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Original poster

Do you think I should change my daugthers school?

28 replies

purplepinkflower · 02/04/2023 23:23

Hi there,

My daughter is in Blackheath High GDST school she loves her school and doesn’t prefer to move. She is there since nursery and she has lovely group of friends. We never had any problem with the school. She is extremely happy there. However I was thinking to apply Eltham College next year and I am sure she will have a place because she is super academic child which loves every single subjects. She is above avarage in all subjects and one of the best in her year group at the moment. She is naturally bright and self-motivated. At the moment she loves being in single sex environment, she feel comfortable and happy. But she would like to study a medicine at university in future so I believe she needs to be in more academic, selective school. Eltham College is bigger school so there are more pupil there who applies medicine and they also offer Oxbridge programme in 6th From. And their results are sligly better - dont know maybe this is why they are more selective.

College 2022 results are:
37% of GCSE grades were 9s (the highest grade) and nearly two-thirds of results were 9/8 grades and 85% of all grades were 9/8/7.

Blackheath High results are:
while 34% achieved 9s, 60% 8-9s, , %77 of all grades were 9/8/7.

Do you think its worth to move?

I also has some concerns that Eltham College was boys only school till 2020. And its not fully coed yet - %70 boys, %30 girls - also it is a Christian school and we are not Christian.
And unfortunately there is no direct bus or train to travel Eltham College from our place. So in this case we will need to drive her to school all the time or use school bus which is extra cost and needs a afford.

Meanwhile I have 2.5 years old daughter which might start Balackheath High School next year. We can not apply to Eltham College for her as first year entry is year 3 for Eltham College. Do you think it will be hard for me to manage it? Currently we live in Maze Hill so close to the Blackheath High School.

I will be happy if you share your ideas about this matter because I am so in dilemma. Thank you!!

OP posts:
Scutterbug · 02/04/2023 23:26

I see no reason to move her. The differences are minimal and she will thrive in an environment where she is happy which it sounds like she is.

Whatisthisanyidea · 02/04/2023 23:26

Don’t underestimate the value of friendships at this age.
Do the results matter if she’s on target as a high achiever?

What’s the real benefit for her moving?

Primrose44 · 03/04/2023 07:35

If she is happy don't move her.
It's not just about getting better results.
She has to get used to a whole new set of rules, layout, timings,teacher and cohort dynamics which is very unsettling especially if you've been pulled away from a happy place.
I made the mistake of moving my child although the circumstances were totally different.
We were overcrowded and had to move house but I moved her school as the journey would have been extremely long.
How I wish I'd kept her and she made the longer journey!
It's all worked out well now as she is moving to Brit but it's been an awful year for her.

Nimbostratus100 · 03/04/2023 07:39

never move a happy child for no reason

Rebecca8181 · 03/04/2023 09:38

I dont see any reason in your case to move your child. The results are so similar. My daughter also loves Blackheath. We had offers from JAGS and Alleyns but she chose Blackheath for easier commute and her mental health (she is bright child but doesnt like to have an pressure on). She was in prep in primary and she hated 5 & 6 because of 11+ stress so we wanted her to be relax and happy during a secondary. Dont move her. It is always a risk to move a happy child

Skiphopbump · 03/04/2023 09:43

I wouldn’t move a happy child especially when the current school already has excellent results.

Original poster
purplepinkflower · 03/04/2023 13:18

Thanks all for the comments. Actually all of my friends and family also told me that I shouldn’t move her because we are really happy with her current school Blackheath High. However, Eltham College known as more academic and selective school so I was thinking it might suits her more as she is so academically focused child —— She is my first child and I am unsure if that kind of environmet will have advantages or disadvantages for her

OP posts:
gwenneh · 03/04/2023 13:22

purplepinkflower · 03/04/2023 13:18

Thanks all for the comments. Actually all of my friends and family also told me that I shouldn’t move her because we are really happy with her current school Blackheath High. However, Eltham College known as more academic and selective school so I was thinking it might suits her more as she is so academically focused child —— She is my first child and I am unsure if that kind of environmet will have advantages or disadvantages for her

Academics don't exist in a vacuum and it's arguably much more difficult to gauge the social-emotional aspects of learning, so if your daughter is in a positive and supportive social environment it is definitely not worth trading that for negligible academic changes.

AlexiaR · 03/04/2023 13:35

purplepinkflower · 03/04/2023 13:18

Thanks all for the comments. Actually all of my friends and family also told me that I shouldn’t move her because we are really happy with her current school Blackheath High. However, Eltham College known as more academic and selective school so I was thinking it might suits her more as she is so academically focused child —— She is my first child and I am unsure if that kind of environmet will have advantages or disadvantages for her

If she is academically capable she will succeed where ever she is. However friendships form a very important aspect of young persons life , and if she loves her present school and has good friends there but loses these because of the move, she might be distracted, resentful and demotivated at the new school. Yes, academic achievements are a great thing, but a child’s overall happiness is actually much more important.

Genevieva · 03/04/2023 16:20

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Please don't under-estimate what you have. The stats you list do not equate to your child getting different grades at different institutions. It sounds like your daughter is achieving her potential at her current school. If she moves and is miserable she might not. Happiness is so important.

TwigTheWonderKid · 03/04/2023 17:05

Presumably the slightly better results at EC can at least in part, if not totally, be attributed to the fact the school is more selective? So it would seem crazy to move her from somewhere she is doing well and where she is happy?

Topseyt123 · 03/04/2023 17:12

The school she is at is good, with great results. DD is happy too.

Leave her where she is. You have no good reason to move her and can only cause disruption.

Tallulasdancingshoes · 03/04/2023 17:18

No reason to move her. It’s a good school and she’s happy and thriving. What makes you think she won’t be able to go and study medicine if she stays?

Original poster
purplepinkflower · 03/04/2023 17:38

Yes, its true. Eltham is more selective (first entry point is year 3) thats why their GCSE results are slightly better. I am just unsure if its an advantage for her to be in mix ability environment? -(Blackheath High entry point is nursery and girls dont need to do 11+ assesment to move senior)
and be one of the most academic student in her classroom? I must add that she is so happy and confident right now when she gets full marks from the assesments etc

OP posts:
Greenfree · 03/04/2023 17:44

I wouldn't move a happy child from their school. The only reason I would do this is if we were moving to a different city and my child been happy school would stop me from even doing that. Unsettling your daughter may cause her unnecessary stress

redskylight · 03/04/2023 17:49

purplepinkflower · 03/04/2023 17:38

Yes, its true. Eltham is more selective (first entry point is year 3) thats why their GCSE results are slightly better. I am just unsure if its an advantage for her to be in mix ability environment? -(Blackheath High entry point is nursery and girls dont need to do 11+ assesment to move senior)
and be one of the most academic student in her classroom? I must add that she is so happy and confident right now when she gets full marks from the assesments etc

Blackheath's results do not indicate that it's a mixed ability environment.
I think there are advantages to being in a mixed ability setting, but you're not in one. (It's highly likely that a child who was genuinely working below the academic level expected might be managed out).

Your DD sounds like she is doing great. Absolutely no point in moving her.

Cornishclio · 03/04/2023 17:52

While medicine courses do value academic results they look at extra curricular activities too. If she is happy and doing well I wouldn't move her.

Intergalacticcatharsis · 04/04/2023 14:57

You have 2 girls, you live in Maze Hill, you have a lovely local all girls school where one of your DD’s is already thriving. You have zero 11 plus worries because they can both go and stay there until 18 in theory.

If you move your older daughter, you split up your girls (don’t underestimate the advantage not just for you having your DDs in the same school but also for them and their relationship). If the older one is high achieving that rubs off on the younger one and they can look up to the older child in the same school and feel proud, also tend to be more confident starting there from day 1.

If you must move your DD1, then do it at the 11 plus stage or 13 plus. Or when the younger one is going into Year 3. At 11 plus, you can then visit Alleyns, Jags, Eltham, Sevenoaks School and the grammars and decide if it is worth moving her. You can even consider Westminster for 13 plus now as they are going co-ed. It will likely be the go to for gifted girls within commuting distance.

Why are you trying to make things more difficult for yourself at this stage? She is currently thriving and if she is doing so well, she can move schools later. Better to enjoy the young child stage fully and not stress about schooling too much. It all gets a lot more stressful at A level, uni application stage. KS1 and early KS2 are meant to be fun and easy for the whole family.

Whattt44 · 04/04/2023 15:00

If it ain't broke, don't fix it .

Original poster
purplepinkflower · 04/04/2023 21:33

Thanks you all.

OP posts:
Original poster
purplepinkflower · 04/04/2023 21:34

@Intergalacticcatharsis good point! I also need to think about my little one and their relationship x

OP posts:
Original poster
purplepinkflower · 04/04/2023 21:34

@Whattt44 👍🏻

OP posts:
Original poster
purplepinkflower · 04/04/2023 21:37

@redskylight yes, actually we are so happy with the school - They help students a lot, they do regular assessments to check students stages but its definitely not a pushy school. Its so balanced. I didn’t meet any student which doesn’t like Blackheath High.

OP posts:
Original poster
purplepinkflower · 04/04/2023 21:39

@Greenfree true x

OP posts:
converseandjeans · 05/04/2023 09:41

You would be mad to move her. It sounds like she is really happy & results at Blackheath are well above average (and not much different to the other school).

Does she want to do medicine or have you decided that she should?

If she was at an underperforming comprehensive where lots of students were getting less than grade 4s passes then it would be different.

You do sound quite pushy and overly obsessed with grades.

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