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Calling all day-school chorister parents!!

13 replies

mumtoaledjones · 25/01/2009 22:29

Hello there,

I am a regular, but have name-changed so as not to be identified (or to identify my DS) in RL.

DS (6.8) has a choral audition at a day school in a month's time. We have a good idea of what to expect, as he's had four pre-auditions, including one at this particular school. Although it's by no means certain that he'll get in, all four music directors at the various schools (three of them being the top boarding ones for choristers) said they would eat their hats if he didn't. (I will only be convinced if and when he's actually offered a place, though - I fear the competition will be very stiff!)

If he were to get in, we face a big decision (not least as it means moving cities). One thing that I know nothing about - and would love advice about - is what it's like being the parent of a day-school chorister, and what it's like for the sibling(s).

DH and I are both at home all day (although he claims he is working), so we are both available to drop off/collect children.

Maybe I should think up specific questions? Hmm...

  1. How does it work with staggered picking-up times? I'd be picking DD up at 3.35 as I wouldn't want her to have to stay at school just because her brother's a chorister. Is it better to live within a short walk of the school? (Sorry - that sounds like such a daft question!)
  1. Exactly what kind of commitment is involved? DH and I are both happy to commit to chorister life in the abstract, and realise that our weekends/holidays will be fully booked (not that it matters, as we never go away!) but it would be nice to have a more concrete view of it!
  1. Do the benefits to a child of being a chorister in your experience outweigh any potential down side? I have deliberately never gone in for organised activities with the DCs on the grounds that I feel they need to learn to occupy themselves (and that their school days are already quite long enough). Would this be a huge culture shock for DS? He is already doing long days at a prep school followed by a horrible amount of homework - but being a chorister would obviously be much more demanding.
  1. Do choristers still get time to bum around and be children despite the demanding schedule?
  1. Uummmm... There must be heaps of things I've not thought of!! Please let me know what they are!!

I would be so, so grateful for any advice from MNers who have been through or are going through this...

OP posts:
KnickersOnMaHead · 26/01/2009 01:39

Message withdrawn

twentypence · 26/01/2009 03:58

I know two men who were choristers - both boarded. One of them lived on the same road as the school and still boarded because it was "easier".

mumtoaledjones · 26/01/2009 09:27

Thank you!

The school we have the audition at does not take boarders (I don't think boarding would be right for our DS or for us as a family, hence we are not pursuing any of the boarding options) - though I'm sure it is easier in some ways!

OP posts:
twentypence · 26/01/2009 18:22

If there are no boarders the workload is likely to be more realistic for day boys, lots of opportunities for lift sharing with other parents etc.

Dottoressa · 26/01/2009 19:34

Bumping as I am also interested!

Judy1234 · 26/01/2009 19:47

My children's father worked at a cathedral and so we knew quite a bit about life for teh boys (and they did not board). It certainly meant in my married life we didnt' get Christmas or Easter as a family. I certainly remember all those Christmas eves dealing with small children alone and then present wrapping whilst he was outa t mid night mass and then the next morning etc....

But from the child's point of view they had a great time and singing makes you happy anyway. Children get used to what is their own norm. I never wanted my chidlren educated differently from eacn other however so I suppose I would not have wanted what you will then have.

We did have three children a different schools to age 18 but nothing to do with music although they all got plenty of grade 8s, sangs etc in the schools they went to. That was manageable. You just need a good dairy and we both worked full time but had help.

ICUP · 26/01/2009 19:48

a DAIRY as well?
BLIMEY - milking must present problems..

ShinyPinkShoes · 26/01/2009 20:21
Grin
Beetroot · 26/01/2009 20:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

twentypence · 27/01/2009 04:24

3? Beetroot I am in awe.

I can ask some of the choristers in the school where I work what they think if you like.

mumtoaledjones · 27/01/2009 08:32

twentypence - that would be very kind. Thank you!

OP posts:
twentypence · 27/01/2009 08:41

We're not back until next week. I'll keep you posted.

mumtoaledjones · 27/01/2009 09:33

Thank you!

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