Daughter unable to attend her graduation ceremony as it is full. Advice please

[mildlyfried]

My daughter has just finished a three year Bsc (hons) at a major University. She has been advised that she cannot attend her graduation ceremony as it is full and she is on a waiting list. All the other ceremonies are at capacity too. She has been told that if a place does not become available then she can either try to graduate in November without her friends or have her certificate posted to her for a £10 fee.

To say we are upset and disappointed is an understatement. Has anyone ever heard of this before? I did not think a University would do this and would make sure they had enough graduation days/dates for all their students. The students have paid tens of thousands in fees and slogged for three years to be denied the chance to get their degree in a ceremony with their family watching.

Is there anyone out there with any advice? maybe someone who works at a University? I'm tempted to go to the local paper and tell the story so other students know what to expect at this University. Students should be told when they are choosing the University that they are not guaranteed a graduation.

Thanks for reading

Really? You teach at a university and you’ve never heard of a dual graduation schedule? St Andrews, UWE, Manchester, Bath, Newcastle, Edinburgh, Cumbria, Lancaster, Kent all do, just off the top of my head!

What about the students completing their degree in the Summer? Not all degrees have the standard May exams. Plus, huge cohorts get two opportunities to attend a ceremony at different times of the year. Some are in January, others in November, but it has been that way for at least 30 years.

This is not true if you get your child to authorise you to do so. I've done it for mine at university so I could deal with getting forms and paying their first years rent etc. I'd be reading them the riot act.

I think it's exceedingly bad form that your child would be denied a place. At a graduation we were at last year there was I think 2 allocated parents seats, and you could get extra if they had space, in our case they did. But each child should have a seat + 2 parents (or whatever, but min 2). We got an extra 2 places, so 5 in the end. It's an important milestone, for which the university have been paid handsomely.

But why are the university reducing it to a first come, first served bun fight? It's simple to arrange. Most ceremonies are organised so that a block of similar courses are given a morning or afternoon ceremony slot. If you have more students than will fit into a slot move one of the courses to another day. At my university we have our own facilities but lots of places rent somewhere and this may be where the problem lies.

Those saying she’s making a fuss about nothing are probably the same people who think that adults celebrating anything are mad.

A uni graduation with a good degree is a far greater cause for celebration IMO than a wedding. The cost alone, both in financial terms and of effort by the student in a world where you’re often paying fees to educate yourself almost entirely given the very limited face time with faculty, is a reason why the universities could at the least lay on something good at graduation.

One of my DCs graduated from a large uni last year. They had to say if they wanted to attend and then weeks later were given the schedule about which courses would graduate in which session. I assumed they based that partly on the numbers signing up. Seems a fairly sensible option and means everyone who wants to go can do.

My uni had a very small (historic) building for these ceremonies too. Those who were bothered about graduating at the same time as certain people made sure they applied together for the same dates. Your DD messed up, she needs to suck it up and make the best of it.

I have never heard of this.
If you want the gown, photo, and graduation 'gifts', mug, teddy, video, etc, then a ceremony is important; and to celebrate with their friends.
All each of my 3 X DC graduations, the department or university offered some additional event, such as a buffet lunch with the department, etc.
This is only worthwhile if your friends are there as well.
The whole point, is that you all have a fun day, etc
In all cases the number of guests were limited (though somehow some people managed to have about 10 guests, but I do not know how they did it)
Otherwise, if these things are not important (and to some people they are not), then have the certificate posted, and go out for a fancy meal yourself.

The percentage of students choosing their university on the basis of their chances of getting a ticket for their future graduation is approximately zero.

As it should be.

Lesson learnt (pun intended). Apply late and you risk the chance of being unable to attend. She's a grown up so needs to deal with this and not have her mother complaining. As others have said she can go in November. Also a graduation is not a free for all to attend.

Nonsense. They hold more ceremonies on the day or subsequent day as many other unis do.

Of course I have but if you've been through the same exam board as all your friends on the same course and you haven't got any resits why should you have to wait?

You are missing that this DD can go to a graduate ceremony!!

This issue is she hasn’t got the specific date she darn well wanted despite being fully aware that limited space and first come and first served.

If it meant so much to her to graduate on this specific date, she would have followed the example of her friends and responded promptly.

She will get to attend a graduate ceremony

So if it meant that much to her - then she should have acted as her friends did, and taken heed of the limited space and first come first served explicit info provided.

She did not

Come on! No one wants to graduate months after leaving uni separately from their peers! They may well have moved away to work. Unis need to start focussing on their students rather than administrative convenience.

But that means that there will always be some disappointment and it's in the universities gift not to create that disappointment in the first place.

She did apply later than others hence she is on the wait list

Some of my students tell me they don't read their emails, particularly ones from the University. They're silly young idiots!

If a student doesn't read their emails and doesn't respond to the invitation to register for their graduation in a timely way, then it is not really the university's fault.

Good grief

These are adults and such is life. Take heed of explicit instructions and act on it promptly. If you don’t, you might miss out.

and it's in the universities gift not to create that disappointment in the first place.

what on earth are you waffling on??!

Exactly

and so now she graduates on a different date. Not the date she wanted. But she didn’t want it enough to do as her friends did… and spend one minute responding to the invite.

but if it meant so much to her, why did she ignore the explicit warning that there was a risk she’d get a different date if she didn’t respond promptly?! Her friends read the incite, pressed respond, accepted the invite. Job done. They get the date they want.

DD… didn’t

Well there is a way round the problem isn't there? Probably more than one in fact. They could have more ceremonies, hire a different venue or use more than one venue. It isn't likely to be a truly unresolvable problem. I suspect the issue is probably really that all the solutions are all more expensive or resource heavy in other respects than the University feels reasonable.
To be fair to the University it is clearly stated on their website and probably on the info that students are sent so the OP's DD does have to bear some of the responsibility for her own situation, but it is a bit rubbish for a University not to be able to accomodate all the students who wish to graduate.

Blimey that’s a disgrace. Never heard of that before. I didn’t bother going to two of mine (went to the last one) but that’s not the point, if your DD wants to go to hers I would have assumed it was a done deal. What establishment is this? Because this is not acceptable and something prospective students need to know.

The university needs to accommodate all students eligible to graduate on the same day or following day. It’s not that complicated. Many universities manage it and regard it as part of the basic contract with students.

To put it in simpler terms, universities are screwing £30k out of young people and it's a bit shit of them not to spend a little bit of that money by putting on a few extra graduation ceremonies.

They have put on sufficient! If the dd responds promptly to the November grad invite and still doesn’t get in… sure you have a point!