Piano angst--help!

[Bridie3]

Both my children have been taught piano by an 84-year-old in our village. He is sweet but not exactly in tune with modern methods of teaching. Eventually, after a series of very mediocre exam results for my son, we moved him to another teacher. First exam after he moved my son got a good merit in a jazz piano exam (I know exams aren't everything but they are a useful monitor of progress).

My daughter is still with the old gent as she likes him better than my son does. She's just a got a really scrappy pass at Grade 3. I asked the teacher to give her a mock exam and he marked her as being of merit level--possibly even distinction. Previous marks have been a near-miss on a merit at Grade 2 (with me doing a lot of extra coaching at home, which, frankly I just can't do any more as I'm so busy); and a scrappy pass at Grade 1.

Obviously something isn't working. I'd like to move her to my son's teacher, who is young, has children the same age and just understands how to motivate them and make it fun. But--the old gent. has become a bit of a family friend and is very sweet. I also think he finds the money useful as he's not well off.

SO tell me what I say to him. Usually I'd be honest but given his age and vulnerability (he's widowed) I can't bring myself to say that I just don't think he can do the job any more.

Tell him that you have come to value him too much as a friend so you don't feel comfortable being in a position where he is basically working for you. Say that you do not want to lose his friendship so you think it is best if you find a new piano teacher and he can come round for tea???????

I'd certainly be able to offer continuing friendship. Thanks avenanap.

Could you tell him that you're terribly sorry, and that you know he'd be the best teacher for your DD - but that your DD is desperate to do everything the same as her brother, including having the same teacher? (And then invite him round for tea). Though that might be difficult if she really likes him...

Or could you invent an alternative activity for her that clashes with piano? (I remember my mum inventing riding lessons to get my sister out of Brownies. The only problem was that she forgot which lie she'd told when she met Brown Owl in the village!!)

Failing that, could you invent an activity for yourself that means you can't take your DD any longer?

These are probably a bit rubbish, and aveanap's suggestion might be a better bet! Good luck anyway...

They are good ones nelly. I'll have to remember those ones.

Nice idea but he's actually very flexible and good about changing lessons to suit us.

But I think the bit about dove-tailing with my son's activities is a good idea, though. I might say that, from Sept. we'll just be spending so much time in that other town (where my son is at school and has his piano lessons) it would be easier to have her piano lessons there, too.

My daughter is a bit upset about leaving him but I think I have to put her musical development first. Not just exams (though the latest mark was demoralising for her) but general fun.

THANKS!