am 61 with three serious underlying health conditions. We are expecting to have to stay put for months.

Children have had to in China, since January, often in tiny flats.
But we don't aspire to live in a Chinese style society and my DCs have not grown up in China. Both I and DH need to stay mentally healthy to stay physically healthy and two DCs (one with SEN) indoors for 4 months is not going to keep us healthy.
The Chinese schools have not been off for 4 months.

@drspouse. Do you think you are going to be healthy if you catch the virus? Get your priorities right.

I think a) we can't stay healthy and isolated for 4 months (we have at least one medical appointment per week between us) and b) keeping DS indoors for 4 months is a safeguarding issue - the worse his mental health, the more impulsive he's going to get and the more likely he is to hurt himself or someone else.
I suppose we aren't as badly off as his classmates at his specialist setting who live with elderly grandparents and are on FSM so won't get fed (as well as increased aggression), or similar teenagers whose elderly grandparents won't be able, literally, to keep them in.

As pp have said there are lots of risks to health for those having to stay at home, people maintaining their mobility by getting out, social contact keeping people going. Carers will still have to visit people at home.
I also have colleagues in their 70s..

My DM is in her mid-90s and lives alone several hundred miles from me. We have a system that just about works at the moment, of me travelling to see her, stock up with shopping, keep her company, see to any necessary chores etc, every couple of weeks. She has major health and mobility problems and can't leave the house so tbh she's already in self-isolation.

However - I now won't be able to get to her for months. Her neighbour, who is a big support and kindly does top-up shopping for her, is in his 70s and on his own. He will HAVE to go out and buy food, there's nobody else to do it for him.

I'm trying to come to terms with the likelihood that DM won't survive this.

@Evenkeel couldn't you have shopping delivered to your mum's neighbour? For him and your mum.

CuteOrange I've signed up for online shopping and I'm hoping other friends and a family member who's a bit nearer will also help out, but I'm very doubtful the neighbour will actually agree that he shouldn't go out. This is I'm struggling to get DM to see how serious this all is.

In her case I think the fact of having lived through WW2 (and serving in the forces) means she isn't quite grasping the current emergency - I suspect she privately thinks I'm fussing....

There are so many elderly people with dementia in UK living alone with a couple of care visits a day and supported by helpful neighbours - often themselves over 70 or sick.

If all these active over 70s self isolate and all day activities for the elderly are cancelled - what is going to happen to the those living alone with dementia?

Even with two, three or four care visits a day they will not be able to cope. They will not understand the need to stay at home and I fear they will be roaming the streets distressed, vulnerable and confused.

How are people coping now with this in effect? My widowed mum is now totally isolated, except for carer visits for medication, and has dementia. She often forgets to get dressed now and is very depressed and disoriented. I haven’t visited since lockdown. I feel quite desperate at the thought of this carrying on indefinitely- she’s in her 90s too so a year is a long time. I was wondering if it’s still possible to get carers to come and maybe keep her company or outings- or is that just impossible?

Hi aramox that sounds really hard. Dm is 95 and has carers but I also visit- live down the road and do shopping/ admin and lots of practical stuff for her.
She is suffering too- I would certainly consider paying carers to visit more and maybe take her for a walk?

Well look on it like this.

Either quarantine or infection and possible death.

People can choose, it is not a dictatorship here or an authoritarian regime (yet).

Make your choices and live or die with them. Up to you.

I know all this, have someone who is quarantined, drop off the shopping, do the facetime etc. They are coping, but many will not.

The standards of care for the elderly in Britain are abysmal. That is the problem, nothing else really.

Well she was actually coping ok with groups and people to see- it’s the isolation that’s awful. Would a carer be allowed to do more than the basics?