Major concerns about placing 11 ye old dd

[oscarandelliesdad]

Sorry-a bit of a saga..
We moved from the Scottish system to the English one in April of this year. Dd had been in primary six where she was one of the older kids but she is quite young for her age and shy. She was doing well academically but not bored or treading water at all. Her birthday is Jan 2010. When we moved systems we also moved countries (out to the UAE)
I was told when we joined that although it would mean skipping a whole years education they had decided to place her in Yr 6. They said it had been a tricky decision but on balance this was their recommendation . I was told that the pastoral support was amazing, that she would have a great last term and be ready to transition up to secondary after the summer.
She has had a really miserable time, to the extent where I have been really concerned about her mental health. She has been crying herself to sleep most nights and struggling with school refusal and horrible anxiety on many occasions. The class teacher has been friendly but I have had to really push for any support for her. There was a five day public holiday and a week of formal assessments following that so she hasn't had that much learning time and the curriculum is a year ahead of the learning she has covered. This was especially obvious in maths and science (she hadn't even started a lot of the concepts and would need a lot of catch up) .
The school here has experienced far, far less academic disruption but the children all wear face masks, are socially distanced and have no toys to play with. At lunch and break they watch movies so it has been really hard to make friends to compound all this.
I spoke to management a week ago and they agreed that she could stay in year 6 next year and that they now agreed with my concerns about her going up to the attached secondary.
My problem is that in the last week dd feels like she has finally started making friends and now wants to go up with them (although none of them will be in her form).
Her end of term assessments came in and she has dipped from being top set (9) to a 4 (just above requiring support)
Am I right to get her to do the whole of year 6 from scratch? Will she be way older than everyone?
We want to move back to Scotland in a few years and I would like her to be able to slot back on with her friends back there and be hitting uni at 18 rather than 17.
My older dd is at the secondary school and says that although the teaching is good, there is very little social element as everyone is in full covid mode and therefore no group work and all done on individual laptops on distanced desks.

What would you do wise people?

Reading that through, I think I sound more critical of the school than I mean to. They were very accommodating at our last meeting. We just disagreed back when we joined and I should have stuck to my guns perhaps...

I'm in Scotland and mine are in private secondary school. There are children joining the whole time, including from international schools overseas. This does mean there is a wide range of ages in the one year group. DD2 has 2 friends who have same birthday but one is year older than other as came from overseas.
As far as I can see the school tends to place them at the most appropriate stage for them educationally and not worry too much about their age.

I suppose what I'm saying is if you feel your DD would benefit from properly finishing primary school educationally, socially and emotionally then go with repeating Y6 and don't worry too much about age . When you return to Scotland if she's in secondary she will need to join with the correct year for the stage she's at exam wise rather than age.

Thanks @Sootess that is really relevant. We are moving from the state system to private as well so lots of changes. I'm feeling more resolved to keep her following her own curve today and ride out the protestations, just didn't want her to be the oldest by two years. Thanks for the reply

I'll come back after work if you want, but I would check how many other kids the school accept out of year - she could be the oldest by nearly 9 months, which would be quite a big gap looking at how my child changed Y6/Y7.
We did the move the opposite way to you at a similar point - international school in Gulf to Y6 Englush primary.
Honestly, secondary has been the making of him. I would suspect the secondary will need to recap most of Y5/Y6 concepts, because they need to be secure to progress and they never know the level ut was taught to in Primary - particularly true in your situation with a very high turnover of kids.

Sorry, got to go to work.

Thanks @PeonyTime

Hello again,

Coming into a new school, in a new country, during a pandemic is going to be tough. Added to that she hit exam week with very little (if any) preparation is going to be unnerving.
What was the set 9 placement based on? Only dropping to set 4 (just below the middle) when she hasnt done the lessons is impressive.
I'd give her 2 options: if she wants to move up with those she knows, you need to do some work over the summer - you should be able to get some CGP year 6 work books and/or study books for maths, science (look for KS2) and English delivered to you in UAE from bookdepository.com (free international shipping).
Or she can stay in Y6, and do the work she would have done if you stayed in Scotland.

It sounds like you have a big school. Ours was small, but the kids were nearer the top in our international school than in their state primary. How accademic is the school you are in?

A third option, if she doesnt like the stigma of staying back in her current school is to see if there is a Y6 place at a different school. The feasibility of that will, of course, depend on your location!

Honestly, the first (covid isolation ridden) term of Y7 here was loads of foundation stuff to ensure they had a solid, common, grounding. BUT, it will probably be easier to hold her back now than in 12 months. How long do you think you will be in the UAE for? Is doing highers in Scotland or iGCSE abroad more likely?

Thanks so much for that @PeonyTime
She has come from a school that had great pastoral care and a fab soft curriculum but that wasn't very academic to one that is more so but still not very rigorous. The parts of the curriculum she had covered were within grasp but not easy. We do anticipate that she will be back in Scotland by gcse type stage. I was thinking along similar lines to you, I said that we should consider summer catch up if she wanted to move up. She is mulling it over this week. I really appreciate the input. It was a no brainer as far as Ed psych and our old head teacher were concerned but people here look at me like I am utterly barking...

I also hadn't thought 9f that third option which might be quite tempting for her...