Bedales or St Edmund's

[Stillworkingonit2]

We are looking for a school for our neurodiverse son and Bedales and St Edmund's have both been recommended to us many times. He has been coping well in mainstream with additional support but we feel that he will do better with smaller class sizes. One school is in Petersfield and the other is in Hindhead and we live equidistant from both. We are obviously planning to go and see both but would really love to hear opinions from other parents with neurodiverse children who have attended either. We currently have some friends with a child at St Edmund's and they are satisfied with the support their child receives but we would love some more opinions from other parents at both schools please.

We also have 2 younger children who are not neurodiverse so would also also like opinions on whether they are good all rounder schools that would suit all of our children as they would probably follow our son there. Thank you!

Have you visited either? As that will give you a better feel. And it depends what flavour ND they are- at Bedales they have a lot of "freedom" AKA the teachers give the children a lot of independence which can result in the child not doing any work...

Thank you for your reply. He has autism and ADHD. I will definitely be visiting both. I was just hoping to get an idea of other parents experiences to help me to work out the questions I needed to ask. Your reply is really helpful as I now know to enquire about the level of freedom children are given at Bedales. Thank you!

Have you considered Frensham Heights or Morehouse?

Our ND boys are at Frensham (have been since YR 3 and Reception) and it’s been wonderful for them.

The staff are incredibly supportive and the new head has really breathed new life into the school after a couple of challenging post-Covid years.

We would ideally like him to be in a co-ed so that counted Morehouse out. My impression of Frensham was that it was very arty and free spirited. Our son isn't either of those! Have I got the wrong impression?

This may be a bit late but we’ve had good experience at Bedales and very very poor at st Edmunds for neurodiversity:

Only just reading this, but it still might be helpful! OP You don't mention what year your son will be going in to. I can only really speak for the Senior school at Bedales. My daughter has been incredibly well supported - her diagnosis of autism and ADHD has only been recent, but that had been gained with the schools support. The Day House team are brilliant and the SENCO's have all been really helpful in ensuring that she has the right access arrangements going into her exam years. She came up through the pre-prep and prep schools but largely went under the radar until everything fell apart at Senior School. DD2 is NT and at the Prep School but I am aware of other ND children and think on the whole most people are happy with the SEN provision at the Prep School. The schools and staff are very open to working with you for the wellbeing of your child. Happy to answer any specific questions via DM.

Not too late at all! Sorry I haven't responded sooner! Please could I ask what made your experience at St. Edmund's so poor? We were impressed by the SENCO at St. Edmund's. She seemed very 'on it' but is that not the case with the rest of the school?

It’s my understanding that More House plan to be co-ed in the immediate future and that parents at St E’s aren’t impressed that a knock on effect of other local private schools means that class sizes there are increasing.

St E’s and Bedales are very different. St E’s is more academic and Bedales more arty (it seems strange you have ruled out Frensham Heights but are considering Bedales as usually parents consider both or rule out both).

Thank you. Our son is currently in Year 6 so we think the best time to move him will be at the end of this year. Our other 2 are currently in Reception and Year 2 and we have decided we would ideally like to move all 3 at the same time. Do you think the pre-prep and prep are good too?

That's really helpful info about More House thank you!

Frensham seemed a bit too free-spirited for our son. He really likes rules and routines and that wasn't the impression we had when we visited Frensham. Bedales seemed to be stricter (in a good way).

St. Edmund's seemed to be trying to give the impression that they were the fun option with great escape and Harry Potter themed activity evenings and sledging when it snowed but as you have said they are more academic I am now questioning that.

Are the class sizes large at St. Edmund's? We were under the impression that there were around 12-16 in a class? Is that not the case?

I think you will need to check the class sizes at St E’s and speak to your friend whose child goes there. I don’t know what they used to be and what they have grown to or are expected to grow to. Several local private schools have closed and it definitely caused St E’s to increase their class size. That said, hopefully the increased numbers at the school means it won’t be one that will be closing in the future.

Thank you and yes I suppose that is definitely a silver lining!

Both my daughters have come up through the pre-prep and prep, my youngest is now in Year 8 (the final year of prep). We’ve just had a change of head — it’s too early to judge fully, but the signs so far are positive. I’d really encourage you to visit on an open day and let your son try one of the taster days.

No, Bedales isn’t an academic hot house, but that doesn’t mean results aren’t strong. What really stands out is the breadth of subjects and activities, which give children the space to discover and develop their own strengths. The facilities are, in my view, fantastic, and the atmosphere is both happy and supportive across the three schools.

I would disagree with an earlier comment that says the children are given a lot of freedom, there is structure but within that they are allowed to make their own decisions at times theres a difference.

Children spend a great deal of time outdoors — in the grounds, through Outdoor Work, and at the working farm. With animals all around the campus, it’s a real advantage for children with Autism or ADHD, as they aren’t confined to classrooms all day. The school is also very good at recognising and responding to individual needs, offering a high degree of flexibility.

Hello, sorry to wade in on this - but I am also looking for a school in this vicinity (though ideally closer to Godalming), and I would too be grateful to hear of schools suiting teens with ASD/ADHD. I know of More House too, but they told me they primarily deal with dyslexia / dysgraphia / dyspraxia etc and sole ASD/ADHD diagnoses are not specifically their speciality. Also our dc could do well academically, it’s more the social and communication side that he really needs support on. I am not sure he would really want to be forced into too many team sports either, which is tricky at some of these private schools. I have been considering King Edward’s Witley but confused over varying opinions.

I would love to hear suggestions also.

Hi- SENCo herself is great and right formal support can be accessed where solely in her control (and if headteacher considers it’s a worthy recipient ) . Absolutely agree: but our experience is that across the school and recognition that a ND child is the responsibility of everyone, and the way they interact/do what they “normally” do, is really obviously not there. We found that ND child even with cognitive area of need (can’t imagine what it’s like for the other less initially “academic” areas of need) is SENco job, not teaching staff unless they’re given black and white day by day hour by hour “instructions”. Some leaders at school clearly of view there’s over diagnosis (not that there was under diagnosis in the past) and child just had to leave as education was slipping - and yet not at Bedales.

That's really disappointing to hear. When my friend mentioned they had ELSA trained TAs I thought that was an indication that St Edmund's would be a nurturing, accepting place. Really disappointing to hear those in charge are not on the same page.