How much 'structured' learning do you do with your kids?

[Mo2]

I'm still rather new to all the school/ education discussions, as DS1 (nearly 5) just started Reception in Sept.

However I'm beginning to worry a bit about whether we're doing enough of what I'd call 'structured' learning activities out of school, by that I mean handwriting practice/ reading/ numbers etc.

We do stories every night for about 20-30 mins, during which time DS reads his school reader and we also read a more complicated book out loud together and talk about things.

Recently we've started talking about numbers/ money/ coins etc, but not really structured it in any way - it's a bit ad hoc.
Equally we don't 'practice' handwriting as such, although he does do puzzles/ dot-to-dots/ and a few trace over words in comics etc as well as writing birthday cards etc.
At weekends we do swimming (30 mins) and singing/ drama (1 hour).
He also love playing on the computer and has some educational CDs and also goes to BBC/ Cbeebies etc (although we don't usually sit with him while he does this).

Based on the other "Are we naive" thread, I just wondered if we should be doing more at home to support his school time learning??

I suppose to date I've always assumed if we provided a range of varied activities at home he would sort of 'pick things up' through play.

Our friends with kids the same age have commented on his good verbal skills and confidence, and he has lots of friends at school, and has settled in well, so I sort of feel we must be doing OK, but it all seems so... well... ad hoc really!!

It sounds like you are doing just fine with him to me I think children get enough structured learning at school, without it at home all the time too. The typs of activities you are doing sound great, and you are keeping it fun

Well if you aren't doing enough, nor am I as this is EXACTLY what we do. The only thing I would add is that dd1 does do a lot of drawing/handwriting stuff too - she loves to copy words out of books even if she can't read them.

I have tried to point out more words in an 'everyday' context and thats about it.

Other than the "set" homework from school, I don't do anything "structured" with - never have done!

DD2 (Reception) comes home with homework on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. This includes 6 words to learn and spell, plus "letter sheets" and a reading book. The letter sheets only come home on a Friday to be done over the weekend.

She will sit down on her own accord and copy words, write letters and numbers - but I've never sat down and completed stuff with her. This is because I think she does enough in school and whilst she was at nursery. Don't think it's done her any harm as she is well ahead with most of her work.

Same goes for DD1 (Year 4) and DS1 (Year 2) - never did any structured stuff with them (other than homework) and they are both top in their classes for literacy and numeracy. DD1 is the "top" speller in her whole Year Group and the only one to have achieved 100% in her spellings.

We do lots of ad-hoc stuff, like counting money, taking away four chocolate buttons from 6, that sort of thing, and ds loves reading to me, so he either reads his school reading book or some of his bedtime story every night.

But very little structured stuff. My ds too is very confident, verbally advanced, aware of numbers.

We had parents evening yesterday, and ds's teacher stressed using numbers in real life, reading out signs and stuff, but above all keeping it FUN

Phew! Don't feel quite so bad now....

One of the things I find a bit confusing is that I don't feel I know exactly what I'm meant to be doing with the various bits of paper which come home in his school bag - phonics sheets - words - etc . ALthough I suppose if I thought about it a bit it's probably obvious. I think because DH does all the school runs I feel rather distanced from it - I feel sure he's not passing on all the info, although he assures me he is!!

What you are doing sounds fine to me. I've tried to do structured stuff with ds (7 in March) over the past couple of years but he has to be in the right frame of mind otherwise I am wasting my time and he gets silly and frustrated. We have a stash of work books - mostly as yet undone - and loads of other "educational" materials and games. However he has a full day at school during which they have the best of his attention and time. When he comes home he wants to play with his toys and his sister first and foremost, so we focus on his homework and reading during the week.

At weekends dh will usually play games with him -Battleships, board games of the ELC variety, sometimes Scrabble and so on - plus we'll go swimming or some other form of physical exercise. If he is up for it I'll do something specifically educational and workbooks. We do take some workbooks on holiday with us and he'll choose to do them plus I'll try to do something more over the school holidays, especially when dd is still out at playgroup and my time is less divided.

hth

Nothing other than homework. We always read to them, but that is for fun. We also have fun work books , colouring , crafty stuff, educational computer stuff but they do that if they want too. We also go swimming, but for fun and a splash. Dd , 7, does the cello, but that was her choice and her responsibility.

I do very little with ds, who's 7. We talk about numbers and letters if he shows an interest (how much money have I got? How many chocolates will it buy me? me: you work it out); I read a story every night and have done for years and we walk and talk and generally have a lovely time at home. I don't think you should be doing too much at 5 tbh.

Agree with others - I've noticed ds' eyes glazing over if we err away from ad-hoc and light-hearted! I think you're doing just fine. We had a "what does A-n-n S-u-m-m-e-r-s sell mummy?" moment on the top deck of a bus during half-term, and "Why do rappers kill, not guns?"...being able to piece together signs and posters is a very mixed blessing isn't it?
I am loving this age now ds is less antsy. It's so much fun doing things together, sharing books and ideas etc.

grr this structured learning mallarkey makes my blood boil, it is in a child's nature to be curious and to learn, there is no need to impose structured learning on them, they get enough of that at school!

Although ds1's day is kept structured (as he needs routine) we don't do any structured learning at home. He has his own library card which he uses regularly. Sometimes a word or a picture in his book will set of a small discussion that leads to other ideas and concepts but this is purely spontaneous. I don't set out to do this. Paper and pens/crayons etc are available if he feels like doing any drawing. Sometimes he will ask if he can do some tracing like he does at school.

In Reception the emphasis is very much on learning through play so it would make sense to continue this idea rather than going for very structured learning IYSWIM. In any case school is very tiring for young children. When they get home they generally just want to relax and play.

OOOOOh Coppertop, I'd forgotten about tracing from when I was a kid. I loved it, as I can't draw anything freehand, and ds seems to have inherited my artistic abilities.

Right, off to find some tracing paper and pictures suitable for tracing. I like to have activities ready to suggest when we turn off the telly at weekends.

Spacemonkey - I* do know what you mean, and that's why I asked the question! However DS1 in particular seems to like structure/ organised activities, and sometimes I feel lacking in inspiration, so some sort fo resources are quite useful.

On the basis of what I've heard here, I don't plan to change anything....

Mo2, sorry I didn't mean to imply any criticism of your question at all

this is a bit of a hobby horse of mine that's all

Oh no - don't worry - no offence taken - guess I was just admitting that sometimes I use more structured resources as inspiration.

In my 'dream life' I am that organised Mum who plans activites for each week, linked to seasons/ festivals/ holidays etc, makes relevant craft thingies and researches appropriate stories....

In reality I work full time, come home exhausted, open a bottle of wine and flop in front of Nick Jr, then spend weekends full of angst over how little I've done with my kids during the week .

Good for you Mo2 ! I would tend to agree with you and SM except for the fact that ds is due to enter a UK school, probably next September, and his current school's curriculum doesn't do formal learning in the same way, so there are going to be gaps in his knowledge. Supplementing with work books, educational games and so on are our means of addressing this but can't help wondering whether, if we were in UK, I would feel less pressure to do this.

Spacemonkey - me too!!!

Not having a go at Mo2 at all - I sometimes find myself thinking 'eek, I don't do enough' but v. quickly go back to my normal thinking which is that there is plenty of time for school, homework etc and I'm not going to make my kids do anything else if they don't want to. They DO learn from play, from observing surroundings, interacting with adults and peers - why do more!? It doesn't have to be structured!

When we were all school age, did our parents sit down with us and try to do 6 million extra things??? Are we all stupid???

I'm bloody sick of people saying 'oh, isn't your ds very bright/sociable/outgoing... for a child that doesn't go to nursery' - ARGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGH! FFS - let them be kids!!!

I reiterate - I also sometimes wonder, like you MO2 but only because most of my friends are so obsessed with their kids being the next Einstein!! Academics are not everything and some kids rebel against it anyway if you push them!

Point made, rant over

It made me laugh when a few weeks ago I was moaning to DH that I felt I didn't do enough with the kids, and how I wished I was more "Martha Stewart" like (Check out www.marthastewart.com if you don't know what I mean...)

And dh said "what, in prison, then??"
(I didn't know she's gone to jail for some fraud case )

A bit of a sidestep from this, but on-topic from the view of being an 'ideal mother'

Has anyone heard Victoria Wood's routine about being an Enid Blyton type mummy. Doing picnics, days at the seaside, all that type of stuff. If not, seek it out. I'm pretty sure it on her "Victoria at the Albert" dvd

It's not really off the topic Easy - it's true, it's kind of how we all think we are supposed to be for some reason!! It's just not reality as there are other things you have to be doing sometimes rather than having one-to-one with each child!!!