Daughter hating nursery

[miggy]

Does anyone have any advice! DS(4next mth) is at nursery attached to school her brothers go to. This is her 2nd yr there and due back post xmas tomorrow (yes-lovely long holiday!!!) She goes 3 mornings a week and is due to start this term 2 days and one morning. Problem is she hates it. I have to leave her crying every time (one morning last term that she didnt), every morning the first thing she says is "is it a school day for me". What has prompted current bout of despair for me is that I have just finished getting her to bed because she was crying so much, I didnt knoiw why and I said "youll be tired tomorrow its a school day" and she said "thats why I am crying- I want to be tired in the morning so you cant take me to school"-how bad do I feel now!
DS2 went to same nursery and didnt like it- but very shy-loves school there now.
Should I stop nursery and wait till school in September? HELP PLEASE

If I was you I'd stop and wait until September. Life's too short!! My friend said she refused point blank to go to nursery- sounded exactly like your daughter- she just wasn't ready- she went to school happily enough.

It sounds far too traumatic to do every day. Pull her out and enjoy your times together.

HTH (you sound like you want to pull her out- go for it and ignore any tut tutting- she's your child).

I'd definately feel like pulling her out as Jimjams said if possible.But why not try and get to the bottom of the problem first or at least try to see if there is one.2 suggestions,talk to the other parents,see if they sometimes stay and help out and ask them how your daughter is.Then stay and help out and get a feel for the place,suss things out,how are the other kids and how do the teachers behave with them.Ok?HTH.

I agree with Jimjams, Miggy, but also with Star's suggestion that before taking her out, it might be worth chatting to her keyworker or class teacher. How long has she been upset at the thought of nursery - did it just start last term? Maybe there is a child or a teacher she just doesn't hit it off with? We have seen a very big change in ds' attitude to nursery since he turned 3. Not that he dislikes it - but he is starting to think quite hard about his relationships with others there and he talks quite often about what he does and doesn't like, and if someone said something nasty to him.
But, if you don't have to be elsewhere and fancy her company, go for it and enjoy your time at home together. Good luck whatever you decide - it is your decision!

Thanks for the advice, problem is mums arent allowed to stay! positively discouraged to point of being asked to leave. She has always made a fuss in mornings but last year her teacher and helper were really friendly, knew what she was like but got her to help them with something etc and by the end of the year she was much better. This year new teacher just ignores us in mornings, I had to speak to head of nursery in order to get some help in mornings ie someone from nursery to actually speak to my daughter. She says my daughter is a "difficult child" (!) In fact I find her much easier than my 2 sons but she is shy. Problem is I work at times she is in nursery, my mother has offered to have her but feel guilty as she already has all of them in holidays.
Have found out that some other mums are having problems so will speak to them. I think its a nursery that suits some children and not others- open plan, big room, noisy etc. Trouble is its the one for the school where ds's go and she starts in September so have to be careful not to rock the boat!

Miggy, personally I wouldn't be very happy with the nursery. IMO they should still be doing what they were doing last year: talking to her and distracting her and helping her to settle in when she gets there. So maybe the new teacher and her attitude is the problem? Ignoring you in the morning is just NOT on. It must be hard if your dd is so unhappy at the idea of going, I do sympathise but I also think it is their problem as much as yours. Could you have another word with the person in charge and explain this? I think nurseries and pre-schools should positively encourage parents to stay and settle their child for as long as it takes - it's in everyones best interests. Yes, if you think this problem is insurmounatable you could just wait until September but if you have to work during nursery hours and want to avoid your mum having her is sounds as if you would really like to resolve the problem rather than pull her out. Also, if she starts school in Sept presumably you'd like her to know the children at the nursery who will be starting with her at the same time? Good luck, whatever you decide to do. And lots of children are like this about nursery or pre-school so it doesn't sound to me as if your dd is "difficult", it sounds as if the nursery is!