does your PTA have a disciplinary policy for events?

[robinw]

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Can you find out what the head said before talking to the mum - she might have already said something. Did any-one tell the older girls parents what happened? I guess it should have been recorded in the accident book as well.

At our school we insist children aren't left alone. You're right in thinking there should be some-sort of policy even if it echos the schools.

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sorry Robinw- misread you- its a question of whether to tell the monsters mother rather the poor girls. If my child had been cruel to another -than yes, even days later I would like to know ....what's going to change to prevent it not happening again. Not any easy subject to bring up though.

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robin, How sure are you that the head would turn a blind eye and not tell the boys parents because the incident happened out of school time? I think if this had happened at my son's school, the head would have said something tothe parents. After all it was a school event (even if it was via the PTA), and took place on school premises.

Don't know your head, of course, but do think it would be worth talking to him first to see if he has informed the parents. All he has to say is yes, no or 'can't tell you that'. Then you can decide if it's worth taking further.

If you decide to talk to the parents, could you just say that there was some disturbance involving the boy and the head had to intervene. Say you didn't witness it, but if they want to find out more, why don't they speak to the head themselves?

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hmm it's a diffuclt one, robinw. You said earlier that the head took the boy away after the incident, so he must know something happened, and you say the girl's mother knows but probably won't take it up with the boy's parents.
To be honest I don't think you can do much more about this particular incident if you feel a direct approach to the boys parents is not possible.

If you feel pta events are increasingly violent and unruly, could you get a meeting organised to agree on a set disciplinary procedure, backed up by the teachers? Then send out a letter to all parents stating the procedure, and also say that pta helpers will in future inform parents if children misbehave badly. You say the boy's mother is involved with the pta - could you make a special point of inviting her to the meeting?

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Hope you agree on something at the next PTA meeting. You never know, it might also make the make the head a bit more active.