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SE London - A levels in current all girls school or move to mixed school?

29 replies

selondonmummyyy · 21/03/2023 17:53

Hello,

My DD is in year 11. She is currently in all-through GDST single sex school. She did mock exams this year and her teachers told us that they are expecting grade 9s and 8s from her in each subjects, which is great. With these grades she can easily move to other mixed independent schools or selective state schools (she has some offers already). Her current school is so close to our place. She walk to the school usually and when the weather is rainy she took bus (3 stops). My DD joined her current school in year 7 and so far we had no problem. I only want her to change the school just because I want her to move to coed school. She does drama and dance classes in in the weekends and never had any problem with mixing boys. She is actually very confident and independent girl but somehow I always felt like she need to move to mixed school before university. But she says the opposite - she mentioned us that; if she stays in her current school she doesn’t need to spend time to make new friends - she feels like settling new school with new classmates and teachers might be risky. She feels like she will do better if she stays in her current school. And she doesn’t want to change her environment for 2 years only for A levels. She said that she just want to focus on her studies in September and she doesn’t want to move somewhere new at the moment. Btw she is so kind and friendly girl so I don’t believe she will have any issues at all. She loves her current school and I think this is the main reason she doesn’t want to move.

Is anybody experienced something similar?

Do you think we should let her stay in her current all girls school for A levels?

Meanwhile she can move to mixed schools like; Colfe’s, Eltham College, St Dunstans College or Alleyns.

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 21/03/2023 19:28

heavens, if a happy high performing child 16 year old wants to stay where she is, let her! She doesn't need the distractions of new friends and boys if she is happy. Thousands of kids manage to go to Uni having been to single sex schools, and it sounds like she's mixing outside school already. Leave her be!

BendingSpoons · 21/03/2023 19:34

She likes school
She is doing well
It is close to home

Don't move her! She can mix with males in other ways or later. Other schools may be more competitive but that doesn't mean she will do any worse at her current school.

cocksstrideintheevening · 21/03/2023 19:43

Why would you move her? Most sixth forms have events with corresponding boys' schools anyway. Seems an odd think to worry about.

cocksstrideintheevening · 21/03/2023 19:44

Is she at JAGS? I wouldn't move her
From there
For any of the schools you mention.

parietal · 21/03/2023 19:44

definitely let her stay where she is happy. it is hard work settling into a new school and can really throw off your A-levels.

she will have plenty of time to be in a co-ed environment at university.

selondonmummyyy · 21/03/2023 20:41

@cocksstrideintheevening no it is one of GDST girls only school in South East London

OP posts:
selondonmummyyy · 21/03/2023 20:41

@parietal thats what my DD says!

OP posts:
NeverDropYourMooncup · 21/03/2023 20:44

She's got plenty of time to learn to deal with males in a learning environment at university. Let her have the next two years undisturbed if that's what she wants.

MadMadMadamMim · 21/03/2023 20:49

Don't' move her for goodness sake. She's happy and doing well. And doesn't want to move.

Why would you risk her happiness and potential for good grades by shifting her to another school where she might make no friends, might be bullied, might struggle, might not like the new teachers she has?

I can't see any benefits. (I say this as an A level teacher). To meet boys? Not a good enough reason...

Newpuppymummy · 21/03/2023 20:52

I don’t understand why you would consider moving a happy, settled 16 year old who didn’t want to move.

LindorDoubleChoc · 21/03/2023 20:55

Respect her choice!

rattlinbog · 21/03/2023 20:56

Keep her where she is! She is doing well and is happy there.

Fudgewomble · 21/03/2023 21:01

My DS is at one of the schools you mention. I’m going to hazard a guess at which GDST she’s at and would say only move her if the extra curriculars would be a real bonus eg music at Eltham or CCF at Colfes or dunstans, or she wanted a slightly bigger A level class for her chosen subject or more specialist teachers or a particular sport (eg a school with a pool and waterpolo if she doesn’t have that where she is now). I think it really will come down to her specific A level choices and extracurriculars.

NancyJoan · 21/03/2023 21:06

They cover a huge amount of content in the first term of Year 12. If she moves, she needs to be getting to know staff, they need to get to know her, she need to make a whole new group of friends, build a new routine etc. If you leave her where she is, she can get on with her studies. I can’t think of any reason to move a happy, studious girl who can easily walk to school.

Quartz2208 · 21/03/2023 21:10

Let her? Why do you think this is your choice to make. She is 16 and as long as the choices she makes are not absurd/dangerous or stupid they are her choices to make. Not yours.

Support her choices and don’t force a decision that you th8nk she should make

selondonmummyyy · 21/03/2023 21:14

@Fudgewomble she would like to study biology, maths and chemistry so its nothing to do with extracurriculars. Her current school is smaller than schools I mentioned above. She feels like home in there - I know she loves all of her teachers and peers, which is a bonus. But I always planned a bigger and coed school for her. But ofcourse in the end its her choice, I respect her.

OP posts:
selondonmummyyy · 21/03/2023 21:18

@Quartz2208 I want the best for my child. Ofcourse its her choice and she will decide in the end but I wanted to ask here to know about other parents ideas and experiences. What is wrong with that!?

OP posts:
BrainOnFire · 21/03/2023 21:22

I was at a girls only school and turned down the opportunity to go to a mixed sixth form. Have always been happy with my decision.

selondonmummyyy · 21/03/2023 21:23

@BrainOnFire thanks for sharing your experience

OP posts:
Quartz2208 · 21/03/2023 21:36

selondonmummyyy · 21/03/2023 21:18

@Quartz2208 I want the best for my child. Ofcourse its her choice and she will decide in the end but I wanted to ask here to know about other parents ideas and experiences. What is wrong with that!?

because your initial post didn’t say that it said should we let her which isn’t saying you need to let her decide.
But why do you need to know about others experiences. There will be a mixture as both are valid choices and each works for different people.

but hasn’t she already decided - are you trying to change her mind with this.

Stopsnowing · 21/03/2023 22:42

Some kids need a change for sixth form but your child doesn’t want or need that. Count your lucky stars she is happy settled and succeeding!!

TJsAunt · 22/03/2023 10:50

Are you holding offers from all of those schools for Y12 in September? You need to decide quite quickly or you'll be liable for a term's fees in addition to any deposit you've already paid.

If she's happy with her current school despite looking at all the other options, then you should leave her where she is IMO

lanthanum · 22/03/2023 10:55

My DD made an unexpected choice for sixth form, but it turns out to be absolutely the right place for her. Trust your daughter.

IDontWantToBeAPie · 22/03/2023 13:13

Girls do better academically in same sex schools. If she's happy leave her be. She doesn't need to meet boys

Passerillage · 22/03/2023 13:17

Don't move her. She is happy and has explained why. The only conceivable reason to move her might be so that she would be applying to uni from a state school, but honestly if a child is as happy as she is now, I wouldn't rock the boat.

She's going to be in co-ed environments for the rest of her life. She doesn't need to be "exposed" to boys for any imaginable reason.

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