do you think that if schools were able to concentrate on social skills rather than ofsted results..

[stoppinattwo]

we would ultimately have children who performed better all round?

Im talking mainly about primary schools, early learning years, but think it would also apply to older children.

My DD has come home tonight talking about her targets for this term...she sound like a bloomin wall st banker!!!.

I would much rather she learnt to be a good loser, win graciously, be polite, be thoughtful..the list goes on. A lot of the thinks that are sadly lacking a lot in society today. I believe that education is important obviously, as a measure of what we are capable of but why does there seem to be such a rush to hit all kinds of target. My daughter isnt the quickest learner, and she is probably below average in her class but Im not really worried about it, she has taught me so much about what really matters, because I have had to sit back and think "right do I push her to catch up, or do i let her take her own pace" (much to the schools disgust). The teachers are under so much pressure to achieve they send so much home for DD to do in the way of activities intended to get her reading better and writing better. I dont do them with her simply because I believe that after a hard day at school she should be allowed to chill

I just think that schools have lost the point tbh (i dont mean teachers and HT's you understand - i think they mostly do an admirable job) I just think that the focus is quite wrong....what you you think?

And the training in taking turns etc started in playschool. Can't imagine that there would be many teachers who allowed a free-for-all in the classroom.

But obviously it is very hard to instil social manners into a class where a majority of children are not getting them reinforced at home.

Things like taking turns- surely that is something we practise every time we take a toddler to the park. Or talk about when we take him on a bus. Waiting until he gets to school seems very late to me.

I think a lot of the trouble is that however much the school works on manners (and schools do!), it is not going to have a lasting effect if it is constantly being undermined by the active behaviour of the parents.

I know parents who shout at their children for not saying please, but who are consistently rude and loud and lacking in manners themselves- they're not going to be raising perfectly mannered children, and there is only so much the children's teachers can do.

Good points.

I can ensure (practically) perfect behaviour/manners in my classroom most of the time - but I can't control what they do when they leave my room!

I jsut think that everything is too results orientated...and I feel for the teachers, school and the children (obviously), and us parents....we all want the best for our children, but personally speaking, I dont want the best school for my children, I wnat a school where they come home having had a great time and learnt stuff .

My Ds goes to cubs atm, there is no bullying, they all listen, they all respect and they all learn good stuff. Im not for one minute comparing a cub scout leader to a teacher...Im comparing the environment and the ability for learning life skills...he has learnt so much in the past year at cubs.

I think I used the wrong phrase initially as everyone is concentrating on my reference to social skills...what i meant was, learn about things that will be useful as well as learning how you "fit in", and what sort of a person you are. What do our children know about themselves

I once popped into the classroom when my DS was in first term of year 1. I was shocked to read the piece of paper on his desk which said something like "I can write using adjectives".

At this stage there were probably only a couple of children in the class who could actually read the word "adjective" let alone understand what an adjective is.

I feel that at this stage the children should have been concentrating on improving reading skills and learning to actually write their letters and words rather than being constrained by thinking of adjectives.

This term (yr 2) I have seen the phrase "conjunctives" used in homework. Is this the correct word or should it be conjunctions? (maybe I should go to pedants for this?!)

I don't remember learning all these grammatical words so early. I think they used to say things like "describing words" instead of adjectives in the early years of primary. All I can remember from early primary in the 70s is writing weekend news every Monday morning. I don't even know if this is routinely done these days as they seem to have such an action packed schedule.

To answer OP I think social skills are important. I feel that my DS is acquiring these at home and school. I don't know how much ofsted affects the day to day running of the school (apart from when an inspection is due).

I don't think your DD should be given too much homework. If she needs extra help in any area the help should be given by the teacher or TA during the school day.

janeite - yes, that was me!

Well, have they done this week's SEAL H/W? Have they? Have they? Did you ever contact the head to tell him/her what you thought?!

I think a lot of people told the head what they thought!!

We have a new head now. As yet, he hasn't hectored as much. He's sent out a questionnaire to ask what we think of the school. And he's set aside time for parents to have appointments with him, at - wait for it - drum roll, as this is almost unbelievable - a range of times convenient for working parents!!!!

Unfortunately I think SEAL, citizenship, PHSE etc make too many demands of schools which already have an over-stretched curriculum and therefore they end up having knee-jerk responses and heads try throwing pieces of paper at each initiative, in order to tick a box and say they've addressed it.

You make a goo d point, jane

I went into a school to teach music (voluntarily, my ds was at that school but he wasn't in my group), I spent 90% of the time working on social skills (my group didn't have any) and we got to the music for around the last 5 minutes.

Maybe if I'd had them for a whole year once I had got them to interact civily we could have done some music...