Child given ADHD medication unnecessarily

[beatrice82]

Does anyone have experience of a child being given medicine for ADHD when they don't really have this condition? I think there's been a misdiagnosis because when I spend time with this child in an educational setting, I don't see any ADHD behaviours. His parents are at the end of their tether when them at home though. I would say this is more likely because of lack of boundaries. I wasn't asked what my observations of him in school are, which I find odd as I spend 3 days a week working with this child. I'm sad he's being medicated and hope it doesn't change his personality. Will he be ok? ☹️

Well done for taking it all on board (and on the chin). Lots of these posts were harsh and will have been hard to swallow but it comes from most of us having had to face ignorance and judgement on a daily basis all the while trying to get some help for our children. It makes it a million times harder when the people you need to ask for help are disbelieving and ill informed. So thank you for deciding to change that about yourself. The child you work with will benefit from you deciding to inform yourself.

OP:
" I know plenty of children with ADHD and I don't believe this child has it. "

Changed your tune.

How a school has allowed someone like the OP, who is so uneducated about a condition, and worse still so judgemental, to look after a SN child, is worrying. Really worrying.

Op, I work with families who may be like yours and as another Op suggested earlier their is a strong genetic component to neurodiversity. What I see time and time again is parents who probably have ADHD/ASD themselves constantly patronised about their parenting, even when they are begging for help. There is very little social care, nonsupport where it should be to help families. On top of this, judgmental professionals blaming poor parenting, yet no one has stopped to question whether a. The child actually has that diagnosed condition and B. Whether the parent may have. The pressure on parents mental health is enormous. Imagine perhaps having difficulty reading, writing and researching the conditions you suspect, but because of dyslexia, you couldn’t read or understand, you may also have difficulty with organisation. School thinks you are a poor parent so your mental health is impacted. It is very easy to typecast a parent as rubbish (it has happened to me) but actually you are misunderstood. I was able to read around and prove the school wrong, but what to parents who cannot? Professionals listen to school, blame the parents for FII and potentially stop the child from getting the support/diagnosis they need because they ‘know’ better.

I am glad you have taken on board everyone’s comments - but please think more closes about the parent blaming.

@beatrice82 well done for taking everything on board and search for a better education to support your 121, one more thing though, if I had a pound for every time a helpful TA, senco, teacher.... suggested that maybe my autistic child social anxiety would disappear if I had a couple of children for tea.... some others have been brilliant, helping on the little things, well, little to you, but to him meant a lot

@Coronawireless

Some weird replies here OP. I’m betting a couple of the very hostile responders have had questions asked about their own parenting. In some cases unfairly but in others possibly not….

That's your takeaway from this thread? That those who are defensive are so because they're bad parents, not because they have had to deal with people who believe what the OP stated she believed in her first post? Unbelievable.

My son was diagnosed with ADHD a few weeks ago. He's 6. In school he behaves well, and masks his impulsive behaviours. His ADHD manifests mainly as horrendous lack of attention in the classroom so he doesn't learn anything unless it via 1-1 teaching. At home he's the complete opposite and we're on breaking point most days. He desperately needs medication.
Reading your posts has really upset me, I think you need to do your own research instead of coming up with misconceptions.

Well done OP it takes a brave person to admit their mistakes

Although I must say a 360 turn from ‘screw you unkind posters’

I’m baffled that you think you were qualified to be in the diagnosis process yet you have less than the basic knowledge of SEN
How did that make sense to you OP?!

@catterycatcat
Yes. The unnecessary aggression, swearing and insults to the OP and her profession lead me to suspect that some of you may not be the best parents.

Well @Coronawireless your comments here lead me to suspect that you are similarly ignorant as the OP was and believe ADHD is down to shit parenting and just didn’t like being disabused of this notion.

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

Well *@Coronawireless* your comments here lead me to suspect that you are similarly ignorant as the OP was and believe ADHD is down to shit parenting and just didn’t like being disabused of this notion.

Nope.

You wouldn't see the need for our son's ADHD meds at home, but it's become really apparent it's needed in school. Some kids experience problems in one setting much more than the other, either because they are masking in one (school) and can let rip more in the other (home), or because they find one challenging (school) and the other doesn't have the same issues of lots of distraction and having to pay attention (home)

Nope

It doesn’t matter what you say. It’s what I believe based on your posts.

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

Nope

It doesn’t matter what you say. It’s what I believe based on your posts.

Ha ha ok believe away. For some people belief is more important than knowledge.

Glad you said that.

It is also very difficult to get long-lasting consistent coverage with medication. You can get a rebound when the medication is wearing off. It can cut appetite so you want to give it after breakfast, for example, so they will eat breakfast and try to finish early enough before dinner so they can eat dinner properly. I think it can keep some children awake at night as well if their last dose was too close to bedtime although we didn't have this problem. We never medicated in the weekends or holidays unless there was actually homework or swotting to be done.

If you now some empathy for the child because you are learning more about ADHD, please think again about the attitudes you and the school seem to be expressing about this family and their home life that you seem to look down on - please reconsider and show them the same respect you show their child.

They will be seeing a different side to their child. They saw them growing up, developing differently to their peers, having different home lives to their parent group friends, homes that were disrupted by emotional breakdowns, sleep issues, eating issues, sensitivity processing issues, any of the myriad of issues that these children can go through. All the time not understanding what’s going on and trying to get help. Watching your child be distressed all the time is torture.

They have probably spent years trying to get support and help from educationalists who believe it was because of what they were doing as he was not like it in school. They probably don’t feel that warm towards school because of it. They spent years getting the right assessments for their child, got believed, proved right by clinicians and yet some people in school still don’t believe them! You can guess what this feels like based on some of the responses from parents you’ve received on here!

If there is a genetic component, the parents may have unmet needs relating to similar conditions but are doing their best. Or have issues based on how they have spent years of their lives poorly treated when in school by people who were not well informed about the condition. Or have other children with issues too which compounded would make most home lives appear even more unusual to a NT outsider.

Im so pleased you chose to learn more to help this child and I’m hopeful that you won’t be so judgemental about children you work with in future. I’m just asking that in future, try to look outside of the narrow bit that you see and imagine what they as a family see.

OP I’m so pleased to see that you have taken on board what many PPs with lived experience of ADHD have said on this thread. It’s certainly clear which few posters don’t have this lived experience.

We’ve known from birth that DS1 was highly likely to have multiple disabilities including ASD and ADHD. He has been under paediatrics/children’s services since day 1. And yet he went to a primary school - which at the time was rated Outstanding by OFSTED and was regarded as superb for children with SEN - where the staff as a whole (with the exception of his 1:1, who was superb) believed they knew better than us and better than DS’s medical professionals. According to the class teacher I was a liar. I had paranoia. I was trying to make the school lie. The senco demanded to know what it was I wanted “from all of these diagnoses you’re chasing”. They ‘lost’ or ‘were never given’ every single bloody questionnaire that paediatrics passed to us to give them. Our paediatrician told us he wanted to make diagnoses of ASD and ADHD but he couldn’t because the school said there was nothing wrong at all. Eventually we moved to another school. Soon after we left, the senco was promoted to a different role, and the class teacher who had accused me of lying and having paranoia…. became the new senco. You couldn’t make it up!

This was eight years ago and it still feels very raw. No family should ever have to struggle like this to get the diagnosis and treatment their child needs.

Adhd often exhibits as inability to focus, easily distracted etc. Working one to one would likely keep a child engaged so you wouldnt see it. How much time are you spending one to one with them? Is it 3 full days or just a bit of time on 3 days? They still need to cope in group lessons. If they need a 1 to 1 then there must be some sort of issue surely?

@beatrice82

If you are still around, this dropped into my inbox today, you might find it useful.

adhdfoundation.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/REFOCUSING-ON-ADHD-IN-EDUCATION-compressed.pdf?fbclid=IwAR1LNTRmSacHu8of4ob_7drihPNmx_teoWpaHBqO69cuXAhsX5XVSoHyT5o

Ds went through assessment for ADHD. He doesn't have it, he has autism.

The reason they give medication is that ADHD is often caused by chemical imbalances. Yes, questionnaires about behaviour etc etc were filled in but also computer based tests where ds had to wear something on his head and his movement, eyes etc were tracked as he was reacting to things on a screen. (I'm vague as parents were not allowed in the room so as not to skew results).

Medication would have no effect on ds as he doesn't have ADHD. Those children who are given it are given it for a reason.