...Another worrying Year One parents' evening

[minko]

DD is in year one of a supposedly very good Catholic school. We went along to an open evening earlier this weekend ever since I have been worrying about it. She is OK at reading, though her writing is pretty dreadful. She writes the first letter of a word or perhaps 2 or 3 letters from each word, there are no spaces and it's just indecipherable.

However it's her maths that is most worrying. She is in a 'springboard' group to try and get her to catch up with the others in the class. The teacher says she often cries because she can't do it. She said usually another child will report that DD is crying as the teachers can't watch everyone all the time (there are 30 in the class). Anyway, they try and explain things one-to-one at the end of the lesson with DD when everyone else is in playtime (I'm sure that then all DD can focus on is her embarrassment.)

It seems to me that the school is so set on reaching targets (they assess the kids every 3 weeks), that those that fall behind are gonna stay behind. I made up a number chart for her to see if I could help her over half term and she doesn't even recognise the numbers in 12-20. So no wonder she can't do addition.

I am so angry, frustrated, worried I don't know what to do. Change schools? The teacher really had NOTHING positive to say about DD and that is so upsetting (along with the idea of DD crying at school). And the whole emphasis was on numeracy and literacy with no mentions of anything else she might be good at.

Hi Minko, I really sympathise. My ds is in year 2, he is left handed and only now writing in a way that can be disciphered, so I am sure it will come. I had a problem with maths at school, I remember crying when I found it very difficult. Your dd needs to work at her own pace at maths, and the teacher should be trying to build her confidence. Is it worth making an appointment to see the head of year or headteacher to emphasise how you are feeling? The teacher should be saying positive things as well, and doesn't seem to be putting things across to you in a helpful way.

Has the teacher written an Individual Education Plan? My ds is special needs due to his handwriting and needing help with his social skills. If they haven't felt the need to write an IEP she must be in the normal range of ability, it just sounds like the teacher is not emphasising the positive.

Oh dear! I would make an appt with the teacher, go and see her again, and tell her how worried you are about your dd being unhappy at school. Tell them that english and maths aren't the be all and end all, and that you are concerned that your dd is feeling the pressure. And that you are worried how this will effect her future. I would be very concerned if my children were crying at school frequently, because of lessons. I think this is deeply depressing state of affairs.

I'm suprised that a religious school is not promoting a more holistic philosophy of education, but then again I went to a really poor C of E primary school that was very results led. I think in middle class areas these schools can be very competitive (survival of the fittest) And not all children respond to this, or enjoy that educational atmosphere. I hated my primary school because of the pressure to succeed. Mum and dad bit more clued up when choosing secondary school, which I loved.

Could you afford a nice tutor for your dd, so that she could be given the encouragement and support that she needs, outside school?

1. Go and talk to the school, if no joy from teacher, go higher to discuss issue. 2. Consider looking for good tutor once a week. 3, Re - think if school is suited to your daughters personality.

By the way I have a degree in Nursing Studies and I am a qualified nurse now.

I wouldn't be too bothered about the writing. Ask the teacher to confirm this, but very likely OP's DD is far from worst writer in the class.

If it were my DD I would start an intense programme of getting her to recognise the numbers 12-20. That achieved, I'd move on to add one or take away one from each number (so 12+1=13, etc.).

Good luck.

I would definitely talk to the teacher again - I know it can be difficult to get the chance sometimes as they always seem to be surrounded by other parents before and after school! Is there a parent liaison or SENCO co-ordinator who might be more easily available? At my DCs' school they have both and I initially spoke to them when I was concerned about my DS. I am sorry the teacher has been so negative - is there not any other support in the classroom - teaching assistant etc? Although my DCs' classes are not officially streamed, they do seem to put them in little groups according to ability - could you ask if they do the same where you are? Although I am not very experienced at this, they might also set up an IEP (Individual education plan) setting out some indiviual targets for your DC. It's definitely a good idea to ask the teacher what methods they use in numeracy - for example at my DCs' school they have a number square they work with, from 1-100, with 10 rows of 10, it really helps them learn their numbers. Good luck

Yes, I'm definitely going back to see the teacher after half term. I also want to speak to the springboard teacher too. All the questions really only formed in my head after the parents evening. In the 10 minutes you get on the night you can't really discuss much.

They have groups of 6 for literacy (and all other subjects) and separate groups of 6 for numeracy.

I'm going to try to help her with her numbers over half term and seeing just what her grasp of numeracy is. I didn't realise things were this bad.

To be honest I feel a bit let down by the school. I'm very willing to help but really isn't teaching their job?

My son who is dyspraxic had similar problems in year 1. He could not grasp numbers at all. Numbers are abstract and certain children just do not 'get' what they signify without anything concrete. I had to use beads, rods etc to do any form of calculation with him. Number lines just did not help, he used to miss numbers out or start/stop at the wrong ones.

You need to talk to the 'springboard' teacher and see what methods they are using. Sometimes these kids just have not grasped the sequencing of numbers, how they get bigger and just what it all means. It is very difficult for parents (like myself) to understand and have patience with their difficulty.

Games with dice are also a very useful way of learning.

Thanks notso-lazymum. I've been doing addition using a dice and a bit number line today. She seems to get that and seems bewildered by how easy it is. I think she just hasn't grasped the concept of numbers really...