Hi there - I am hoping someone on here can help. My mum is not all that elderly, only late 60s, but for many many years she has been "odd" and "difficult" in her behaviour and I have always had to tread carefully round her as she has been prone to getting in sulks, not speaking etc and takes offence very easily. This isn't just me, btw, she is downright horrible to her partner and has fallen out with all three of her sisters.
She has had problems recently with her eyes and at one point it looked as if she might lose her sight in one eye. However, her recovery has been brilliant and she can now read newspapers, sew and knit, go on the computer etc. There is one question mark about whether she can drive again or not.
This year, my mum has seemed to get very low moods a lot of the time. She is extremely irritable and prickly, and takes offence at the least comment and will storm off and not speak. She is unkind to the children and makes unpleasant personal remarks to them and is then offended when I ask her not to. She gets odd bees in her bonnet and gets very upset and emotional about things out of all proportion. She criticises me to the children behind my back. She is very erratic in her moods and behaviour - one day (well, one hour, really) she is fine, the next she will not speak. She has odd religious notions and gets very caught up in issues of forgiveness and sin. She sleeps at odd times and does not eat properly although she drinks a lot. I have heard off other people that she makes odd, probably drunken phone calls and also that she argues with and is very critical of her partner in public. She has said that her life is not worth living if she can't drive (she only used the car to drive a mile into town anyway) and that nothing in her life is worth anything.
She has fallen out with her sisters about my late grandma's estate and takes actual joy in things that go wrong in their lives, including serious illness. She is very vindictive and spiteful and makes some astonishingly callous comments.
It is very difficult to be around her and most people that know her are backing off rapidly. I have tried to speak to her several times about going to the doctor but she won't go. She admits to having SAD depression and usually goes on anti depressants over the winter but won't admit that there is a problem at the moment.
I am very worried about her and if things carry on she is going to end up very lonely. For the first time I can recall in over twenty years, her partner has spoken to me about how difficult he finds her behaviour and I suspect that he is very close to calling it a day with her, and I can't blame him. I try and offer a listening ear, practical support, company, but just get rebuffed every time. She flatly refuses to go and see the doctor. She needs more help than her partner or I can give her but unless she will see the doctor I am at a loss as to what to do. I can't stand aside and watch her slowly self-destruct.
I have phoned my aunty about her this morning and my aunty is also very worried about her and has noticed many of the same things. However, she does not live close by and so can't be of much practical help.
Can anyone offer any help, or hope?