non-smart phone for 11yo

[surreymother1]

So dd is going to secondary school in September. Having to travel by train by herself so I want her to have a phone for emergencies, but don't want a smartphone and all the potential hazards that might entail. Has anyone else given their child a non-smart phone? Does anyone have any recommendations? Also is it possible to get GPS on one? I am thinking probably not, but would be great if it was possible.

I'd love to know how Smart Phones now cause ADHD and autism.

This thread alone has shown the myriad number of benefits they can have.

My kids are not getting a phone until they are 14.

All schools I've looked at for secondary ban phones. Some use MSTeams for homework but that's accessible by laptop at home.

Until we stop behaving like sheep, nothing will change. And yet all the evidence of the impact phones are having on our children is staring us in the face. I look at kids glued to their phones, and shudder.

They are addictive, commercially driven assets that Apple and all the other software and hardware companies are making a mint from. We are utter idiots.

When I left husband and moved DS was 9 - got him brick phone to contact his dad and dad family. After about 2 weeks of him struggling with it I gave him my iPhone. He found it easier to contact his family. Never had any issues of over/inappropriate use.

neither of us could easily send a text with brick phone,

But why would you want it to change? @CoQ10

It's not going to - tech and social media is here to stay. It will evolve and develop and this generation will be the ones working in those fields in the future. What is sheep like about embracing it rather than fearing it?

DD is taking creative media production and infotech as two of her GCSE options. The hours of fun spent making TikTok videos and messing about with apps mean she's way ahead and on track for top grades.

How on earth is a 14 or 16 year old even going to know that they could have a career in this area or choose it as an option if they're the only kid in the class who has no clue how to use technology that the rest have at their fingertips?

Yes the schools ban phones in school. You're deluded if you think that means the kids don't have phones.

Social ostracism is a high price to pay

We were all deluded in the 60s and 70s when smoking was the social norm, and we had no idea of the harm it was doing to us.

It's no different. We are a living experiment (or our kids are) and I do not believe my children need a smart phone until they are old enough to understand a) how addictive they are and b) what they must avoid.

Please, by all means show me the research that states that 10 year old children benefit from having a smartphone any more than a 14 year old does.

One-third of 10 year olds have accessed porn on their phones. I don't want that for my children.

Incidentally, my children have access to tech at home on laptops and ipads under my supervision. So they are not missing out.

get an iPhone and go all in on the parental controls. Then you can restrict or time-limit the stuff you are concerned about.

I agree with others that it’s pretty tough on the kids who have Nokias when they start secondary, as it does set them up for bullying.

Not sure why you're talking about 10 year olds. I'm totally in agreement with you there. Kids don't need phones until secondary

Totally agree - smart phones totally unnecessary until secondary, then they become essential.

And they don't need to be glued 24/7. If they're doing other activities - sport, music etc then it can be very balanced. Parental controls are very useful too.

Plus far easier to monitor 11/12/13 than a 14+

If you ban altogether, don't be surprised if they end up with an illicit phone. DD and a lot of her friends get a new handset every 2 years when parents upgrade theirs. I know of more than a few children who now have smartphones with no sim that they can use on WIFI where friends have passed on their old handset.

Those suggesting 14 for phones, how will your dc make plans for out of school with friends? Arrange days out into town, sleepovers etc?

Sure back in "our day" you'd pick up the landlines but most houses don't have landlines, and most under 30 don't actually like voice calls. Also, most plans are made outside of school or change frequently.

Being able to WhatsApp your friendship group is hands down the easiest way for teens to communicate when not face to face.

Exactly. I'm guessing the people who are saying what they're 'going to do' don't have teenagers and haven't really thought through the practicalities. I'm sure it's quite hard to imagine your 4 year old going out with their mates but it will happen.

I honestly would love those saying 14 to update this thread when their dc get to 14 and say how it worked out.

If it worked out for you, genuinely, fantastic. But it's hard to see how it would.

Dd is 11 and she get her smartphone the Christmas of Year 6. It worked well for us as she is young enough to simply accept that we block lots, check messages and keep an eye on group chats. She has WhatsApp, but no tiktok or Snapchat yet. We have a few simple rules - no phones at meals or after bedtime, she isn't allowed to delete any messages she sends, and we can and will check it randomly when we feel like we want or need to.

A Y7 without a smartphone will miss out on socialising etc. I wish it wasn't like that, but it is.

i’m surprised to see so many parents saying she’ll be the only child without a smart phone which is absolute nonsense. My DD goes to West London high achieving independent school with a huge range of children and a lot of her friends do not have a phone at all. Or have a basic Nokia phone as the school is very against smart phone use all the work is on a cloud system so can be accessed from any computer at home and they’re incredibly strict about phone usage so it has not been an issue for year seven friends. I would say a good third of them don’t have a phone or have a very basic one. I believe the tide in social media usage is turning in the next generation and a lot of them are a lot more aware of the dangers. I wouldn’t feel peer pressured into getting a phone but I would agree if she’s travelling on her own Perhaps get her a simple smart phone and disable lots of features you don’t want her to use which is what we have done and it’s been very successful so far as another poster above, I do regular spot checks on the phone and don’t allow mass WhatsApp groups which has worked out well .

Thank you for sharing this.

Look at the station timetable?
Ring mum on his Nokia and tell her?

We all survived harrowing childhoods without phones didn't we?!?!?

Unbelievable how so many people judge a parent for thinking ( very wisely) not to give a smartphone to their children. In US more and more parents are opting for dumb smartphones ( with no internet and data) for their children. Follow Screenstrong page and website. Highly recommended. More and more research is proving smartphones are literally ruining the mental health of an entire generation and parents have the power to wait until children are older