Falkner house BOYS

[Normom]

Hello, my son got an offer from FH and I am wondering if I should accept it.
when I went there the mom and daughter that own the school painted everything like it’s picture perfect.
Then two friends there told me many different things than what I was told by that family, for example, the fact that Anita said they had no tutors, which is completely opposite or the fact that the kids are happy and my friends told me the kids there have so much pressure, and many aren’t happy!
they also told me not only the kids feel the pressure, the moms feel it too, however these moms are happy with the pressure because it will mean their kid gets into St Paul’s or Wesminster. This is what every parent there wants, already deciding what is going to happen to them in years

The principal talked also about no how they don’t have false positives, apparently they have false positives based on my friends. however even if there are false positives, they seem to think that the kids do well mainly because the parents push and make sure they have tutors (all of them do and the teachers encourage it) some are bright, some are false positives but they are all pushed by parents.

the teachers at my sons nursery seem to think my son is very bright, so I thought this school would be ideal. My friends on the other hand say he will do well there but if I want the pressure for him and for Myself? Is also a full time job like they say?

I would appreciate some opinions cause I feel maybe I shouldn’t take this offer however I feel pressure of why I didn’t in front of other moms. If I feel pressure already imagine later??? So maybe I should go for a more gentle school even through they say my son is supposedly bright? He might as well do great at Thomas?
Thanks in advance

Well do you have the option of Thomas at this point? Because it is ballot isn't it

A bright child will do great at a school such as Falkner House, no direct experience of the boys school but have a friend with daughters at the girls school and they love it!
I think the pressure mainly comes from the parents, not the school. From parents who choose to tutor or who see no other options except St.Paul’s, Kings, or Westminister. Yes the school suits bright children as it challenges them academically but if you didn’t have to tutor your son to get in (as I know some parents do and then they end up struggling) then I doubt you will have to tutor him throughout his school experience to do well.
Personally, I think if you’re paying for education then you’d want to be paying for a school that helps children to do well academically.

Mom of a current Fh boy here

1. Most schools tell you something when you visit and do another. FH is not special on that. They are happy for your son to take a tutor if needed and they will indeed encourage you
2. Kids feel the pressure. I wonder if my son would have been happier @ Thomas, and still attend Oxbridge by following a different route. A less competitive route. You need higher grades when you come from Wesminster than when you come from a second level school. I wasn’t thinking about university or even what secondary school my son would be attending before he started FH

As a parent I have anxiety. My husband said I have changed a lot since our son started FH. For example: During the first birthday my son and I attended, which was in September, two moms were talking me down because I didn’t know about 7+, 8+. I have been talked down for thinking it’s too early to think about senior schools when my son was in reception. How tutors are a must… there are many ways to say things, and management and parents have a certain negative tone. I have done my homework now and it doesn’t happen anymore. I am aware of everything and I keep getting informed.

after I have done my research and I want my son to go to a top school and attend Oxbridge. I think he will do it. Small percentage of the boys here attend the very top schools, however the majority of parents want to
Not all parents want, because some parents have realised it’s not possible. Some parents the teachers have told them it is not possible for their kids to take the exams but still try or get very angry.
If you don’t have that mindset, look for other schools or you will probably change
Even I have changed I still feel like an outsider. It is not because of money, I feel I have different ideas than they do. I am friends with other moms whose sons attend GH, Thomas, Fox, Chepstow. FH moms I am friendly with but they aren’t my friends

Thank you. Thomas ballot is gone, the discovery sessions are back. They are in January. Hoping my DS gets in Thomas. I have paid deposit at Falkner but I am not sure wether I am making a mistake or not

Following

What did you decide? I’ve got the same predicament

Hi all not sure if you are still making up your mind. I am a previous FH mum boy and girl. And I don’t recognise Falkner in these words… we are from abroad and knew nothing about the British system and competitiveness when we signed up. We felt FH compared to school like Wetherby Eaton square etc was so much nurturing. It is a very small environment one form per year groups. Everyone will know your child and take care of him. We were told when he felt sad and when he was happy to share a news that happened at home. We felt supported during Covid and when it was time to come back To school after Covid which was quite tough for our son. We did not felt our son was pushed but he was supported. He did went through the 7+ route because the school thought he was ready. The school is very transparent: They did tell some parents their sons were not. And for some of them even with some tutors (decided by the parents and frowned up by school at this stage) did not succeed.
homework is minimal and interesting, typical 10 words spelling and a poetry to learn every 2 weeks.
there was no 7+ club or extra preparation outside of school. They did provide us with some papers for the holiday that were optional (3/4 in maths and English)
You will always find some pushy parents wherever you go, people that want to scare you or stress you but you know your child best. I was told my daughter will not pass the 4+ assessment if she did not know how to read write her name etc. She came from a simple daycare with no focus on academic and was successful almost everywhere she went. She was engaged and happy and interested in discovering new game and willing to participate.
All the teacher we met at FH boys and girls were lovely, supportive and constructive which is what we were looking for.
Plus they have dogs…. :p

How did you find the other parents at the school? Did they do much sport/ theatre studies?

For a lot of our time there it was Covid so unfortunately not much drama although they have one lesson per week in the curriculum I think. So only the traditional nativity play. I think this year the girls and the boys school are doing a play altogether. They had that a few years back as well playing Oliver Twist.
sports is the downside of FH in my opinion as the children have to go to battersea (girls) or Holland Park (boys) or virgin active for swimming which implies lots of time in transport (either walking or bus).
if you want a sporty school that is not for you.

We decided to accept the offer @Thomas Kensington. I thought kids behaviour is the same in both schools but at falkner house mrs Dixon seems so strict, and at Thomas they aren’t like that, however I noticed excellent behaviour.
I felt there are less pushy parents there. My friends at falkner basically told me they probably wouldn’t be my friends. One of my friends said she tells her son not to hang out with a boy that isn’t that bright. Fair enough she doesn’t want to be friends with the mother but telling her son that?
I Was appalled but she says it’s bad influence
I haven’t told them I am not going to send my son there, I am losing my deposit anyway! I also have not cancelled just in case I change my mind but I doubt. I feel my son will be happier there, he likes sports and they lack on that. And I feel that school is too strict. Still I thought it was a wonderful school, but I felt for us Thomas was better

Hello, I am probably providing feedback way too late but thought I would do it anyways! I have 2 boys at Falkner House and it is an excellent school. Yea, it is academic, the school invests a lot in its teachers, they are highly experienced and have been with the school for years. The school knows every child very well. They will ensure your child reaches their full potential. Neither of my boys are naturally that academic yet they love going to school. The teachers are nurturing and make sure the kids have fun at the same time.

The pressure comes from the parents not the school and since it is an academic school, it will naturally attract parents targeting the top schools. The school has neither encouraged nor discouraged us to tutor, that is a family decision. It has only told us to keep in mind how much work the boys do at school especially during 11+ preparations, and the boys obviously need to have enough time to rest.

I saw the note on Mrs Dixon, I would disagree. I would not describe her as strict. She is extremely kind, caring, always welcoming, and ready to chat. She knows all the children very well.

We visited the school recently and our son will be doing the assesments for reception in the autumn. I liked the teachers and the boys seemed lovely but found the communication between the Head and her mum chaotic and a bit stressful, the classrooms felt very plain and not recently refurbished/maintainted to a high standard. The lunch space was also extremely small and would be quite cramped with all this traffic down the stairs too. They do seem to have great results and to be able to retain teachers which is fantastic but I always wonder how much are the results due to tutoring vs due to the teaching.

@BC23 I have 2 boys at the school if you would like to chat. The results are definitely due to excellent teaching. A lot do get tutoring closer to exams as well but that’s not enough on its own. Happy to share more details.

Thanks so much, appreciate it, will be in touch if he gets in and we are considering.