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Original poster

As a parent, how would you react to this?

103 replies

eflabb · 04/09/2008 18:20

Bit of a long story, but we have just returned from abroad and started my son in Year 1. Where we lived (don't want to say the country name because of school identifying us), primary doesn't start until 7, so my husband taught my son to read, write etc at home. He is also bi-lingual. My husband is a retired ex-teacher.

He has done extraordinarily well and is reading ORT 10 books now, with little difficulty. Comprehension is excellent. He is a real little book worm. I spoke to his UK school about this before we came over and was told by one of the teachers that she personally wouldn't countenance Reception children reading above Level 5 during the Reception year. I comforted myself with the fact that she wouldn't be teaching him, and he started school this week.

On the first day, I was called in by his teacher to a meeting with her and this other teacher. To cut a long story short they wanted to take issue with me claiming that he could read level 10 books. His reading was, quote "all over the place." There were "large gaps in his reading" and "I mean (she laughed and threw her hands up in amazement) he couldn't even understand what a title was." He had, according to this woman, been "sped through the levels" by us to a very advanced level that she claimed he could not function at. And approaching unknown words by sounding them out was apparently "not appropriate" at this level. She apparently felt "sooooooo sorry for him being tested in this way."

Her tone was very dismissive and sarcastic (but lots of smiling at the same time).

Suffice to say, she would now start him on Level 6 (note her position on children only being able to reach Level 5 during Reception, so the way I see it, she is positioning him according to her set ideas as to the levels children can achieve during a particular year).

When we got home he read his school book in about 2 minutes flat and told me how great school was going to be because he can do it all.

I've had my head in my hands over this. My husband just stared at me in disbelief when I first told him and got on the net to check out other schools (which all seem to be full now).

What do we do?

OP posts:
morningpaper · 04/09/2008 20:55

Starting school is very hard for parents and it is easy to misinterpret teachers - I certainly found myself feeling very defensive during the early weeks and very annoyed with the teachers - BUT DD loves school and even though Reception was very much Noddy stuff, she really loved it and by the end of the year everyone had settled in - including bristly parents (myself included).

LittleBella · 04/09/2008 20:56

I agree with Twig. I imagine she is young.

In 10 years she will look back and cringe at the way she responded to challenges from parents.

Unless of course, she is 50 and on the point of retirement and is simply an old bat.

bozza · 04/09/2008 21:07

mp child is starting in Y1 though.

Original poster
eflabb · 04/09/2008 21:13

After a long silence tonight, have just spied husband surfing private school sites!

OP posts:
mrz · 04/09/2008 21:16

As a teacher I would not want to assess a child's reading ability until they have had time to settle in my class and feel secure and confident in a new school. If your son is reading ORT 10 I would suggest letting him pick suitable books that have a more interesting text and will be more fun for him to read at home.

morningpaper · 04/09/2008 21:19

oh yes sorry is year 1

well I REALLY wouldn't worry then

just read a book at night and he'll get through them really quickly, if you are worried about that

alternatively if you have thousands of pounds that you want to throw at the problem for the next 20 years just because your first impression of the teacher wasn't very good, then LUCKY YOU

Hulababy · 04/09/2008 21:21

TBH I don;t think private schools will be much different in terms of doing things their own way. It is all teacher dependent, rather than school dependent.

DD's prep school is very reluctant to rush them through "levels", more so than many state schools I know of. DD's schools approach is very thorough, using range of schemes and a range of texts, and really focusing on other aspects rather than just the decoding of words.

S, do be wary about just swapping schools for that reason alone.

georgimama · 04/09/2008 21:26

This sounds exactly like what my mum got from primary school teachers each time one of her three children started school. "You haven't taught him to read properly" she was told. We could all read, teachers didn't like it. End of.

ChacunaSonGout · 04/09/2008 21:27

eflabb v v v similar to our experience which left me in tears after ds's first day in year one on tuesday

dp and i have decided to totally ignore school and continue with ort at ds's level at home as we have been

sinkingfast · 04/09/2008 21:28

I've read this thread and reread the OP and have to say, I agree with Twiglett. Maybe he didn't read at all well in school and they were raising eyebrows, having put him with a very advanced group on your say-so, and this was their clumsy way of saying they were going to move him to a level they felt was more appropriate on first meeting (and were actually being pretty good at communication - our school would have just done it and not told you). It really doesn't sound like a biggy to me - it's day one and if he's bright, it will shine through and he'll be treated accordingly.

Tell your DH to step away from the computer

ChacunaSonGout · 04/09/2008 21:31

i have a few children and CLEARLY remember similar issues with ds1 at this age

he got ten a* in gcse this year so i stand by my convictions

Twiglett · 04/09/2008 21:34

don't know if it helps but DS spent last year (year 2) reading books from level 7 or 8 to chapter books ... but not sequentially .. one day he'd bring home a chapter book .. next time a level 7 with some notes from teacher saying "this book is a great jumping off point to discuss emotions / road safety / whatever" or "read this and get DS to write me a poem on feelings if he'd like to" etc

scanner · 04/09/2008 21:34

So a reception teacher who presumably has lots of experience of teaching children of this age is wrong and you the biased mother are right. .

georgimama · 04/09/2008 21:36

Often, scanner, yes. I had a reading age of 16 point something daft at age 8, teachers had an issue with this because it makes their class more difficult to teach if they have to cope with numerous levels.

MadBadandDangerousToKnow · 04/09/2008 21:38

I agree with Twiglett, Clam and Sinkingfast (and many others).

It is far too soon to be locking horns with the school - especially as they may quickly reach a different view of your son's reading (or anything else) - and, frankly, very rash to be combing the web for private schools on the basis of two (I think) days' experience at the current one. You really do need to wait and see for a while - not least because the most popular private schools are likely to be full and you may have to wait until January or even September 2009 to get a place.

ChacunaSonGout · 04/09/2008 21:39

georgimama how refreshing to hear that

sinkingfast · 04/09/2008 21:39

Tbh I would have been surprised if OP's son had performed at his best on his first day at a new school. Maybe he clammed up totally and read really badly?

Chacunasongout - exactly. Fretting at this stage about what sodding reading level your children are on is pointless.

ChacunaSonGout · 04/09/2008 21:45

in our case the teacher requested we did not read ort books with our ds at home....she said he read confidently but struggled on various words quoting 'parent' as one!! he is 5!

LittleBella · 04/09/2008 21:51

scanner I'm assuming that the teacher isn't very experienced, otherwise she would know how to communicate with parents in a more effective manner. (OP hasn't confirmed that or not)

And the OP's husband was also a teacher.

But shock horror, biased mothers are sometimes better able to judge their children's abilities than a teacher who has been acquainted with their child for a couple of days. I wouldn't take any notice at all of anything a teacher said about either of my children until she'd known them for a few weeks and had had some time to formulate an opinion based on more than a few hours in a new class.

ChacunaSonGout · 04/09/2008 23:06

i find it odd that the teacher in ops case and my own is slightly confrontational before even meeting parents for first time

ninah · 04/09/2008 23:21

Agree with mp about the difference between reception and year one, everything you said -that was me and ds!
As for op, agree with those who say give it time and reassess. Early days.

arfishy · 05/09/2008 00:28

I would be more cross by a teacher treating me and DS in this patronising way than the reading thing I think.

I think she clearly believes she knows better after seeing your son for one day. She will soon realise she is wrong and will hopefully learn from it.

In the meantime carry on at home.

DD started school able to read but was put on a much lower level. She soon got accelerated through and I used that time to improve her confidence, comprehension and expression.

DD still seems to read better to me than her teacher (who is a lot a little humourless) so there probably is still a slight disparity in what we both believe her ability is. In the big scheme of things it doesn't matter.

I would however keep a very close eye on the school to make sure it isn't a little inflexible everywhere else, that would matter to me.

Twiglett · 05/09/2008 09:29

Primary teachers (particularly the young ones) are by nature relatively patronising though, actually they're either patronising or really nervous when talking to parents (particularly eloquent, intelligent grown-ups) .. they spend all day working with small children and have limited experience outside schools .. I am surprised you're surprised

Twiglett · 05/09/2008 09:29

when people are nervous they come across badly

Elasticwoman · 05/09/2008 09:49

If dh has taught ds to read, let HIM go and deal with Ms Bossy Boots teacher. Let HIM put teacher on the spot, get her to justify herself in this matter. Even better, both of you go and speak to teacher together. If necessary get ds to read something in the presence of you all. If still not happy, go to head teacher.

This matter should be resolved by reasoned discussion by the parties concerned.