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Original poster

I'm shocked at this teachers behaviour. Do I need to do something?

83 replies

Spidermama · 13/05/2008 19:34

My dd, who's nine, told me today that her teacher regularly shows pupils work to the whole class to scorn it.

The other day she took the picture a boy had done of the school trip and said, furiously, 'Do you really call this a picture of our school trip?' DD said he's not the best drawer but the picture was OK. Then she threw it on the floor.

DD said the boy went very red and quiet (he's a well behaved boy) and the class laughed.

I think this must have been so traumatic for him. I can't believe she can be such a bully and feel compelled to do something. But what? Should I interfere? It wasn't even my child but I don't think I can do NOTHING about this.

What, if anything, would you do?

OP posts:
sillybut · 15/05/2008 11:43

I had a teacher like that. I am dyspraxic so had a lot of trouble with reveresing letters and so on. He once made me go to the front of the rooma and draw lines of 9, p, d and b on the blackboard. Needless to say I couldn't get them right and he kept me up there in front of the whole class telling me I was stupid. (I saw him last week and took great pleasure in telling him exactly who successful I now am LOL)

Some teachers are power crazed b*stards who should never have entered the profession. Please mention your concerns its a horrible way to treat a child

MascaraOHara · 15/05/2008 11:51

Yes, you edfinitely need to see the head and ALSO you need to make it clear that your dd is very anxious about not being found out.. I think that speaks volumes for the teacher. she is frightened of being bullied by the teacher for speaking out.

I was humiliated a number of times in middle/junior school by one teacher and it ruined, I mean ruined my confidence. I truly believe all my confidence issues stem back that to teacher.

I then went on to secondry school where I had one prticular teacher take a dislike for me and systematically bully me for over a year to the point where I used to walk into his lesson and he would tell me to get out, straight away. He killed himself though and as a grown up recognise he had other issues. but I can assure you that he was trying to stop me sitting my exams and if he hadn't killed himself (which led to us having a supply teacher) he would have ruined my chance of a career. He was a maths teacher btw.

Sorry, I've rambled. raw nerve. Everytime I hear about bullying teachers I get so mad.. they can really fuck up lives and they often get away with it.

cupsoftea · 15/05/2008 11:55

I would remove my child from the class straight away & make an appointment with the head.

wannaBe · 15/05/2008 12:03

What is it with maths teachers?

my maths teacher in primary yanked me out of my chair by my collar and shook me for no reason. Ghastly individual he was. Except I told my mum who went in and had words, and stood in front of him and grabbed his collar and shook it and said "how does that feel!" and she said he just stood there like a naughty school boy and didn't say a word he never did it again though.

And my maths teacher in secondary had real issues although it later transpired that her husband was a paedophile and had been abusing their children and went to jail.

lljkk · 15/05/2008 12:08

We only have OP's DD's word for what happened and how it went down, thru adult eyes it might seem quite different.

What if the teacher didn't single the boy out, but was holding up a random selection of work for the class to look at?
What if the drawing really was bad and below the boy's ability, what if the teacher said something slightly different than the words quoted, or in an exasperated rather than scornful tone?
What if she told the class off roundly for tittering at the lad?
What if she was throwing everything (good or bad drawings on the floor each time?

I think I would want to confirm the story or type of behaviour before getting outraged.

JeremyVile · 15/05/2008 12:12

I dont think it matters one bit that this didn't happen to your DD.
She is present when this teacher behaves in this way. Any child in the class could be upset by it and the parents of every child in the class have the right to speak to the HT and say that this is not acceptable.

MascaraOHara · 15/05/2008 12:46

"What if she was throwing everything (good or bad drawings on the floor each time?
"

erm.. she shouldn't be throwing any drawings on the floor.

Teaandcake · 15/05/2008 13:40

I too was bullied and humiliated by a teacher at primary school so this has hit a nerve with me too.

I was particularly vulnerable at the time, I was 10 years old and my Dad had just died. I never told my Mum about it because she had enough on her plate trying to figure out how to bring up 3 kids alone and pay the mortgage on a part-time cleaner's wage. I just had to try and deal with it on my own.

I would have loved someone to stand up for me and put an end to it. The damage these people do to a child's confidence is immeasurable.

Diana W's comments have hit the nail on the head.

maltloafeater · 15/05/2008 13:54

this brings back so many memories of being humiliated in exactly the same way by a french teacher when i was eleven. I vowed not to make any effort in his lesons after that and sat at the back taking no part in the class. i must have had some natural ability as i managed to come 4th in the class in the end of year exam, and he just made a nasty snide comment in my report. one of my biggest regrets is not being able to speek a language and i hold this moron directly responsible. dont let your dd be affected by this incident. the teacher must not be allowed to get away with undermining childrens confidence in this way.

LynetteScavo · 15/05/2008 13:57

I wouldn't want my DC whitnessing this kind of behaviour, so I'd bring it up with the head. I'd also looking to have my Dc taken out of that class.

Rhubarb · 15/05/2008 13:57

There is a teacher in the secondary school where I work like this. She teaches Art and regularly scorns pupil's work in front of the entire class, she also calls them things such as "lazy" and "spoilt brat". Have a look at my blog under Confessions of a Learning Support Assistant.

Although her "methods" are well known, nothing is done about it. There is little I can do without suffering repercussions myself. But I would advise that you have a word with other parents as they may have similar issues. Then talk to the Head armed with a list of parents and their objections too. Parents do have power and if more parents spoke out, more would be done.

totalmisfit · 15/05/2008 14:17

sounds like that teacher has fallen into an 80's time warp. i remember teachers doing exactly the same thing when i was at school but i thought it was one of thsoe things which teachers can no longer get away with.

Original poster
Spidermama · 15/05/2008 20:44

Thanks for all your posts and particularly to those of you who remember being humiliated at school by teachers in a similar way.

I told the class rep today. Quite by chance she happened to have with her the boy who was the victim of this behaviour as he was going with her ds for a play date. I will approach the head too.

My DH had some terrible teachers at his rough all boys comp in Birmingham in the seventies and he nurses some painful memories. His brother, a very bright aspy techy type, was very, very badly bullied by teachers and pupils alike. It has taken a big chunk out of his life and really shaped his relationships.

OP posts:
DianaW · 16/05/2008 03:16

Let's put it this way - I am nearly 47 and i still remember an incident in the first grade in which another child was humiliated by the teacher. It had nothing to do with me, and I was in no danger of this teacher, she loved me and I did well in school. I still remember VIVIDLY just what she said to a little girl who was having trouble reading, I remember the girl's name and how she cried, I've wondered many times since then what became of her later.
Other children in the room can definitely be severely affected by an abusive teacher even when it isn't directed at them personally.

DianaW · 16/05/2008 03:19

Having gone to school in the 60's and 70's, it makes me sad to hear someone say "I thought that was an 80's thing!" Wow, it's a shame how little some things change.

Buda · 16/05/2008 05:18

Well done for doing something about it. This teacher needs to find another career tbh.

I think the fact that it is not happening to your DD makes it easier for you to approach the head tbh. You can't be accused of being in any way precious or over-protective of your DD iyswim.

aGalChangedHerName · 16/05/2008 07:20

God it makes me sick to hear that Spidermama

My ds1 reguarly has the piss taken out of him in 1st and 2nd year at high school by his CDT teacher. Used to make animal noises (to do with our surname) and make fun of his hair etc. Also called ds1's pal who is Pakistani chocolate boy

My ds never told me about it till after he left his class as he was afraid it would make the teacher do worse stuff

Ds2 is in 1st year and thankfully doesn't have him but have told him he MUST tell me if anything happens and i will sort it out.

Am terrified about the dd's starting school as the primary school the ds's went to has it's fair share of sadistic twatty teachers

You are doing the right thing. Let us know how you get on?

Original poster
Spidermama · 16/05/2008 13:41

I have mentioned this to the class rep now. Today I phoned to talk to the head but he was about to leave to go to London and his secretary suggested I email. Well I just started to email but actually I'd rather talk to him over the 'phone or face to face because it's a very serious and delicate issue.

Perhaps I'll email words to that effect and ask to set up an appointment to call or visit next week.

OP posts:
MascaraOHara · 16/05/2008 13:45

I think you should see him face to face.

People are much easier to ignore over phone or email.

MrsGuyOfGisbourne · 16/05/2008 13:51

DH (now very ancient ) recalls having one his drawings held up to ridicule by a primary teacher. Makes me thinking about it - poor little boy

TooTicky · 16/05/2008 13:56

This is shocking. I hate the idea of children being discouraged in this way, particularly over something creative
Good luck Spidermama.

duchesse · 16/05/2008 13:57

Do you know what was on the picture? My guess is a giant willy or something. No teacher these days would belittle a child's work like that...

Lulumama · 16/05/2008 13:59

DH is 35 and remembers vividly at school at the age of 6, a picture he had drawn, beautifully shaded and coloured in, being held up and ridiculed and then ripped up by the teacher. it started a long slide down at school, and he hated it. so it is so very important to knock this sort of thing on the head immediately. it is totally inappropriate, even if the story has been a bit exaggerated, holding up and throwing pictures and taking the p*ss out of children is not ever ,ever acceptable in teh classroom.

Original poster
Spidermama · 16/05/2008 14:01

duchesse I only wish that were the case. dd says it was an ordinary, unremarkable picture from a quiet and well behaved boy. I too wondered if perhaps it was a rebellious squiggle or a rude picture but sadly this was not the case.

It's also not the first time she has done it.

OP posts:
duchesse · 16/05/2008 14:02

The thing is that unless this teacher is about 70 years old, they will have been extremely well trained in differentiation and inclusiveness. Belittling even bullying a child to that extent these days is career suicide. What may have happened to we oldies in the 60s/ 70s is really not the same as what happens now.