School friend concerns

[Empress]

Our child started school last Sept, knowing nobody, & seems to have made mainly one 'best' friend, who seems to spend a lot of time criticising her, being rude etc, & we think she should be encouraged to make friends with others. we spoke to the teacher who didn't seem to be aware of the issues at all, & got nowhere. as we don't know any of the other parents, its hard to make connections with the other kids. we've put in a lot of effort into inviting others for tea etc but people don't seem to be bothered, I guess they have their own circles of friends. Feeling quite down about it, worried for dd & tired of always being the ones who have to make all the efforts. (Feeling bit sorry for myself!!sorry!)

It's still early days - the winter term goes quickly getting them settle, then its harvest festival, halloween, bonfire night and christmas parties/concerts etc etc Maybe by the time the summer term, and every-one is bigger and they can play outside you'll probably start getting the invites.
I'm guilty of not returning visits - as I work, my girls always seem to be going off to friends, and I try to arrange return visits at weekends - which is when their friends are doing ballet/swimming etc etc

If its any consolation it took my dd a couple of years to widen her group of friends. So I'm thinking she'll always have one or two best friends rather than a wide group of friends. perhaps she plays with others at school but never mentions them??

Don't get disheartened, just give it a bit more time

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Could you widen her circle of friends out of school, maybe ballet lessons or gymnastics or Rainbows. I found that my dd spent most of her reception year with one 'best friend', this friend was quite territorial of dd and did not like dd playing with anyone else. She was very reliant on dd to the point that she cried every day when we were away on holiday - fortunately, the school noticed this and they put them into separate classes in Year 1 - her social circle has grown incredibly since September. Give your dd time, I think reception kids tend to play with who they know (i.e. Mummy's friends kids) but as they get into Year 1 they start to make up their own minds who they like.

This will get better again I started to get to know other parents when the children all started having birthday party's.Offer to go on the school outings if you can,join the P.T.A ,help out at school disco's all good way's to get to know the other parents and children.
I must say though my son is still attracted to the class bully and sulker.We have never said anything to our son we are just gently still encouraging him to play with others.Having children for tea e.t.c. It has been two years now and some children are just a one friend child so I know your concerns we just have to keep on trying.
We are starting to wean him off.It's amazing the power this child has over our son and the others in the playground