how much do other parents matter when it comes to choosing a school?

[nowirehangers]

before xmas we need to decide on a school for dd1. We might go state or private, not going into that debate here. BUT I have noticed recently with dd1's nursery that bitchy school gate cliques, which I always thought were an invention, are in fact true and I want to stay well clear.
Nearest school to us is private. Have been told on a few occasions it's not right for me because it's "full of yummy mummies and you're not yummy." Also told it's very bling ... and I'm not bling.
Can't decide if these are compliments or insults (though it has made me think I need to smarten up a bit ), but it has made me think. The next school from us, which I hear is far more down-to-earth, is a good 10-min drive away if traffic is OK, while the yummy school is walkable. I am hate the idea of a school run for both eco and convenience reasons if it's avoidable. I also like the idea of dd1 having more local friends. But if I'm not going to fit in, does that mean she's not going to fit in? And ideally I'd like to be friendly with the other mums, though as I work four days a week I doubt I'll have that much to do with them. Ultimately it's where dd1 will be happiest and I don't think four year olds will give her too much stick because we don't have a 4 by 4/go skiing/wear top-to-toe designer. Or maybe they will? Wise advice gratefully received

I decide what is best for MY kids, I decide what I want for my kids! I tell no one why but, on the flip I would not ask where another kid was going as it is none of my business.

thanks all very much for your input
It's not a toss up between state and private (that will come later), atm it's between between private and private as we're lucky enough to be able to afford it (for now!). I am sort of discounting the state school, even though it looks lovely, because it's the furthest from us and there's so much competition in our borough for state places there's a strong chance we won't get a place there but at one miles away in which case forget about it.
One private school is bling, one is allegedly not but all your helpful comments are swinging me towards the bling option on the grounds of convenience. Keep trying to get an appointment to look round (wearing a smart outfit ) but every time we do something comes up with dh's work and we have to cancel.
But I think a bit of lurking in the car park at pick up and drop off time might be an idea as well ... the ditziest mum I know has a dd there and told me she loved the school because she was always going out to Boujis until 3am with the other mums, which isn't to my mind a recommendation