Are we mad: Wycombe/CLC/Marlborough/Teddies?

[NicolaMarlowsMerlin]

DD has gained places at all the above, and an academic scholarship to Marlborough. She’s keen on Marlborough now, with a sense that she’d be better off in a mixed school after 5 years at a pretty alpha girls’ prep. She wants to have fun as well as pursue what interests her. She is pretty straightforwardly academic, she is good at art and music but not outstanding (grade 5 with a merit not great 8 with a distinction!), keen on sport but not in the A team etc. She is passionate about physics, almost at the boundaries of philosophy.

I really like the focus of the Marlborough scholars programme - very broad, emphasis on learning to think, self-management, real scholarship - so that is swaying me, although obviously the results for WA and CLC are better. Think we have now discounted Teddies, much as it’s clearly a lovely place. What I’m suddenly having cold feet about is the full boarding, not sure I’m ready for her to be gone for three weeks at a time!

Thoughts welcome.

And yes I know we should have decided already. We are crap. But we’ve got to decide now.

Marlborough very good for feisty sociable all rounder girls who love sport - not known for its academics. Lots of London children who love a party. Your daughter sounds more like WA or at least a co-Ed version would suit.

In your shoes I would choose CLC for its exceptional science teaching, but it’s a very long way from anywhere, so may not be convenient if you don’t like full boarding. WA may be a good compromise.

Your other two are not academic enough for bright girls, unless you definitely wanted co-ed because of a male sibling and had a daughter with some spirit.

100% WA or CLC unless you have a very compelling reason to go co-ed or really need the scholarship money. The academics just don't compare at the other two.

She can always go co-ed at sixth form - and will almost certainly go co-ed at university!

I would also consider how your DD does in that sort of "alpha" girls environment. Some kids (mine included) have enough internal "push" and are happier and achieve more in a less pressured environment. Co-ed is often good for this - boys don't cry or berate themselves over "only" getting 85%!

If your DD would be happier in a mixed school for that reason then I'd go for Marlborough. Happier kids perform better IMO, and a school like Marlborough will have quality teaching etc.

@Dillydaffy

Marlborough very good for feisty sociable all rounder girls who love sport - not known for its academics. Lots of London children who love a party. Your daughter sounds more like WA or at least a co-Ed version would suit.

I agree with Dillydaffy’s summary of the type of DC that would suit Marlborough. However having had a DD at Marlborough for 6th form and who gained a place at Oxbridge, I strongly disagree that it’s not great for academics. It does amazingly well with those DC who are academically driven but it does not want to be a hot house only focused on academic achievements. They really want sociable all rounders not a DC who will get great grades but not participate in school life.

If your DD wants to board let her. The exeats come around very quickly and especially in 6th form (outside lockdown) it’s fun, sociable and like a mini university. PM me if you would like any more information.

And the Physics Dept is fab with teachers who (at least in 6th form) teach more like a university lecturer.

I love Teddies for its Arts. And would choose Marlborough over any of them for a very sporty child. But neither of them have anything like the same academic reputation as WA or CLC.

Having said that, your daughter feeling that she has chosen a school is very important for her happiness. And any of those schools will get a bright child to their potential. Just because a school isn't renowned for its academics doesn't mean an already academic child won't be stretched and achieve well there.

We deliberately rejected CLC and WA as we felt Marlborough offered a more rounded education. But it depends what you want. We immediately rejected WA for being too much of a hot house with very little wider life and social preparation. We seriously considered CLC but my DD just felt that again socially it was quite limited. A trip into town and a pizza was as exciting as it got. My DD loved Marlborough but it wouldn’t suit everyone. It is a quirky school and has a broader academic intake but that gave the school a richness and diversity that my DD felt she would not get at CLC or WA.

It depends if you want education as a means to an end (Oxbridge) or whether you want education to be a preparation for life. Marlborough is certainly the latter. Someone in Mumsnet once said that some schools are schools and others are country clubs with a school attached. Marlborough was definitely more of the latter and much more fun and broadening as a result.

If she has a nice time for the first 3 years but it isn’t quite academic enough, there’s always the option of an unashamedly academic 6th form at Winchester College which will be coed sixth form by then.

I would think WA and CLC are quite different to Marlborough - chalk and cheese?

A prep head I know only steers the most socially strong children in Marlborough's direction and choose not to send his own children there even though they were at a feeder prep. There are some very strong characters there and you have to be able to take them on to be happy. For the right child it is a cracking place to be, for the wrong child, miserable. There are a lot of London children there who frequent the London party scene which we have all read so much of in the last weeks.

I think there is less of the London party scene at Marlborough than similar schools eg Wellington or Charterhouse simply because it is full boarding.

Thank you everyone, this is such a helpful discussion! It’s so hard but in the end aren’t we lucky (isn’t she lucky) to have such fab places to choose from. I had a very good chat with the admissions director which helped a lot. I am still nervous about the coed thing particularly given the news over the last two weeks, but DD is very keen on Marlborough and the option to do GCSE astronomy and participate in a stimulating and specifically designed scholarship programme among other things has won us over. She isn’t super tough but she is resilient and she’s pretty anti the alpha all-girls atmosphere as that’s what she’s had for the last four years at her prep. She’s up for throwing herself into activities including her beloved Music tech and art, and I think will make the most of boarding. And we can trust her to work to her top level even if she’s got less direct challenge around her (and I’m sure there will be plenty of other kids in her interest/ability group anyway).

And I’ve got 6 months to get used to it!

Any advice on packing lists, what they need to be in with the in-crowd on off duty wardrobe etc., let’s have in another thread! We are country mice and I’m sure she’s got none of the right stuff.

I really hope your DD enjoys Marlborough. Best advice ai can give is that it can take a little time to settle. They all hit a wall a few weeks in when they are tired and a bit homesick but they will come through that.

As for the clothes. After the shock of paying for over £1k of uniform for my DD (and sporty boys cost even more) I don’t think many parents send their DC with many other clothes! They love their slouchy, casual clothes at Marlborough. Lots of vintage too. It certainly was not the designer paradise which you may imagine. Most important other things to pack include a really thick bed topper as beds are hard as iron and some battery operated fairy lights to brighten up their sleeping area.