Headteacher used a biscuit in Maths and tried to feed our Coeliac daughter and when told not to, laughed about it

[RLBo]

Our daughter has Coeliac Disease - (the school is well aware of this as she is hyper sensitive). She had a 1:1 Maths lesson with the Headteacher who used a non gluten free biscuit to demonstrate fractions, the head teacher broke the biscuit apart and put it in our daughters face and said 'go on eat it, it's yours' pushing the biscuit towards her. Our daughter said 'no I can't eat it, it will make me ill' to which the headteacher laughed and said 'oh I will eat it then, yum yum yum' putting crumbs all over our daughter and the desk.

I was shocked at this behaviour and made a complaint. To which the reply was; the headteacher said she had forgotten that our daughter was Coeliac and that she wasn't wrong in doing this?

How would you respond? because in my eyes, it's once again a school brushing something that is serious under the carpet and dismissing it.

Interested to know your thoughts

Big error on HT’s part. A proper apology to your daughter is warranted and an overhaul of their allergy data.

We need to stop pretending food is benign/fun/trivial. Any teacher using food in the classroom without checking allergies and dietary requirements is negligent.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-48872090

DD who has a nut allergy that her school was aware of( care plan in place) was given a prize of peanut M&Ms!! When she said she can’t, the teacher didn’t apologise and didn’t offer to replace with a safe prize.

1 teeny tiny single crumb is all it takes to make a coeliac very ill indeed.

I can accept the headteacher made a mistake - she's only human, people can make mistakes and luckily nothing serious happened this time. However, the reaction afterwards is a huge red flag in how seriously they take allergies, as well as being totally insensitive.

OP I’m sorry people are being dicks on this thread. I totally get it. This is just evidence that if you don’t know the prolonged pain and misery a crumb can cause your child, it’s easier to scoff and say shite like “get a grip.”

Sorry this happened to your daughter. A quiet word with the headteacher and a link to coeliac uk perhaps?

This is awful OP. YANBU and some of the replies on here are astoundingly ignorant. Coeliac is a lifelong auto immune condition and I'm pretty amazed at the lack of understanding here. Not appropriate in a school and the head's response is awful.

This 🙄

If headteacher laughed then ate it in your child’s Face ID have a problem with this too-it sounds like bullying- mn is so weird sometimes!!!!

@Iwillnotdancewiththedevil

And how exactly do you think OP's child ingested said teeny tiny crumb? As a PP said, was she sat there with her mouth open, waiting for crumbs? Otherwise, hyperbole

Im really surprised by a lot of the responses on this thread. Ok so a headteacher is unlikely to know the details re all the kids in their school but her response was really weird and infantile.

If a child said "actually, I cant eat that because it would make me ill if I did" would you say "Oh I will eat it then" scatter crumbs about and then say "yum yum". I doubt it very much.

Anyone with any compassion at all would surely have said something like "ooops Im sorry, I didnt realise you cant eat certain things" shoved the biscuits away in a bag/drawer and completed the lesson by demonstrating fractions by folding and cutting pieces of paper instead.
No I wouldnt want the headteacher sacked but they certainly need to address their attitude and ability to react appropriately in a professional and compassionate manner. A lifetime of not being able to eat what most other people can isnt fun and even less so when people rub your nose in it.

17% of fatal food-anaphylaxis reactions in school-age children happen while they are at school

It's not just about coeliac, it's about not having fully understood that there should always be proper checks before using food in the classroom

https://www.allergyuk.org/for-industry-and-education/schools-early-years/

Best response 👌

My daughter is coeliac too, but I think have a quiet word and stop mulling over it. There is a bit of dramatic embellishment, implying that the headteacher was deliberately showering your daughter with crumbs. In my daughter’s case, it is ingestion that is the problem. Your daughter is in her sixteenth year and able to say NO.

Yanbu op. I don't what it is with headteachers but ime many refuse to ever acknowledge they've made a mistake. It's bizarre. I dare say if they apologised and told you how they would ensure this mistake wouldn't be made again it would have been left at that. Instead they've fobbed you off and could make the same mistake tomorrow, possibly with much worse consequences if its a life threatening allergy next time.

Given the complaints from some parents when a school insists on being nut free, imagine a school where your child couldn't take a sandwich in. Or biscuits, certain crisps, cake, some chocolate, things like cheaper sausages...

Aside from the potential health impact, sorry, but it's beyond rude and a total. Knobish thing to do, oh, you can't eat this, yum yum yum. Unbelievable.

Regarding the crumbs, I would have felt very uncomfortable.
School's response is shit.
Many of the replies on here are shit. It's not an over-reaction. Having a basically hidden and trivialised serious incurable disease that is routinely mocked is awful. Andthat fact it is downplayed and misunderstood is stressful enough for an adult, never mind for a parent sending their child out and hoping that the adults around her keep her safe.

How hard is it to just apologise if you messed up and not be an arse to begin with. 🙄

I think the response to this from the school was pretty poor. A sincere apology and a reassurance that their systems for this sort of thing are being looked at would be more appropriate.

the headteacher said she had forgotten that our daughter was Coeliac and that she wasn't wrong in doing this?

I have a few issues with this
1- she ‘forgot’ that the dd was coeliac. Theyll have various procedures in place to protect the dd, procedures SHE will have been involved in writing/putting in place. I’m surprised she forgot tbh. There won’t be that many pupils with the sane issue at the school.
2- I have an issue with taunting ‘come on, have some etc…’ when the dd reminded her about her allergy. It very simply wasn’t kind.
3- I have an issue with her pushing the dd to have some biscuits even after she reminded her she couldn’t have any. That’s a primary school child we are talking about. Children that age are tempted by what others have. Biscuits can look attractive. And tte long term effect if eating gluten might well not have sunk in as such. Which means primary school children are very likely to say when YES when pushed by an adult.
I mean you wouldn’t taunt a child with nut allergy with a biscuit that has peanut in. Why would you do that fir a coeliac child?? Dangerous imo.
4- with all of that, the dismissive attitude would get my back up tbh. And the ‘once again brushing thing under tte carpet’s is telling me it’s not the first time tte school has been cavalier either….

Your response here indicates you know nothing about cross contamination.

So they were teaching fractions with a biscuits, the biscuits was offered , your child declined

Really not seeing the issue

Why was the head unprofessional ? They didn't look at every kid's medical history every lesson. Celiac would not be something of concern in a normal classroom. The dinner staff need to know.

Do you think that teachers have time to read every single thing about a child before a lesson and remember every detail?

Jesus. No wonder there is such a huge teacher shortage

While I think the teacher was incredibly rude - I am a ceoliac and ceoliacs have a gluten intolerance not an allergy. Being in the presence of crumbs does not make use sick.

I have coeliac disease and one of the worse things about it can be other people's ignorant reactions as is so helpfully demonstrated on this thread. My sister often makes fun of me at family meals when I ask for the gluten free menu. It's really nasty and unsympathetic. I wouldn't have been bothered about the crumb spilling personally but making fun of your daughter in front of her classmates is totally out of order! If untreated we can end up with stomach cancer as gluten destroys the stomach lining. I was only diagnosed in my 40s, it's a horrible, annoying thing to have to live with and I'd imagine it's even worse for a teenager. I'd be taking the complaint further, looks at the Schools complaints policy and follow that.

I'm really surprised to hear the headteacher offers 1:1s and biscuits.

Perhaps they could offer peanuts for those with celiac?

I'd get the popcorn, personally

Just wow, this response is crazy. Would you feel the same if the teacher offered flipping cocaine, but it's ok because the kid didn't take it. A biscuit can KILL this child, I'd think it's important a teacher bloody well remember that tbh. Sorry Mr and Mrs X, I accidentally killed your daughter because there's just too many kids to keep track of 🤷‍♀️ never mind aye!