asshole teacher, daughter worrying about going back to school

[briarrose]

My DD (10) has this evil literacy teacher at school, who since the beginning of the year has terrorised the class. I've already been to see the headmistress once because of it. My DD has always previously done well at school and has not been in trouble, but because of this teacher my DD and a few other classmates began cooking up a plan to do bad work so that they would be moved down a set in literacy just to avoid this teacher. When I spoke to the headteacher she was very understanding and predictably defended the teacher in question, but did speak to her about it. Since then it has improved slightly; the teacher has now actually started using DDs name instead of calling her "that girl there" as far as I am aware some more parents have complained, although that is just a rumour, i'm hoping that that will open the headteachers eyes. Until then, does anybody have any tips on how to build up DDs confidence so that she can handle the lessons? I have told her I will give it a week and then I will go back in if I need to but she is still sweating about it, she is quite timid at school

Could you do some light hearted writing together at home, something like a funny poem or storys... if you gave her lots of praise for it or she took it to school to show a more favoured teacher, this may help her confidence.

Not really sure otherwise. The teacher sounds awful, but try to focus on the positives about the lessons with your daughter.

It's so sad ..one never wants to "diss" teachers in front of our children but sometimes it's so hard to be supportive and encouraging unless we do. I like vixen's suggestion. But otherwise just telling her that you're behind her all the way should help, no? Plus I would say go to the headteacher again? Nothing will get done otherwise. Keep on it. Make a note of every unreasonable act. Present regularly to head. I am quite stroppy though but I have achieved results in this way. I really hope she has a good first day on Monday.

your poor dd

i had 3 seperate phonecall's from teachers in one week due to a comment i made in her student planner about the standards of teaching at dd's school - they were very concerned about my views!!! - so i would say keep on making a noise and you will be listened to - i know they moan about pay BUT teachers actually get paid a lot of money to educate our kids so we must make sure they are doing their jobs properly

Not a nice situation for young children. Growing up is hard enough without things like this going on.
I'm glad you spoke to headteacher, but yes, she would have to defend the teacher.
You could point out to your DD that she only has to 'use' the teacher to learn from, not to like. I'm a teacher, and I often tell children to 'use' teachers when they complain that they don't like Miss so-and-so. It gives the pupils the idea that they are getting one-up on the teacher without their work suffering.
On the other hand, I am tempted to start a thread entitled 'asshole kids, teacher dreading going back to school', but that just applies to a few kids that I have the pleasure of teaching! A class of eager-to-learn 10 year olds sounds like Heaven to me (I teacher disaffected teenagers) - your DD's teacher should be pleased!

wow hard knock
that "using the teacher" idea is a totally new one to me
I like it a lot

what does the teacher do?

Well done you for standing up for your daughter. That believe me is the most important thing in all of this - she knows you won't let her be hurt by this nasty teacher and are taking her seriously.

I speak as someone who went through a year when I was 8 with a really evil class teacher, who favouritised, condemned, humiliated and bullied most of the class.

My parents just told me she must have a secret sorrow and never tried to sort it out really. They were too afraid of the system.

I was traumatised and had nervous ticks and eating problems/school phobia for years afterwards. I never really recovered but that was more about not feeling my parents could protect me than the actual experience iyswim.

So you are doing the right thing!

Btw the woman who was awful to me was eventually fired for being a b*tch to the children, but it was too late for many of us.

I would second the 'using' idea.

Also what I have told Ds in some situations, is that he should do what the teacher says but think whatever he likes, so they get the idea he is not a threat or naughty but all the time he is thinking 'she is silly' or 'that doesn't make sense'. He doesn't have to like the teacher, or respect her inwardly, iyswim.

Hi...Can I suggest you speak to the teacher in question about your DD. Some teachers think they are using productive teaching methods by addressing kids in certain ways when in fact they are scaring the lifes out of them. There was a teacher at my DD's school and I nicknamed her the witch but after speaking to her I found a different story as to what she was doing and explained it to DD and she ended up being one of the best ever teachers.
Your poor DD has had all xmas to mull over it and probably scared herself silly. With any luck she will have a good first day back.

Yes I like the idea about doing work with her D has noticed that certain children in the class are the only ones to get rewards. This teacher is awful, she holds up children's work in front of the class for the class to see how "bad" it is, she actually did this with my DDs work and said to the class "Isn't this pathetic" I was horrified, not to mention how my DD was feeling. the head said "well at least she was only calling the work pathetic and not your DD", my response was still a completely inappropriate word to use!!
I can fully understand that the head would need to defend the teacher, and I have the utmost respect for teachers in general, but I am training to be one myself and cannot understand how any teacher can think they can get results by terrifying children.
I'm too scared to speak to her myself.
Yes, the comment about telling her she only needs to "use" the teacher is a good one. As is the one about making notes, I guess if I do need to go back in about it I will have a proper list of issues.
As it was, DD didn't have that teacher today, she was thrilled! what does that say!!