Black humour keeps us going. Dementia (and other) silly happenstances

[Theas18]

THe first one we had was very early in Dads denentia diagnosis 3-4yrs ago. He had a chest infection and was having rigors ( fever shakes). I arrived for a routine visit to find he'd been up all night and now was shaking so much in bouts that he couldn't drink eat/walk .

Called for urgent GP visit and they kindly came. Treated etc

After GP had gone Dad looked down and said the immortal line

" THat bloody doctor has stolen all the buttons off my dressing gown!!!!"

(as you can guess there never were any!)

DH went to visit MIL who is now in a care home. She asked him if he had a landlady to cook and clean for him. He rushed home to tell me my new jobtitle. (We've been together 17 years.)

Mum still loves to read, but still thinks she does. Her happiness that she 'keeps finding these books she's never read' is hilarious

Nana used to refer to dad as mums 'fancy man'. They'd been married 30 years and he was never fancy

Not a joke as such but I loved that when my grandma was too far gone to string a sentence together she could still sing along to all the old songs she knew. When she didn't know who her own family were she held my baby son in her arms really gently and put his dummy back in when it came out. How some spark came back, just a little, when my grandad reminded her about the holidays they'd taken together.

And when he visited her he'd take a small peeled orange and a small bag of chocolates. Like a toddler, shed refuse the fruit and just keep asking for more sweets :o

CMOT, we have the same thing with books. My mother "loves" to read. My brother was regularly sending her the best of new paperbacks. None had been read. I now have many holidays worth of reading material. Pity I have no time.

She goes out each morning to buy the Times. She uses it to know the day and date....

Dad has a kindle so he can always read- they are a godsend as you can increase the font and we have a light too. I'm sure he just stares at it now till he dozes off be it's great when waiting places .

Well untill I have to talk mum through undoing the button pressing he's done!

I think my mum does the same with the Guardian NeedMoreSleep. dad said to me 'oh, she still does the crossword and sudoku every day, cuts it out straight away'. Next to her chair is a pile of these - 6 months worth last week. All carefully cut out, and not a pen mark on them. He hadnt noticed that she just sat and stared at them.

Christmas 2011, mum did ds a stocking when we went to see them before christmas, and gave dh and I wrapped presents as well as ds. Christmas eve, I was annoyed with ds who had ripped the (non christmas) paper on mine. And then realised she had wrapped me a very elderly 'make your own ship in a bottle kit' and a tatty awful book. Dh got awful book and some v dubious sweets. We carefully unwrapped ds's present and substiuted something he might like.
Christmas 2012, I sent my dad things to wrap up for ds and my brothers son so it looked better

SOCT- I think music and song are very beneficial to those with dementia. I was surprised when signing some infantile type song to my youngesta couple of years ago, Dad joined in and knew the words. He'd never have done that 10 years ago. Also, he loves concerts and I take him whenever I can. Maybe it's because music dosn't make the same intellectual demands that other forms of entertainment do, is immediately enjoyable, and taps inot early memories.

David Cameron was at the end of Mum's bed yesterday morning apparently. If she is going to have men in her bedroom she could at least hallucinate someone decent.

It adds a new terror to dementia doesn't it - David Cameron of all people!

My mum seems to be losing her love for music. Though dads passion for Andre Rieu still annoys her, so she hasn't given into Strauss yet, though now she sits and watches them. They watch their preferred DVDs turn and turn about. Dad says if he watches any of the Coast ones again it will rot his brain

That's funny.

My mum seems to think Margaret Thatcher is still Prime Minster so David Cameron would still be in his prep school uniform, or in Pop with Boris.

Talk about terrible irony today.

Mum 'what are you reading at the moment (one of her standard lines)'

Me 'A Terry Pratchett'

Mum 'oh, never heard of them, will look out for those'

Shes lying on the downstairs bed, in front of a whole shelf of them...

StealthOfficialCrispTester: That has really moved me, and made me remember my mum.

Well we have hopefully avoided the "carry on film" type farce that could have ensued tomorrow am....

Mum has a sigmoidoscopy to have. In the post arrived a little enema bottle " use 2 hrs before arrival" appointment 8.30 so 6.30 am!

However, she's 85 and partially sighted so I'm not sure sticking something up her own bum is actually possible- and followed by hobbling along the landing as fast as she can to the loo- with dad following repeatedly asking if she's alright because "I love you so much" ...and then trying to get them both showered and dressed ( and achieve continence again fr a 20min journey) ..... Nope not going to happen!

I just said " call them and say you can't do it and see what they say" and of course they'll do it when she gets there, but she was so mothered about it.

I do despair sometimes of the thought (or rather non thought) process that goes on - theres no joined up thought to say 'oh, this lady won't manage with the pre care, so we'll send info to get here early'. Or to hold onto a patient a bit longer so they are certain to be continent after (this was mum after hers).

Funny I was just thinking about my dear old gran, she died 16 years ago tomorrow. She was adamant that she had diabetes, despite the test showing she wasn't. She announced that dr Hilary jones had landed on the back lawn in his helicopter and told her she MUST have a cup of tea with five sugars every 15 minutes, which she would make, then promptly pour it down the sink as it was too sweet, luckily she didnt have much concept of how long 15 minutes was, so she only did it a couple of times a day. Bless her, I do miss her.