Reading habit for child during holiday

[Hope4newlife]

Hi,

Thank you for your attention. I have been concerning about my child's education who is bilingual. When he is with me, he knows that he has to read an English book every day, like brushing his teeth. Our child arrangement order said that the father has to take the child to a language school to learn his mother tongue and another half culture and identity on Saturdays which he has been doing because of the court order.

However, he is saying to our child who is going to be y2 in September. You don't study at the weekend. You are too young to study. The weekend is family time.
He has never helped my child's second language school homework which he is capable of nor English school homework while he is having my child during the week on the term time that he lied at the court hearings that he has been doing so well since separation and insisted that he will do. So I always ended up catching up with my child's homework on my own and my child hated that mum always pushed him to do homework while at his dad's he doesn't have to do all but play.

He probably only read books for a couple of times for the last 1y and 8months for my child(not encourage our child to read) from English school only.

When I suggested he can encourage our child to have a good reading habit during a long summer holiday, he refused, saying that it's his holiday and he is having a lot of fun.

I am not forcing him to do anything but suggesting. But it seems like he doesn't bother, saying whatever I suggest is all "bullshit"

I don't feel that it’s fair for my child and his future and I don’t think that he is supporting enough for my child's education.

What do you guys suggest?

summerreadingchallenge.org.uk/

You're both right. You need to encourage reading for fun, then he might choose to do it at other house.
Weekends and hols are for fun when you're 7, but reading skills are important.

I think youre right as 1/4 of the year isschool holidays so the difference between achild reading during them is 1y in 4.
Then add in the weekends the difference is huge. Weve just been on holiday and 9yo read every night. 6yo has been doing maths worksheets every night.

I totally feel necessary to encourage a child to read every day but my ex has been accusing me that I abuse my child " force to study after school every single day" while I have my child during the week which isn't even true.

My child read a book or two at bedtime(one always is brought from school and another one is online book that is also provided from school which I believe the school can see reading activities) and he reads only when he is with me.

After school, he does around 5 minutes each in English and Maths (one page each). It's an extra exercise but not everyday when he is with me and not at my weekend either. The rest is all homework that my child must do and on time. When you think about going to his dad's during term time during the week and every other weekend, plus half of all holidays in between two houses, his actual reading opportunity is significantly less and homework piling up.

I am literally chasing up his homework because his dad doesn't do it when he is with my child and I have been struggling.

If he thinks 5 minutes of doing extra (one page each of two subjects probably 2-3 times maximum out of 7 days is an abuse, I could argue with that his ignorance towards education for his child isn't an abuse? It is not good enough even If he just shut his mouth and let me do my job when my child is with me but he encourages my child not to study, not to ready, insisting my child is only British which I think insane. and asking his own child " does mummy forces you to study every single day after school?" and then whatever my 6 years old child answered him, he turns around and accuses me "is it true that you make him study every single day after school?" I see he is manipulating my child. I cannot believe how a dad does such things to his child!

so I was wondering if there are different opinions?

What is the school expecting? I would use that as amunition. I have a six year old and after two years of school disruption I feel there is lots of ground to make up. At this age the long school holidays is too long not to study. I also feel for you that the father is not doing his share so that you have to make your son work harder when he is with you and he has nothing but fun at his Dad’s whilst he is also undermining what you are doing by his comments. I would gather up plenty of evidence on the impact of regular reading versus not reading etc, learning loss over the summer etc and send him some of this with a comment about the benefits you are hoping to help him achieve. Also send him guidance from the school if this supports what you are doing.

I dont know if you have any recourse to return to court if he continues to refuse to support his learning and homework? You have many years ahead when homework will increase so you may need to research this. Perhaps someone on this thread would know whether this can be revisited in court if necessary?

These are my top tips for reading.
Find time each day to read. Talk to the school and see what they can recommend as a solution etc. Tell your other half why reading matters and list ways to make it fun for your child too. Perhaps you can even find a reading club at your local library or start one of your own.
Try acting out scenes or have a interesting lively discussion of themes that the book revolves around. You could even ask your child to write a email or letter to the book author with his thoughts. Or you can ask your child to predict what may happen next.