6ft tall 12 year old DD getting skirt length violations

[TooTallDD]

I’m really annoyed about this and I am one who is normally in favour of strict uniform rules.

DD is 12 and at a Catholic school in Australia that supplies uniforms from its own school shop. DD is a 6 ft tall beanpole and wears her correct size which is the second smallest size available. The skirt is pleated and tartan with only a couple of millimetres in hemline. She has just received her second uniform violation as her skirt sits just above the knee when it is meant to be knee length. DD is always in the full correct uniform and never gets into any trouble.

I am thinking of emailing the school and putting it back on them- DD is wearing the correct uniform skirt from the school’s uniform shop, she does not shorten it in any way and if the school has an issue, the school needs to take it up with their uniform supplier and ask them to supply skirts for tall girls or at least add some hemline material that can be let down. (Although the pleats would make this challenging)

Is this a good approach? I’m ropable because in 1992 shy, quiet 6 ft tall me was hauled in front of a school assembly for a skirt length dressing down when I was also wearing the school skirt that had been fully let down. My mum sorted that with a phone call and I want to sort this for DD.

This is awful. Uniform needs to be made for kids of all shapes and sizes. I would be very angry at the sanctions.

Don’t worry, we watch Home and Away 😂

You should definitely take it further as your DD is likely to already be feeling a bit uncomfortable being a very tall girl as other people can’t help themselves commenting about such things.

Last year DS got told off by the female Deputy for wearing a slim black tie with his white shirt as ties aren’t school uniform. A few days previously, the other male Deputy had commended the tie saying how smart it looked. 🤷🏻‍♀️

DS was badly bullied in the first 2 years of school so I’m happy that things have quietened down and he’s growing in confidence at last. He now has long hair, stud earrings, black eyeliner and nail varnish as he likes it and the girls are allowed to wear all three. 😂

If it’s a pattern you can work out how many extra squares need to be on it to be need length. I think our skirt came in two lengths 8 or 10 squares only. You had to have at least 8 showing - the teachers counted. Thats an easy way to check if the uniform shop even do the length you need. Wider may not mean longer.

Agree she definitely shouldn’t have to. I’m just suggesting rather than making it a general social justice issue why not just fix it for HER daughter as quickly as possible and that could be to just buy a longer skirt and take it in.

this attitude of “I’ll not be paying for a seamstress” etc I don’t think will help her daughter with the actual issue she is facing right now.

maybe the mum could alter the uniform policy in the long run but her daughter has a problem today I believe could be easily fixed by the mum / parent.

Don’t be silly!

Challenging obvious stupidity should be the default position of the parent surely?

Otherwise, what are you teaching your child about standing up for themselves when they’re an adult?

Or do you think they should grow up timid and afraid of challenging the opinions of others?

Whenever I read on here “I hate confrontation”, when it’s clear that the person simply needs to be more assertive and have a conversation with someone, I inwardly roll my eyes and think ‘your parent did you no favours growing up’.

You have my sympathies, I have a dd with very narrow feet - getting compliant footwear was an absolute nightmare. Schools are so stupidly rigid about uniform - all fine if you are fitting a standard sized child - I know this sounds a bit unhinged but by the time my kids left I hated the school they attended and their shitty, obsessive little rules - I had lost all respect for them (I hid this from my kids though).

I went to catholic school in the UK with the same problem. The skirt had the school logo on it. Wore the longest one which also meant it was to big on the waist and was constantly told off for it.

My mum went to the head teacher and said it’s not short, it’s the longest length you have and she’s the tallest girl in the year

Don't start adjusting it. The school and their suppliers are absolutely responsible for providing the lengths of skirts they require.

I was your daughter. She can't change her body but the school can change their policies or their uniform supplier. Please let her see you push back hard on this, and show her that the world can adjust to fit her - she does not need to shrink or diminish herself in order to fit in.

This is a good draft and saves @TooTallDD the hassle of arguing with the school uniform shop. Let the Principal do it.

I’m British but I used to live in Australia. It really made me smile to see the word ropable!

I also remember Kim from Kath & Kim pronouncing it “gropable”!

Really disagree with this approach. It IS a social justice issue and it needs to be addressed as such.

This could affect another very tall girl in a different cohort.

Your suggested approach is very individualistic and I think we dont need anymore of that in the world today. The school needs to be made aware for the sake of TallDD but also any other child being picked on for nonsensical things.

My DD (14) is also 6ft tall. Most of her height is in her legs (36" inside leg) and she is a UK size 8/10. Her waist measurement has only increased by 1" since Y6, but her shoe size is now a UK 10. Her school uniform skirt is on the short side (about 3 or 4 inches above her knees), and the only suitable school shoes that I can find to fit both her feet and the school rules (plain black, no logos etc) are Nike Air Force Ones. Trainers! And mega expensive. She is permitted to wear trousers, but the school supplier does not make any long enough. I agree with schools having uniforms, but they need to realise that "one size fits all" rules are not possible. The more of us who complain about the availability of suitable sizing, the better.
So yes, take it up with the school on your side of the world as I am on mine. Good luck!

I’m surprised you need to be ask honestly - they provide the uniform, they are failing your daughter.

I would not be paying anyone to alter the school supplied uniform (which is probably also against their rules). She is wearing the uniform they make available, if it doesn’t conform to their rules then they need to address their failings. Its just ludicrous but as a fellow beanpole with beanpole children I find it depressingly believable.

I've learned two words today, Poms and ropable. I'm stoked.

What used to annoy me was that the boys’ trousers came in differing waist and length combinations. I never had trouble getting beanpole trousers for the boys at this stage. Women of course are all the same height 🙄

I agree.

I find this obsession that some schools have with specifying uniform to the minutest detail bloody ludicrous. People come in all shapes and sizes and if they're specifying a particular item, the school needs to make sure that that item is available in a wide range of sizes, lengths etc so that all pupils can get clothes that fit.

This is an inclusivity issue imo.

I don’t think there’s any question here - you just go to the school and tell them this is unfair. No parents should have to be faffing about lengthening school uniforms for a fucked up patriarchal policy. What about equality and diversity? I’d throw in all those buzzwords.

Gen X mostly know this because of a childhood spent watching Neighbours followed by Home and Away every evening!

It is not fair but your DD still needs to follow he uniform code like everyone else.
Go to the school. There should be complete understanding until your DD's skirt can be sorted. The school might know of a dressmaker.

Buy a skirt longer than the correct length and have a dressmaker alter it to fit. As she grows less bean poley DD can have the skirt let out.

Skirt sizes rarely fit exactly matched to ages.

Look at a map. Some of it is.

You're being weirdly timid about this!

Just write to her head of year to say that she's in the correct waist size, it's neither her fault or yours that the correct length isn't available, and therefore the punishment has been unfair. That their approach so far has been to shame her for her height, which is against their policy/values - can they please confirm that it won't happen again, and that, if they feel that skirt length is critical, they will be providing s a bespoke skirt?

If you know they are strict rules about the skirts, the best thing would have been raising the issue with the school as soon as you realised you are breaking them, not waiting for it to be punished.
Never mind, raise the issue now.

I think the whole uniform thing is absolutely ridiculous, let alone pushing the girls wear skirts if they dont want to, or letting them only choose from a few models of shoes /have had that in the UK public school/.

Thanks Ozzie.
Pom