7+ school far from where we live

[Autumninnewyork]

DH wants to send DD to an excellent school, starting Year 3, that is in a different part of London to where we live. Children will be coming from all parts of London but also lots local to the school. The school is a feeder for an outstanding secondary school. No guarantee of entry but 99% of children fro the junior school go to the senior school. Does anyone have experience of this working or does it end up being a massive problem socially for children who live far from their schools? My own school wasn’t amazing but people travelled up to half an hour or so to get there (not in London) and I managed to see my friends for sleepovers at the weekends etc so I’m not sure if I’m worrying unduly ps all the school I’m talking about are independent/fee paying

Anyone?

Do you mean Bute House? That's probably the only school worth travelling for. If so, for Bute or for any others your dd needs to pass the 7+ first of all. The school will look at your home address and they may not make an offer if they think the commute is too far for your dd.

What's the school and where do you live? completely pointless post without that information. People will know the journey.

It’s actually a DS, not a DD. The school is Westminster and we live on the Orpington train line to Victoria in zone 3. The journey itself isn’t really the problem. It’s the distance/social aspect

It's so incredibly hard to get a place at Westminster 7plus I would focus on that instead. Which other schools are you sitting to give your ds other options?

Also are you In a pre-prep school that sends ds to Westminster or do you have a tutor that is advising you?

We have a tutor. I know how tough it is academically and have that coveted to the extent that anyone can. It really is whether it is the best thing for a child to go to a great school that is less local or stay local for prep and try at 11+ for a variety of places. If he first get in now he’ll just stay where he is. We are looking at 2 x 7+ schools but he can also stay where he is

If he doesn’t get in now, that should say

@Autumninnewyork , Westminster will offer a place to your ds if he is academically excellent in all areas and has the personality they are looking for. If he ticks these boxes it's the school for him and the rich education he will receive will balance out the social benefits of walking to school / having local friends. I would focus of this rather than worrying about if he gets in how you will manage his friendships.

Ps - if he does get a place you will find some of his cohort have houses in the country and don't live in London from Friday afternoon until Monday morning.

The journey itself isn’t really the problem.

OP, Are you really sure about that? SHE IS ONLY 7! She will travel from Orpington to Westminster every day twice. That’s so tiring! Its hot house school I bet she will have homework to do every day after school as well - Can you imagine her life?! She will not gona have time to attend any after school clubs etc… Ok we want best for our kids, ofcourse! … but best academic school doesn’t mean best school for each child! They need to enjoy life while they are studying!
I wish you the best but I am sure she will be much happier even in local less academic school! Because if she is unhappy, tierd, bored etc.. you can not except her to achieve the her potential even if she is in the top school!

Do you mean Westminstet under school? It's boys only! What Westminster are you talking about?

Oh sorry missed your correction on sex!

The DS is only travelling from zone 3 on that route, and just a brief walk at the London end.

my dcs all went to local schools which worked well for them (and state, not independent, but that’s down to luck of having good local options).

A journey from zone 3 to Westminster would be easily doable and unlikely to result in isolation or lack of friends going forwards. There will be a number of boys coming from his neck of the woods - assume you’re near dulwich, herne hill etc?

I have friends with dc that travel around an hour plus (albeit from the age of 11) to go to grammar school that has an 8am start. By bus, with all the associated congestion/traffic/roadworks difficulties thrown up from time to time. That would not have been a remotely happy experience for my dcs.
but, for example, my DH travelled from zone 6 to dulwich every day for school from age 7 and he seems unscathed and to have a solid group of friends who also lived locally and got the same train.

Orpington to Victoria daily commute at age 7 sounds horrendous to me! For him and for the adult accompanying him. It would take a huge chunk out of the adult's day?

If he's happy where he is then why not leave him until 11 and then move. There are spots at Westminster under at 11 which would then continue on at 13. He could manage the commute solo by then?

@ChnandlerBong agree!

Thanks so much everyone for taking the time to reply. Just to clarify, the commute isn’t from Orpington itself, which i agree would be crazy and exhausting for a 7 year old. It’s that train line, travelling from London zone 3. I don’t want to be too specific but just clarifying that it is one direct train journey, rather than changes between different forms of transport or a long car journey in traffic etc

It’s a no from me. WUS involves a lot of homework and a lot of clubs. A long commute on top is the last thing little boys need.

My brother got into WUS at 11+. Send him to a loc school where he'll meet a broad variety of kids from different backgrounds (not just mega rich) then send to WUS/another prep at 11+! I work in a similar school and the state primary kids are often much sparkier.