6ft tall 12 year old DD getting skirt length violations

[TooTallDD]

I’m really annoyed about this and I am one who is normally in favour of strict uniform rules.

DD is 12 and at a Catholic school in Australia that supplies uniforms from its own school shop. DD is a 6 ft tall beanpole and wears her correct size which is the second smallest size available. The skirt is pleated and tartan with only a couple of millimetres in hemline. She has just received her second uniform violation as her skirt sits just above the knee when it is meant to be knee length. DD is always in the full correct uniform and never gets into any trouble.

I am thinking of emailing the school and putting it back on them- DD is wearing the correct uniform skirt from the school’s uniform shop, she does not shorten it in any way and if the school has an issue, the school needs to take it up with their uniform supplier and ask them to supply skirts for tall girls or at least add some hemline material that can be let down. (Although the pleats would make this challenging)

Is this a good approach? I’m ropable because in 1992 shy, quiet 6 ft tall me was hauled in front of a school assembly for a skirt length dressing down when I was also wearing the school skirt that had been fully let down. My mum sorted that with a phone call and I want to sort this for DD.

You should have contacted the school immediately after the first incident. They are policing her body. It is a problematic message and needs to be stopped.

she is wearing the official skirt in the closest available size. You will not be accepting anymore critiques of her clothing.

It would worry me that it's over 15cm ABOVE the 99.6th centile for her age.

Even though her mum is also 6ft?

I agree with the other. Push it back to the school. a 6ft girl should be on the range of normal that they cater for.

And?

At a scraping off 5ft 9, I was tall for my generation and taller than most of the boys when I started high school. (I was 5ft 7 then.)

I'm 66 and attended an oldies' exercise class today. I was the tallest woman in the room.

My cousin's daughters are taller than I am. (Genes and good feeding.)
They're now adults: 5ft 11, 6ft and 6ft 2 inches.

There was a situation some years back where Australian girls became ill after being given drugs to stunt their height, hence my horror at the suggestion that there's something wrong with being tall.

https://hormonesmatter.com/des-used-stunt-growth-tall-girls/

She has a mother who is 6ft1 and perhaps a Dad who is tall as well whilst it is above the centile it isn’t unheard of

I'll add that I first found out about the tall girl scandal about 20 yrs ago, when one of my friends was dying (in Scotland) from a rare blood cancer.

When our mothers were expecting us, the maternity home was dishing out anti-nausea meds.

Some girls developed health problems when they were middle-aged. Other children were born with deformed limbs. Turned out that they were offering more than one type of drug and one of them was thalidomide. It's likely that the other was the growth stunter given to Australian girls.

I'm thankful that my mum refused the meds. She was an 'ederly prim' and didn't want to take any chances.

And yes, I get a bit ranty about people suggesting that there's something wrong with a girl being tall.

My cousin's girls are all tall, strong, smart and beautiful. They all have partners and one of them has three kids at high school - all tall. Of course, no one ever comments about the height of the one boy (who is taller than his mother and his aunts).

Why?

Girls growth massively slows down after they begin their periods so, if they're going to be a tall adult, they will be tall at 12. I think the average is only 1-3 inches of growth after periods start. That would put her as tall as her mother or an inch or so taller. Very normal.

This is a good point. The UK often sells uniform in multipacks at places like Tesco and Asda, doesn't it? That struck me as so different when I first moved there.

For contrast, I had to buy my daughter summer blouses last week. You have to use the one uniform shop as the blouses are monogrammed and have a unique collar- hence the $75 price per shirt. It's more than a bit silly.

To the person who asked why do people pay to send their kids to such schools-- in the case of my family, they are state schools (donation optional)- but nonetheless considered top schools with long waiting lists. Your kid is probably not going to be delinquent on the way home from such a school because if anything happened to your $75 summer blouse, your mum would personally hand feed you to some of the larger deadly wildlife.

Your point, and that of PP, DOES NOT APPLY. What you suggest IS NOT AVAILABLE HERE. Nowhere sells generic grey or black a-line skirts that any school can pick and choose from because schools here don’t wear them.

OP asked for suggestions as to the best way of approaching the school to manage an issue. That’s all.

Ok SHOUTY POSTER. But - assuming that ordering online is a possibility - I would expect that a generic grey or black skirt would be easier to source - new or via preloved sites - than a specific tartan pleated one. Not least because parents could then look at adult sizes for a tall child as well as children’s ranges,

ETA I didn’t say A line - that was you.

Those generic black or grey skirts girls wear in the UK are just plain ugly! Schools downunder don't have those type of skirts, thank goodness.

Gotta say that a tartan pleated skirt as per the OP doesn’t sound beautiful.

Anyway, this is getting weird. Y’all have a nice day, and OP - good luck with the school.

Why are posters arguing over the beauty of a skirt they haven't seen?
The point is uniform is never beautiful its designed to be the same, classic item of clothing, which doesn't really date fashion wise, Its designed to make it clear who's a child and who's a teacher. It also helps staff spot someone who just shouldn't be there, kids with uniform from other schools!

I've sat at a primary school leavers service debating 'who's he' 🤔 before it twigged he was just a really tall 12 year old boy, tall and broad, towering over the female teachers, from a distance he looked like an adult man, he wore a plain coloured tie, the primary school ties were miles too short.

Where I live tartan skirts are common for girls' winter uniforms at state schools. I loved the one we had at my secondary, but ours wasn't a kilt, it had kick pleats. The school replaced it with a black and white kilt - not nearly as nice.

However girls generally wear something cooler in summer, the local high has a checked skirt.

It might still be worth getting seen just in case, honestly.

I’m a 5’11/6ft adult, but it is possible for a pre-teen to have a hormonal imbalance or genetic condition that could cause increased height that will continue on and on. Depends on the heights of the parents though, if both are tall, probably fine.

OP said in her first post that she was 6ft at school too.

It’s fine. I’m 6 ft 1, DH is 6ft 4. DD is the exact same height as me at 12. If DH and I were average heights I would have definitely got her checked out!

Thanks for all the advice on this thread. I’m going to take sandgroper’ advice and start at the uniform shop to see what the options are. I’m certain there aren’t options but want to be able to state this when I email the school.

Regardless of what uniform shop say or what you are able to order from them.
I'd also have words with school it, its really unfair for DD to be punished for wearing a skirt thats too short when its outwith her control. You don't want her to get self conscious over her height or her body in any way.

I was willing to bet your DH was taller than you. For some reason tall people are attracted to each other. Rare to see a very tall woman with an average sized or short guy.

can you get a bigger size and hold it up with a belt?

Update.

I popped into the uniform shop this morning with DD and said that DD was getting violations for her skirt length and asked to see the longer skirts in DD’s size. The lady looked at me rather pityingly and suggested I just lower the hem. I said there was no spare hem and showed her DD’s skirt. She looked disbelieving and said all the skirts had about 6 cm of hem that could be let down. She grabbed one in DD’s size, and lo and behold, no spare hem.

She quickly established that skirts in the 3 smallest sizes had no spare hem. She huffed a bit and said rather accusingly that they had never had this issue before as girls in these sizes are petite. She realised she was being rude and pivoted to asking DD the old “ do you play basketball” chestnut. Which is also rude but not intentionally so. Bet she wouldn’t ask our broad strapping Pacific Islander girls if they play rugby.

Anyway, DD tried on a skirt 2 sizes up- still too short but it had spare hem. However, the uniform lady hummed and went into technical dressmaking talk about darts and pleats and finally said that it would be really difficult to take the skirt in without messing with the pleats and having the skirt “sit funny”. I asked if the uniform supplier would send a longer skirt in DD’s size. This gave her conniptions and would be “quite impossible” as they did one big order a year. This was all exactly what I wanted to hear so before she could think of a complicated expensive solution, I thanked her and we left.

I have now emailed DD’s home form teacher (school is very strict about all communication outside of safeguarding to start with home form teacher)

Dear W,

DD has received 2 uniform violations for skirt length from X and Y. DD is wearing the school supplied skirt in her size and is not adjusting her skirts at all. DD’s skirt sits just above her knees because she is tall.

I went to the uniform shop this morning and discussed options with Z. It has been established that-

1. Skirts in DD’s size and the next size up do not have spare hemline to let down
2. Z felt that buying a skirt 2 sizes up and adjusting it would not work due to the fall of the pleats. Any adjusted skirt would look ill-fitted
3. Z is adamant that a one off order for a longer skirt in DD’s size would be quite impossible.

Please advise DD’s options here. I reiterate she is wearing the correct skirt as supplied by the school. While I await the school’s solution, I ask that staff refrain from giving DD any further uniform violations- please have them telephone me to discuss instead.

When I was 12 I was humiliated by teachers at my school for the exact same reason- being tall while wearing the school skirt, and I won’t tolerate this happening to DD again.

I look forward to receiving the school’s solution.

My last paragraph was a bit petty- clearly I am still smarting about it over 30 years later.

Not petty at all.

Bless you for fighting DD's corner.

@TooTallDD Perfect.

As an aside, it would be very interesting to pop in in 12 months time and inspect the hems on next year’s order. All the uniform shop managers I have known have been very pernickety about the uniform looking right, being comfortable and being affordable. They are well aware that their customers grow. I wouldn’t mind a squiz at her email to her supplier (just for the fun of it).

Well done, op, hope they stop being so stupid about this.

Any sane school uniform has skirts and trousers in a choice of length for each waist measurement, to allow for the variation in people’s shapes.

There is nothing petty at all about your last paragraph.