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Original poster

which school would YOU choose?

57 replies

pooodle · 19/10/2007 23:09

Hi all. Need advice for secondary, here are the options:

Preference A: School I teach at, c of e, 83% a-c, around 70 inc eng and maths. has 6th form, so around 1600 students. Lovely christian ethos, nice kids. Son wouldnt know any other kids there when he start, well he would, but they are girls he doesnt play with at school. Son not particulary religious. Average intelligence, fairly lazy boy!

Preference B: Local comp, just got outstanding at last ofsted, 45% special needs, (45%!), sons friends are mostly going there, gcse results around 50%, but not including english and maths (more like 30ish i think). School is just round corner from house we have just moved into, he is allowed to play out and has made lots of new friends who go/will be going. School is a "bit" chavvy, I did my first teacher training there and wasnt really impressed, but since then they have had the ofsted result. Around 650 kids. Son has tics sometimes, scrunches eyes, ocd type behaviour, though not too bad. No 6th form. Son wants to go to this school, best friend is going (bit of a scally, very working class (mum swears alot etc!)

If son does get preference A, do you think I would be wise to send him, it is the "best" school academically, but I dont want to make him miserable by moving away from his friends.

What would you do?

OP posts:
Original poster
pooodle · 20/10/2007 20:11

city boys in portsmouth. what can they do, sack me?!

OP posts:
Original poster
pooodle · 20/10/2007 20:32

"Half of secondary schools in England fail to give pupils a good education, Ofsted has warned"

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/10/17/nschool317.xml

One time I would agree with Ofsted.

Maybe if he doesnt get in i should look at private.

OP posts:
Fennel · 21/10/2007 09:00

My father was a teacher at the large secondary school I went to. And yes it was a problem. It was quite common in our school as there was only one school in the town but I wouldn't recommend it at all if you have a choice. Teachers' children often get a hard time, from other teachers as well as from children. And your children might not tell you, we didn't tell our parents at the time how much grief we got about it.

seeker · 21/10/2007 09:11

I'm going to buck the trend -and tend towards school B. Partly because of the friends thing, but partly because both my brothers went to a school our dad taught at and they hated it!

But I think I would be mostly influenced by what he wants.

I don't think having a mum who swears a lot is significant BTW, - so do my dcs!

ThreeGs · 21/10/2007 09:16

Has he visited both? I think I'd arrange a visit to school A and make sure he saw all the things that would appeal to him. Maybe, see if you can get an older boy, with Street-cred to show him round.

Then, have a heart-to-heart and tell him the police only take people with GCSEs and the best place to get them is school A. Do school A do Duke of Edinburgh, with a chance to spend time with the local police?

FlameBat · 21/10/2007 09:33

Speaking as someone who was sent to school A when all my friends went to school B....

I say show him both schools, explain the pros and cons of both, and let HIM decide.

I was given no choice about losing all of my friends (playing at weekends etc fizzles out, especially when you both get teased about having a friend from the "other" school). I stayed there for 5 years in a weird forced friendship (we were always put together, I didn't like her much but I didn't have anyone else to be friends with iyswim), very little self esteem (because of said friendship) by the time I got to college and made real friends

I know that is just one way it could go, but had I been given the choice, it would have been MY decision for how those 5 years turned out.

TotalChaos · 21/10/2007 10:55

seeing as school B has such a high proportion of pupils with special needs, it may well be that the teaching is as good as school A, despite the lower GCSE results.

I would let him choose.

Original poster
pooodle · 21/10/2007 14:11

Wow flamebat thats really sad, im sorry to hear that. That is exactly what I am worried about! School b have the highest Value added in county, which is a measurement of childs ability when starting in relation to when leave, so they must be doing something right? maybe thats what ofsted picked up on, as i say, i wasnt really there on teaching practice long enough to judge, my feelings were based on some naughty kids in my class.

school a do have a fab duke of edinburgh, kids either seem to love it or hate it there, i am a form tutor to year 8, took them in year 7, and quite a few went up with not many friends, some have really soared, but lots have also really struggled despite my best efforts of getting them to make friends. 2 in particular are like you flamebat, stuck with each other, one very able, rubs it in the others nose, she has found really difficult.

oooh its a tough one. Please keep comments coming, i need to get this one right!

OP posts:
Original poster
pooodle · 21/10/2007 14:14

he has visited both schools, school a only did open evening which he liked, then school b had a taster day for year 6's plus open evening, he liked both. his preference is school b, but he has chav tendencies which i know would be increased by amount of chavs at school b, school a has a few, but mostly well to do families.

OP posts:
prufrock · 21/10/2007 14:16

B - never ever have your child at the secondary school you teach at (another teacher's daughter speaking from experience)

Original poster
pooodle · 21/10/2007 14:20

blimey thats strong prufrock, is it really taht bad?

OP posts:
WideWebWitch · 21/10/2007 14:20

I'd go with A. You teach there, it's got good results, a sixth form and you don't have the reservations you have about school b.

he'll make friends at school a, it sounds like the better school. I wouldn't be too concerned about his preferences, my ds would prefer lots of things I disagree with but I make the decisions I think will be best for him.

WideWebWitch · 21/10/2007 14:22

Hey and you weren't impressd with school b when you went there. I can't see any reason to send hn there tbh

bossybritches · 21/10/2007 14:28

I jsut keep thinking of the phrase "bored boys are naughty boys"

If he's a bit of a lazy boy then maybe school A will give him the kick up the bun he needs! School B might be too much of a good time but no work scenario & peer pressure is a powerful thing at that age for good AND bad!

CantSleepWontSleep · 21/10/2007 14:33

School A. He can still play out with his other friends if he wants, but will make new ones, and education is important for his whole life, so not worth compromising on IMO.

perpetualworrier · 21/10/2007 17:58

It's got to be B surely.

If it's got 45% special needs and still GCSE results are Ok it's working miracles.

Way too much faith is put in schools. How a child turns out is influenced much more by what they see at home. The only reason a school is "good" as far as league table results are concerned is becuase it's surrounded by the type of homes where children get what they need.

All they need from secondary school is the results to get them to where they want to go next. If you don't think your child cen get that at whatever school he goes to despite having you as a parent, it's not going to make much difference where he goes.

There - that's the cat amongst the pigeons.

MrsLynetteScavo · 21/10/2007 18:06

I wouldn't advise you to send your son to the school where you teach. The most horrid year of my life was my first year at secondary; my mother taught at the school. Thankfully she left at the end of the school year, but I was still known for a long time as xxx's daughter.

chopchopbusybusy · 21/10/2007 18:36

I think this is a very tough choice. I think I might go for B because I think he will have a hard time at A because you teach there. It could impact on you too if he decides he really doesn't like it and his behaviour is bad. I would also have a good talk to him and point out that in return for agreeing with his decision you expect hard work and good behaviour or he will be moved.

Is there a choice C? Or are these the only possible choices.

OrmIrian · 21/10/2007 18:40

I don't know. I have to say that assuming that he will still keep his mates from primary if they are going to another school may ne optimistic. In our town there is intense rivalry between some of the schools. You've already said that they call them 'bible bashers' - that was it wasn;t it?

amicissima · 21/10/2007 18:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WorkingClassScum · 21/10/2007 18:50

Given that B is such a bad school maybe it's undersubscribed and then if he cannot fit in at school A you would be able to easily transfer him to school B. No decision is the end of the world.

Original poster
pooodle · 21/10/2007 18:51

Yes they do call them bible bashers. Im really suprised that some of you feel so strongly about me being a teacher at same school, obviously i havent been in the same situation as my mum isnt one however i didnt realise it caused such a problem for the child! The kids are fairly "nice", well most of them, there are a few litte so and sos, will he really get alot of stick? other thing is he does have tics/ocd behaviour, and i thought he might be better at school a cos of the nicer kids, rather than have rougher ones take the mick.

he does have a private tutor twice a week after school, as he is coming up for his sats, and i would do same for gcse, as long as he gets 5 a-c inc maths and english thats my main concern for his attainment, and lots of it is coursework still (for now anyway). but the biggest problem is his chav factor, a "friend" has sent him 50cents "candy shop" on his phone, i have made him delete it but its that kind of thing with the local kids. arghghghghghg

OP posts:
Original poster
pooodle · 21/10/2007 18:54

WorkingClassScum he would get in at school b as although second choice his lives in catchment so would go above kids who had chosen it first "out of catchment". we are on the boundary of a county, i am on the right side! i think usually fill 120 ish of 150 places, but would imagine they fill year 7 due to outstanding ofsted.

OP posts:
NKF · 21/10/2007 18:56

School A.
That gap between with and without English and Maths is very worrying.

CantSleepWontSleep · 21/10/2007 18:58

Should add that my parents had to choose between a school that nearly all of my primary friends were going to, which there was ready transportation to, or a private catholic (we weren't catholic, or religious in any way) school (which they would have to scrimp and save for) further away for me. They chose the private catholic school. I made new friends and got good grades, hence my recommendation.