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My DD doesnt want to change her school! Is there any advantages for an a child to carry on in same school for senior?

34 replies

jiane · 16/02/2023 08:23

Hi there,

We have 3 daughters and they all go to same girls only independent school. DD1 is in Senior side and DD2 and DD3 in junior side. Senior and junior side of school are in different building but they are so close to each other.

All my daughters loves their school and they are all doing amazing academically. But DD3 is so academic focus, she always been really well above avarage from all subjects.

My husband belives she deserves to be in more academic school. Because she is basically top of her class who loves all subjects. She is in year 2 now and she practice year 4 maths at home with her sister (DD2) and she manages to to do calculations. She reads like an adult and loves art, drama, sport and gymnastic. She is also so social - she loves her feiends and teachers and they do love her as well so that she doesnt want to move school. She now received few offers for 7+.

The new school is coed and 4 miles away from her current school - I need to think about the that because I will have 2 DDs in that school. At the moment I do drive for their school its only 1.5 miles away but if my DD3 moves to other school I will need to arrange transport for my older daughters (school bus) I don’t prefer them to travel on their own but the public transport because I feel they are still young especially my DD2 and also as I mentioned before their school buildings are not the same.

Do you think it is worth to change her school?

I spoke with her tutor last term and her tutor said if she continues like that she might even get a full bursary, scholarship from her current school for senior. She also mentioned that she see her a head girl of school in 10 years. This is not just because she is so academic she is also so good socially and talented in sport, art, drama and gymnastic. Well actually no-one can tell what will happen in 5-10 years but I just wanted to add for you to have an idea if I should move her etc…

May I learn if its has advantage for child to carry on in same school for senior?

I will so gratefully if you advise me what I should do?

Thank you.

OP posts:
Heightyheight · 16/02/2023 08:27

She’s only in year 2, OP! You’ve all put a lot of projected future on her little shoulders!

What does she want?

If it were my child, I’d keep her in the same school as her sisters where she’s clearly thriving.

LIZS · 16/02/2023 08:30

There is a lot to be said for keeping logistics simple especially for youngest. She is still very young, yet to try most subjects in any depth and develop strengths and weaknesses. If she needs more stretch at 10 than the school offers reconsider it then.

Sirzy · 16/02/2023 08:30

She is still so young. Let her enjoy being 7 and develop without adding pressures academically to her. She is enjoying school and learning at the moment which is the most important thing.

TeenDivided · 16/02/2023 08:32

Surely the best thing would be to keep her where she is for Juniors, and then in preparation for Seniors take her to look at other options. She will be more mature by then and more able to have sensible discussions.

DazzlePaintedBattlePants · 16/02/2023 08:32

I wouldn’t move, but would consider moving at 11. The logistics would be a pain and Y2 is still very young. There will be girls who will be later starters, or who won’t have been tutored young, who will catch up and by 11 you will have a better idea of where she really is in her cohort, and therefore be able to find the best fit for her.

How do you think she would cope not being top dog? Some children like being the big fish in the small pond - not saying that’s the case here, but she’s clearly doing well so mess with that at your peril.

Patchworksack · 16/02/2023 08:36

Why are you paying for a private school if you think it can’t adequately educate and stretch a bright seven year old?? Keep her where she is and reassess for senior school.

Sprogletsmum2 · 16/02/2023 08:36

Your dd sounds like mine. She's just good at everything. My thoughts on this is to push her outside the academic, so she's playing instruments and football, she's joined cubs. I would 100% keep her at the same school as her sisters, the shared life experience is so valuable.

piggijg · 16/02/2023 08:38

No way I'd change schools for a 7 year old. Her school should be able to stretch her just fine. If you did you'd make your life far more complicated and you'd well and truly screw up the dynamic between the sisters.

Bimblybomeyelash · 16/02/2023 08:41

Why move her from a school where she is thriving?

FirstnameSuesecondnamePerb · 16/02/2023 08:43

If she is flourishing, why move her?
She sounds like she will get good grades and is naturally bright. The only thing that could mess with that is to move her to a school where she is less happy!

MumOf2workOptions · 16/02/2023 08:45

I wouldn't move her if she's doing well and is happy, plus it gives you a potential logistical nightmare!!
I'd keep her where she is personally.

saraclara · 16/02/2023 08:46

If you have three kids, what you don't want is for one of them to be the odd one out. So no, don't make make her 'the special one' who deserves a better school than the other two. That could have life long ramifications for her.

Also she's seven. At that age one of my DDs was head and shoulders above the rest of her cohort academically. But over time others caught up, and by the time she left school, while still bright and a good all rounder, she didn't stand out in the way she had at seven. So don't put too much pressure on your DD.

ButteryNuts · 16/02/2023 08:48

I'd keep her in the same school. For all the reasons others have said.

LittleBearPad · 16/02/2023 08:49

She’s only 7. Why not reassess at 11.

fdgdfgdfgdfg · 16/02/2023 08:55

She's happy where she is. Surely her happiness trumps the other considerations?

Moonlaserbearwolf · 16/02/2023 09:05

When the time comes to consider senior options (not for a few years yet!) I wouldn’t necessarily move her to a more academic school. There can be huge confidence advantages to being top of the class.

As said above, many children (including me) thrive as big fish in a small pond. Extremely able friends of mine who went to the highly academic girls school ended up believing they were academically mediocre (they weren’t!) and struggled with their mental health. Others can of course thrive, but moving a child from a school they love is always a risk.

2bazookas · 16/02/2023 09:41

I'd keep her where she is so happy and doing well both socially and academically.That golden combination lays a lifetime foundation of good mental health and personal confidence.

About academic standards
A very academically-able child will get the best possible examination results whatever school they attend.

She won't be the only very academically-bright kid in her secondary classes. So in class teaching terms, teachers will set that little group together to spark off and stimulate each other ; and IME the very best teachers took huge pleasure in letting the high fliers soar high and wide.

Sadlifter · 16/02/2023 09:44

She's 7 and the youngest of three. She will almost certainly seem older than her peers.

The only thing that would put me off the school is the ridiculous comment about being head girl.

ItchyBillco · 16/02/2023 09:46

If it were my child, I’d keep her in the same school as her sisters where she’s clearly thriving.

Agree with this. Readdress when she’s about to go to the upper school.

louise5754 · 16/02/2023 10:02

I've not heard of senior.

My kids have reception. Infants. Juniors. Then secondary school.

louise5754 · 16/02/2023 10:05

Ignore my post.

SnoozyLucy7 · 16/02/2023 10:14

But she is only 7. She is so young and loving her school. She’s bright and will probably do really well where ever she is. Obviously, you want the best for her but why put additional pressure, to academically excel, on a child so young who is thriving and happy?

And what’s potentially becoming a head girl have anything to do with it?

Sadlifter · 16/02/2023 10:20

Sounds like trying to persuade them to stay to me. Who knows how many other brainy, sociable girls would be a better fit for head girl in 10 years time??

Bronzeisthecolour · 16/02/2023 10:33

I wouldn't move her. She's doing well and with her sisters. Also dont get too carried away with how brilliant she is at 7, I'm sure she is but lot's of kids catch up in years 4-6 as they mature and their reading skills all level off.
I'd ignore the head girl comment- she's 7! Very odd for a teacher to be making those predictions about all the children.
Ask the school to extend and challenge her- they should already be doing so. Moving a child who is use to being the best into an environment we're she's one of the crowd can really knock confidence so please do think why you are doing it- for her or you?

Seeline · 16/02/2023 10:42

I'd keep her where she is for now. Look again for senior school, although obviously you'll be needing to think about that in Y4/5 as presumably she'll need to prep for entrance exams.
I think sometimes all-through schools are nor necessarily a good thing - it's good to experience different environments. Children also change and develop and what might seem the best school for them at 4 may not be so at 11 or 16. It's always worth considering the options.
I would also consider the all girls environment versus the co-ed. Girls tend to do better in a single sex learning environment.